About 4 years ago I travelled to the states and had shopliffted but the charges were dropped however my mugshot is online for everone to see if they were to look me up. I struggled with what I had done through the completion of college bcus I was so ashamed of what I had done. I had many sleepless nights because I was so ashamed of myself... I thought that I was less of a person and at times I could not even look at myself bcus of the guilt I felt.

I had a friend in college who I was very close to had sleep overs and also studied with. I was very kind to this friend and always offered to help her in anyway I could... I even gave her soap when she didn't have any, however things took a sour turn when her boyfriend made advances on me but I declined I told a mutual friend what he had done and asked if I should tell my friend but they didn't think it was such a good idea because she tends to be very jealous, so I didn't tell her as the boyfriend agreed that he would never do such a thing like that agen so I didn't want to cause any problems in the relationship they had.

One day I asked my friend what she thought about a situatiion with me and my boyfriend and she totally bashed him saying that he was terrible which he wasn't realli in my opinion but she likes to feel this sense of superiority with everything out of anger I told her that he boyfriend isn't as great as she thinks else he wouldn't have approached her own friend. She went on to tell me how men just used me etc.. Which was realli mean coming from another woman.

We stopped bieng friends after that but after a yr or so later we started working at the same place it was a bank . I decided to make amends with her and thought it was so stupid for two good friends to not talk because of something so stupid she agreed. However things weren't quite the same about her she just didn't seem totally genuine. I even approached her another time and asked her if she was over it. She said yes... we even started going work together and having dinners together.

To get to the point I got transferred into the same department she was in and then things changed she would have to train me for a function or 2 N.B we are both on the same level. But it was as if she started to feel intimiadated by me and would try and make me look incompetent while on training and would say things like I need to remember it and not ask her... out loud for sups to here. At this point I was taken aback. Due to her behaviour. I told her that I think I'm going to start going to work by myself as she wanted to charge me to come to work with her and we like a min a way from each other... I always gave her everything for free I even offered to put gas in her car a few times and I was onli traveling with her for 2 weeks instead she wanted a set monthly payment. After this she started to malice me and even reported me to her sup that I was making jokes about her when it was realli the other way around just because I didn't want to give her money to go with her can you imagine that passing remarks that I was a leech etc...

She got so obessed with me that she went online and looked me up.. and passed a remarked just out of d blue at work that at least she's never been locked up before. I think she has crossed the line and is possibly going to try and get me fired. She keeps on trying to get into confrontations with me constanlty I've been trying my best to ignore her but it seems as if she's gotten realli malicious. Im a real hard working indivual who has no harsh feelings towards anyone but I think this girl is just evil and has no limits... help please tell me what to do as I don't want to lose my job bcus of this person. She totally hated me and I trying to get me in trouble constantly... help!!

We both work in a bank in the caribean.

OK, way too much information most people will not read over it.

If you were not convicted, charges dropped, you are not going to lose a job over this, and shoplifting is really a very minor crime, and most places of work will not make any difference anyway.

She crossed the line but best just drop it and let it go.

Thanks fr chuck.. really appricieate it.. thing is that I've dropped it but she hasn she keeps trying to get in my face sigh

This isn't something you can go over her head about. If you can't convince her to agree to stay away from each other as much as possible, I would start looking for another job. Maybe the bank would move you to another department, but put it delicately and keep it short. Just say that you and she had a falling out way before the job.

I would have agreed to a payment plan to be taken to work. It takes more than a minute just to pull up to someone's house, even if you are waiting outside, and I'll bet it is at least 10 minutes overall, a lot in the morning. And the expense of a car is 90% of it. If I take someone places routinely, I charge, even best of friends.

The car payment was reasonable but I just wasn't comfortable around her anymore that's the thing... I am wondering if I realli should start looking for another job actually the only issue is that jobs are terribly hard to find I was very lucky.

I can't guarantee if these will work.
1. Tell the bank about the shoplifting and about not getting along with her. Keep that second part to one sentence. Employers never want to hear about personal differences.
2. Talk to her about agreeing to stay clear of each other. Tell her the bank knows about the shoplifting. Gently suggest that it isn't wise to malign fellow employees; it often backfires.