I had an affair with my nieces ex boyfriend. He is 44, with 3 adult kids, and I'm married and 43. It lasted for 2 months. The man, is separated, he lives in his own house and his wife lives in her own house. The affair ended on April 24, 2013 because my other niece approached him and asked him if we were having an affair.

The next day he texted me and said he needed to talk to me, I called him and we talked. He told me what happened and said that people are catching on. So now he wants to only be friends and nothing else.

I haven't been really close to my husband because he was distant since he was diagnosed with MS. The other man, I dreamed of having sex with for quite some time and I told him. I've been crying and texting the other man for sex, not a relationship. But he just wants to be friends. He said he thinks about us sexually but he thinks about what happened. Since then I try and make excuses up to see him. But he's distant from me. It seems he doesn't want to see or talk to me only by phone, which is texting.

What's wrong with him? And me?

What Kind of Affair was this?

An inappropriate one? You are married. Where did you think this would end up? Sorry, I don't support cheating, regardless of the reasons or excuses.

This will be harsh:

What exactly are you asking?

You had a sexual relationship with a man who is not your husband. Your excuse seems to be that your husband is battling MS and you needed to have sex. Your niece confronted him, your playmate, and he realized he was making a mistake. You haven't.

Do you want your niece to talk to your husband about your affair? That may be her next step.

I suggest getting rid of temptation by not trying to be friends with your ex-lover. If you need sex that much, talk to your husband and explain your needs to him and if he agrees to turn your marriage into an open relationship, then find a new person to play with. Or you can take care of your needs by masturbating with or without to and erotica. If you need emotional support look into support groups.

What is wrong with you is that you are thinking with your libido instead of your mind and conscience.

What's wrong with him, And me?

Him? Nothing anymore. He realized he was wrong to be doing what he was doing and he stopped. He has distanced himself from you to avoid any future problems and probably because you don't seem to get what "no" means.

You? You're selfish and are only thinking about yourself. Divorce your husband and then go play with as many guys as you want.

What kind of affair was this?

A cheap tawdry one like any other affair between selfish dishonest people.


What's wrong with him? And me?

He got caught and stopped but you are still stuck on stupid.