Why are (young adult) guys really shy sometimes around girls?

Because they really like them and don't know the perfect approach.

When in reality there is no perfect approach, just be yourself and go talk to tha girl.

They might simply be shy because they're shy... it's just the way they are.

But, when a guy is shy around one specific girl, well, then it's probably because he really likes her, he might be intimidated, he's more conscious...

This is what I think anyway.

I'm glad someone ask this question because I was thinking the same thing

I am shy around some girls. Assertive around other girls. It really depends on the situation. It seems to me that I'm more shy around girls that are exceedingly attractive.
Plus, I do not enjoy failure so shyness might be a blessing sometimes.

Maybe this will help, I'm a quiet shy guy, I hardly ever speak around anyone I don't know, girls in particular, that's only because I don't want to say the wrong thing, or embarrass myself by stumbbling over my words. I don't speak much,so sometimes when I talk to get a point across I may trip over what I'm trying to say, so when I stutter, it really hits me hard, makes me feel like an idiot. But the only reason I stutter is because I'm shy.

And if it's a very attractive girl, you can forget about it. I probably won't even speak at all. Lol maybe a hi, and bye, but nothing else. Lol

Thanks for the tips shy guys

maybe this will help, im a quiet shy guy, i hardly ever speak around anyone i dont know, girls in particular, thats only because i dont want to say the wrong thing, or embarass myself by stumbbling over my words. I dont speak much,so sometimes when i talk to get a point across i may trip over what im trying to say, so when i stutter, it really hits me hard, makes me feel like an idiot. but the only reason i stutter is because im shy.

and if its a very attractive girl, you can forget about it. i probably wont even speak at all. lol maybe a hi, and bye, but nothing else. lol


Does a woman has to ask you out just to get your attention?

Lol well its like this: in my last relationship, I met this girl at one of my friends house, she was over there with her friend, she was just sitting on the couch.

I saw her on the couch and in my mind I thought "man, this girl is gorgeous." but I would never tell her. Lol my friend actually started talking to her first, well anyway the next day
I told my friend that I was really feeling the girl on the couch and he was like"really", so then I get this call and its him again, he says" remember that girl on the couch"? I'm like "yea why?" he said " well i told her you like her and shes going to call you today, i gave her your number". My heart dropped to that floor! Lol I screamed on him for a good 10 minutes! Lol but in the end him playing match maker actually started a pretty good relationship for me.

To tell you the truth if he didn't do that I probably would have never seen her again. Sometimes I think my shyness is a curse. Lol

You know the funny thing? She actually DID ask me out. Lol and I was like "hell yea"! Lol

lol well its like this: in my last relationship, i met this girl at one of my friends house, she was over there with her friend, she was just sitting on the couch.

i saw her on the couch and in my mind i thought "man, this girl is gorgeous." but i would never tell her. lol my friend actually started talking to her first, well anyways the next day
i told my friend that i was really feeling the girl on the couch and he was like"really", so then i get this call and its him again, he says" remember that girl on the couch"? im like "yea why?" he said " well i told her you like her and shes going to call you today, i gave her your number". my heart dropped to that floor! lol i screamed on him for a good 10 minutes! lol but in the end him playing match maker actually started a pretty good relationship for me.

to tell you the truth if he didnt do that i probably would have never seen her again. sometimes i think my shyness is a curse. lol

you know the funny thing? she actually DID ask me out. lol and i was like "hell yea"! lol


Thanks alizeblu, I think I might have a lunch date(LOL)

lol well its like this: in my last relationship, i met this girl at one of my friends house, she was over there with her friend, she was just sitting on the couch.

i saw her on the couch and in my mind i thought "man, this girl is gorgeous." but i would never tell her. lol my friend actually started talking to her first, well anyways the next day
i told my friend that i was really feeling the girl on the couch and he was like"really", so then i get this call and its him again, he says" remember that girl on the couch"? im like "yea why?" he said " well i told her you like her and shes going to call you today, i gave her your number". my heart dropped to that floor! lol i screamed on him for a good 10 minutes! lol but in the end him playing match maker actually started a pretty good relationship for me.

to tell you the truth if he didnt do that i probably would have never seen her again. sometimes i think my shyness is a curse. lol

you know the funny thing? she actually DID ask me out. lol and i was like "hell yea"! lol

Hey alizeblu,

Thanks for sharing!!... so funny :D

You must be one lucky guy. And you have a great friend there and I think that unlike you, (at least) he's not shy!! :p

Yea, but it wasn't luck. Lol but that's a story for another thread. Lol

I don't know, its crazy with us shy guys... we dare not pursue beauty.

When in reality beauty is out searching for us.

And we don't even know it, we're just too scared to appraoch.

Why are (young adult) guys really shy sometimes around girls?
that's because he madly truly in love with you he gets mesmorize evry tym your near to shy to speak speacily talking toa beautiful maiden such as you.. ^_^

Guyz like are people who have no any exp. When talking or meeting girlz they get confuse in what to do...

Well not all, some guys are completely confident in thierselves. Others (like me) are completely shy.

Why are (young adult) guys really shy sometimes around girls?
I use to be a shy guyn all you got to do is touch them in any way and we will act like we've known you forever

^^^^
huh?

Listen... if your shy and your sitting there alone at a prty or somthin and some fine comes over sits on your lap what the you going do cry?? No your going to in talk and act like a person... dont know how you find that funny

^^^
huh?

Why?> I'm shy. Why would it be not expected for a girl to wonder why guys like us are shy?

You said you wasn't expecting a po...

Oh duh! Never mind you meant the post, I thought you meant the question the whole threads about, never mind forget I said that.

Thank you guys for insight

I think I might give up on shy men because it's tooooo much work.I'm tried of figuring out does this guy like me or not.

Heh yea, you'll get tired of that though. You'll get tired of all these guys always coming up to you trying to mack you.

Then when you find that shy guy, you'll be all over him cause you enjoy the chase.

Heh.

I don't know if this shy guy likes me or not.

Umm if he's shy, usually, he probably does. The only thing is, he won't approach you.

He's too shy.

So just go for it, trust me it'll work. Just start talking to him, keep in mind that he's still SHY.

So don't give up if he doesn't respond, or acts akward, that just means he's not sure what's going on yet lol. Eventually if you keep at him he will give in and start communicating back with you.

When that happens, you got him.

I don't know if this shy guy likes me or not.

Why do you think so? What does he do that makes you wonder?
I'm in the same situation

My shy guy doesn't come over to me at work and talk.I have to approach him and get him to talk to me. I don't know if he likes me talking to him or not. Wouldn't a shy man have a problem telling a woman to get lost?

umm if hes shy, usually, he probably does. The only thing is, he wont approach you.

hes too shy.

so just go for it, trust me it'll work. just start talking to him, keep in mind that hes still SHY.

so dont give up if he doesnt respond, or acts akward, that just means hes not sure whats going on yet lol. eventually if you keep at him he will give in and start communicating back with you.

when that happens, you got him.


Oh my gosh,Your advice might be true.:p

Shy guys drive me 'mad' sometimes. They are quite confusing. :rolleyes:

Seriously, how can you tell if someone's interested in you if they are not able to approach you, talk to you, even smile at you, but only stare from afar for what seems like forever?

Shy guys drive me 'mad' sometimes. They are quite confusing. :rolleyes:

Seriously, how can you tell if someone's interested in you if they are not able to approach you, talk to you, even smile at you, but only stare from afar for what seems like forever?

Heh you got to understand how they operate that's all. Its all a game, just read the manual. There are a variety of guys out there who think differently and approach women differently. You can't expect every guy to approach women, we have different styles and perspectives.

I guess its just what you like. Cause it's the same for us.

Say there was a shy girl I wanted to talk to, I probably wouldn't have a good chance of getting her as I don't do the approaching, but a guy that is more aggressive would probably sweep her off her feet.

See what I'm saying?

Shy guys drive me 'mad' sometimes. They are quite confusing. :rolleyes:

Seriously, how can you tell if someone's interested in you if they are not able to approach you, talk to you, even smile at you, but only stare from afar for what seems like forever?


I agree with your post because I'm tired of my shy male co-worker not saying hello to me.I don't know if he's interested in me or not.

Shy guys cryptonite is usually being direct.

Just go to him and ask him if he likes you or not. Lol

I'm pretty sure he will say something strange at 1st, but be serious and make him feel uncomfortable by being overly nice and direct.

He'll cave.

shy guys cryptonite is usually being direct.

just go to him and ask him if he likes you or not. lol

im pretty sure he will say somthing strange at 1st, but be serious and make him feel uncomfortable by being overly nice and direct.

he'll cave.


We work together and he doesn't appoarch me.

So approach HIM.

Why are (young adult) guys really shy sometimes around girls?
Well, I can't answer around younger guys but I can give my insight around middle aged guys. I am a Mid-30s guy and still a virgin. I believe I am in my situation because of Asperger's Autism, where I am socially awkward and have problems with human contact. Having an Aspie view of the world gives me a different perspective but also keeps me locked in a bubble.

I think it depends on age and maturity, although sometimes age has nothing to do with it, i think its about their self confidence, the same as woman, some guys are less confident than others.
My man is quite shy, its just the way he is, if he doesnt know somebody, and hes almost 30, i can't speak for what he is like around girls, i just mean generally.
From experience guys are shy around girls they like.

I'm shy to an extent. It's not a nice thing to see someone you like you want to talk to it's like a gentle ghost is holding your neck, something stops you from talking and you feel uneasy. I am uncomfortable in social situations I don't speak random stuff to random people because I can't think of anything I would want to say to them.
If he is shy and you want to find out if he likes you just fold a piece of paper with your number on and say text me :) sounds immature but that way he will feel comfortable and also know that you like him.

I don't know how women feel, but I would prefer if women are really bold, its better they ask a guy out for coffee, lunch or dinner. As, of me being a guy I would prefer that as I am shy... I am finding it difficult to overcome that once I know her first and go out with her, once I go out with her and know her more, then that shyness goes away, but it is that initial reaction which what she would think, or how she would react, is always in my mind. Online or on the phone I can talk to anybody... But, when I know I like someone it is tough to talk direct. Also, its more for a guy like me who had been married for several years and never thought of a women and suddenly now divorced and single again its tough. Also, cultural differences play a lot. I am from a different culture, so for me its tough... and I am not like those young kid in the block again... I would love to find the women of my dreams again after so much of hurt and dead beat marriage I had... but, its hard and tough, but hope there will be a women for me who loves me for who I am and not for what I am...

Too much of preaching I suppose.. sorry girls. I just am a too nice guy, who had a bad marriage...

I don't know how women feel, but I would prefer if women are really bold, its better they ask a guy out for coffee, lunch or dinner. As, of me being a guy I would prefer that as I am shy..............I am finding it difficult to overcome that once I know her first and go out with her, once I go out with her and know her more, then that shyness goes away, but it is that initial reaction which what she would think, or how she would react, is always in my mind. Online or on the phone I can talk to anybody.............But, when I know I like someone it is tough to talk direct. Also, its more for a guy like me who had been married for several years and never thought of a women and suddenly now divorced and single again its tough. Also, cultural differences play a lot. I am from a different culture, so for me its tough.......................and I am not like those young kid in the block again...............I would love to find the women of my dreams again after so much of hurt and dead beat marriage I had..........but, its hard and tough, but hope there will be a women for me who loves me for who I am and not for what I am.............

Too much of preaching I suppose.. sorry girls. I just am a too nice guy, who had a bad marriage.......................

Don't beat yourself up, she was the wrong one das all, but yea I agree cause I find it difficult myself, to approach again after a break up.

What it is with shy guys, they find it difficult to approach cause of the rejection tip.

In our minds, we visualize the out come before it happens, and usually if we are insecure or just came out of a relationship, we tend to see bad outcomes in our head before we actually go up to the girl.

Which stops us dead in our tracks.

Which is why we don't do the approaching.

So basically let him know you like him!

He probably doesn't know.

So it seems like everyone is on the same page, some guys are shy and can't help it.

Think of it like this; we all had to learn how to ride a bike right? No one just started really good at it. Now imagine if we were never taught how to ride a bike and we had to learn on our own. Some would surely get it and some would fail. That's approaching women in a nut shell. Some of us never really learned how to interact and portray the things we wanted and some of us did.

If you're OK with being shy and not approaching women, that's great. If not, maybe looking at what exactly is making you feel approach anxiety in the first place would be a good place to start. I can say that in most cases, it's not knowing what to say at what moments that causes it.

They feel intimidated they want to be with the but think that they are 2 good for them

So maybe you should be taking a step back and saying to yourself, "My end result is sex (or a relationship or what ever). If I am starting with A and I want to get to C, all I have to do is figure out what B is and I'm in." Social interaction is very predictable.

I have that same shyness thing but normaly people are happy when they get the girl I kind of don't like it cuzz I don't know how to act around a girl

i dont know how to act around a girl

It's nothing complicated as long as you don't make a big deal out of it!

IT'S NOTHING COMPLICATED AS LONG AS YOU DON'T MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT!

Comments on this post
alizeblu agrees: Easy for you ta say.

Indeed. As any other thing, it's easy to say, but not so easy to do.

Yet, it is TRUE it's not that complicated and when we make it complicated, well.. we shouldn't!

Alizeblu, kristynn is right, but I'm afraid she states it too bluntly. As with a lot of things, it only makes sense if you understand it. That is were most people fall short when giving this type of advise. The people who have always understood it can not help the ones who have never been taught how. That and (no offence kristynn) girls give really bad advise when it comes to what girls want in a guy.

Most women will tell you they want a confident man with a good sense of humor and a good personality. The most important word in that list is man. Most advice from girls goes, "just be yourself and don't think about it too much, find a girl that is right for you." The problem with taking this advice is that they have no more idea in what they want than we do. Also, this does not address the question, "what if being yourself hasn't work?" "What if, "don't make it complicated", doesn't explain anything or help for that matter?"

I don't know what type of conflicts or problems you are having Alizeblu, but look up some of wildcat21's posts and Google a guy called David DeAngelo. And remember, there are no answers in this field, only tools to help you get to the answers.

Why are (young adult) guys really shy sometimes around girls?
Shy guys don't worry! - You are grounded, smart & sexy and what we are looking for in the long run..

Also a lot of it has to do with past experiences. Probably an embarrassing experience or put down and usually we don't want to re live it.

and if its a very attractive girl, you can forget about it. i probably wont even speak at all. lol maybe a hi, and bye, but nothing else. lol

Aw... now I see... if u like an attractive girl, u should say more than that! U guys don't understand it that attractive girls are wondering why you don't talk to her. She MIGHT want to talk to you;)

Shy guys, how can we help you be less shy around us?

Except from us having to come talk to u...

Hey,don't do that, that will scare them, I met a guy shaked when I sat next to him,lol. Well... I think we'll have to take them as they are. I personally like a shy guy, I think it is totally normal to be shy, that's really cute. BUT, it's just hard to tell if they like us or not... if they are too shy to tell us... ;)

Yea sucks doesn't it, too shy to approach, but usually they want us to approach, but I have to say, id never approach a gorgeous woman cause I'm not trina get turned down by a beauty, that alone would be devastating, lol.

My boyfriend used to be shy around me,but now he is crazy about me and won't stay away from me but I love him anyway...



LOVE CONQUERS ALL!!

Because we're scared. We really wona speak to you but we don't wona be turned down, for me I think that if I try to speak to a girl then she'll just laugh and poke fun at me :(, I duno why but I guess we just feel so much lower in the pecking order than the other guys around us we just don't see how a girl would ever wona speak to us! I'm speaking from countless nights of experience and rejection btw:(,