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abram72
Mar 22, 2013, 11:08 PM
Hi, everyone

I need your help in this. I'm in this complicated relationship, and I really don’t know if I really love her, but it seems like that. I think this is my first love experience I’m 24 years old. Now we broke up I feel sick tired very lazy I sleep during the day watching my phone every second for no reason. We have been together for like 6 months but we became a couple after 3 months of our relationship she was my friend ex so that's why we didn't take it to another level from the start, I tried once though.
She’s virgin and Christian. She sleeps over almost every time she comes to my place we just spoon since we became a couple. Lately we broke up she told me let's be friends again but I actually didn't see her as friend from the beginning. I told her that I like her after few months of her breaking up with my friend and she said me too but she can't be my girlfriend since I’m a friend of her ex. After a while we became a couple and broke up. In fact we had the first fight over my opinion in marriage I said I don’t believe in marriage and I was joking about that. She got mad and left my place, after one week we came back together and talk about that fight I explain to her that I was joking around and she told me if you don’t believe in marriage I don’t want to waste my time with you. Two weeks after the coming back we broke up again for no reason (she break up with me) she said she's not ready to be in relationship.

I saw her once after 5 days of our breaking up she came to my place as a friend but we were making out I made that move she was OK with being so close to me but she didn’t want me to kiss her. Now I didn't see her for a week she say she loves me and don't want to lose me but she's not ready to be in relationship she thinks also our relationship is unstable. She still wants to be friends

I want to move on and try my luck with another girl but this girl is special to me. We didn't have sex because she doesn't believe in sex before marriage. I don't know if it the sex that makes me think about her and can't forget her or that I really love her. I feel so happy when she's with me I feel like I’m on drugs or something I really enjoy being with her in the same couch hug her and everything else. I think I’m in love!

smkanand
Mar 23, 2013, 03:24 AM
So what, you feel happy when she's around, you are in love. But you also want to get intimate. She is not ready to get intimate. I guess she wants stable relationship and marriage. Or at least engagement. If she is special then you should evaluate your relationship. It's difficult for people to get close to ex of their friends etc. may be she is really expecting commitment from you but you are not ready to give that now. Think again and listen to your instincts. If you really love her and can't afford to loose her then propose her. Good luck.

abram72
Mar 23, 2013, 03:41 AM
I want a stable relationship and maybe marriage too I Just need another a chance!! I really don't want to play with this girl and I'm not really a player. She misunderstood me, and you are right she thinks I'm not ready for commitment. Now I just know that I love her and I need her. I'm just physically sick after the break-up...

smkanand
Mar 23, 2013, 03:48 AM
Don't feel depressed, talk to her and stay as friends and don't be in hurry to express your desire. Let her be friend with you and then go ahead.

abram72
Mar 23, 2013, 03:55 AM
don't feel depressed, talk to her and stay as friends and don't be in hurry to express your desire. let her be friend with you and then go ahead.

That's what I'm thinking to do, hopefully she going to reply to my text tomorrow!

Thank you

talaniman
Mar 23, 2013, 07:48 AM
How long did she date YOUR friend.Often females take longer than 3 months to get beyond their failed relationships. Do you see her ex often? Maybe he is trying to get her back.

The first is always special, but most times its not the only.

abram72
Mar 23, 2013, 09:28 AM
How long did she date YOUR friend.Often females take longer than 3 months to get beyond their failed relationships. Do you see her ex often? Maybe he is trying to get her back.

The first is always special, but most times its not the only.

Her relationship with my friend wasn't that serious I know this guy he didn't even like her. The relationship last for a month or something they didn't sleep together or even kiss like we do me and her they were like friends basically that's why he try to break up with her and she did!! and they don't see each other right now

talaniman
Mar 23, 2013, 11:05 AM
Why can't you take her word that she doesn't want a relationship? I would.

fredg
Mar 23, 2013, 11:09 AM
I would move on to someone else. At 24, and your first love, you have a lot of living to do! I was divorced after 7 yrs of marriage the first time, and this is just a start for you.
Life is not always happy, but we make the best of it. I am sure you will find someone who you can love, and they will love you, too. Good luck. It's very hard just "being friends" with someone you love! Move on.

Zea
Mar 23, 2013, 11:40 AM
What the heck are you talking about?
You said " I don't know if it the sex that makes me think about her and can't forget her or that I really love her."
Lets sort out how you feel first. Here we go: Answer these questions as you read to yourself. You don't have to post a comment though.

Do you love her? If you do then there is no reason for you not to be able to tell her that you love her, and that you expect a future with her.
You said she made you happy when you were together, and without having any sex, how did you enjoy that time with her? Were your thoughts positive and clear about her being the one?

Do you find her physically attractive? If you do, and the only reason you want her is for s.e.x than I don't believe that you truly love her or respect her as a human.

You should know how you feel, use your memories about her and take a trip to remember how you felt, and what opinions you formed about her.

I hope you make the right choices.