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View Full Version : Pregnant 15 year old need paternal divorce physical mental abuse


KaitlynA15
Mar 13, 2013, 11:30 AM
My father has not cared for me, nor been physically living with me for the past 13 months (since February 16, 2012).
3 years ago, my dad was ordered a divorce from his second wife of 9 years, which put him into a depressed state of mind. He was suicidal.
That same year, we moved back to Childress from Pampa because my dads mom had found out from my mom that we were living in a house without electricity, or water.
My eldest brother, who at the time was only 16, made the decision to stay with my mothers parents because he knew that was the best for him, because of my dads unstability.
My dad then had me living with his grandmother, and my other brother, living with my dads mother because of 'financial' reasons, they told us. We were all split apart, which was very hard because we were always there for each other and used to being together, especially through tough times.
My dad was living in Lubbock at this time, trying to go to Academy school to become a cop. We were lucky to see him once a month.
When he gave up on becoming a cop, we were then moved to Shamrock. My oldest brother stayed with my grandma and grandpa, because he did not want to move to a new school as a junior.
We did not have a house, but lived in a camper trailer a couple of miles out of town, for a year. My brother and I shared a bed, as my dad had the back bedroom.
After a long year of these living conditions my dad decided he wanted to move to Huntsville to start a new beginning, and new relationship with a girl that he was in love with 20 years prior.
We moved to Huntsville in early January. I was absolutely miserable. I was 450+ miles away from my family, and everything I had ever known. After a month of living in a trailor house with no furniture, sleeping on the floor, and dealing with my dad leaving me home alone for so many hours every night, I decided I needed to do whatever I had to, to come back home.
February 16, 2012 my dads parents and Tyler drove to Huntsville to pick me up. My dad then left me in Tylers care (him as my guardian). I was to live at my moms parents with Tyler, who at the time was only 18. I lived there until the end of August of 2012, when my brother decided he was going to go off to the Airforce.
My dad then made me start staying at his mothers while he was still in Huntsville. This same time, I found out I was expecting a baby in 7 months.
The past 3 months have been really hard for me. Things at my dads parents house have become more stressful than I ever imagined. I don't feel comfortable there, nor is it an environment for my baby to be in. There are 2 inside dogs, and a cat. It is not a safe, or clean environment for a baby. My grandmother and I do not see eye to eye on anything which has caused tension, because of past arguments. I have suffered problems in my pregnancy because of my stress.
Its almost as if I don't even live there, just stay the night. Every weekend, I am at my moms parents. They are more than willing to open their home to me and my son, and give us a stable environment. Every weekday my moms dad picks me up from my dads parents at 5:30AM, and I stay at their house until 7:45AM. My dads dad then picks me up to take me to school. At 3:17PM I am picked up from school and taken to my moms parents. I stay at their house until 7:30 at night. I then go to my dads parents and stay in my room until the next morning. I dread every minute of being there, or even having to know that I have to go back. I feel like a prisoner being held against my will. Just being in my room, wondering when my dads mom is going to come in and start an argument, causes me great stress.
My dad has shown greatly that he cant, nor does he want, to take care of me. What am I supposed to do, when someone shows you that you aren't wanted? He threatens me that if I try and go against him, he will make sure that I won't be able to see my moms family. I have been living in a blur for the past 12 years, and it is absolutely tearing me apart. He has always made threats to try and decieve my brothers and I, or make us scared to stand up for ourselves to him.
I feel as if I am a puppett, and my dad and his mother are pulling the strings. I don't feel as if I am being treated as a human, let alone an expectant mother. After knowing that I am expecting a baby in 3 weeks, this does not stop them putting the stress on me that they do. They are absolutely decieving and hurtful people. If they don't have their way, they will make your life a black hole. I have put up with this behavior for as long as I can. As a mother, I need to be able to make the absolute best decisions for my son and I, but with this dictatorship of 'parenting' it cannot be possible. I, as a mother, need to be able to protect my son from unnecessary occasions. They're behavior being one of them.
I don't feel as if I have a dad, only a biological father. He has not provided for me, or taken care of me to be able to be called a dad. I have been through
Manipulative and decieving behavior from him for 12 years now.
I know that if I don't fall through with trying everything possible to be released from his noose, I will have a great price to pay.
It does frighten me, to know that it is possible there is nothing I can do. Only because he has been threatening, abusive, or acting to be in the past.
When my brother Colby was little, my dad used to whoop him everyday. Because of the pink slips he would come home with. I remember being in my room crying, because all I could hear was the screams of my brother from the conchos of my dads belt hitting him.
When we were living in Pampa, my dad and brother, Tyler, had gotten into a physical fight because of my dad down grading my mother.
Another incident with my dad and Colby, occurred in Shamrock a year ago, in the camper trailor. My dad was furiated by Colby talking back to him, and attacked Colby. When Colby tried to defend his self my dad got him in a choke hold. I was scared and didn't know what to do. I know that Colby's face was beginning to turn purple and I knew he was close to passing out. I kept yelling for my dad to let go, when finally he did. The next day I realized that underneath Colby's eye he had a purplish red line from where he was losing a great amount of oxygen, as well as a bloodshot eye.
When we were living in Huntsville and I had brought to his attention that I wanted to leave, he raised his fist to me, and in complete honesty thought he was going to hit me. He's backhanded me quite a few times, some harder than others.
My dad was diagnosed with depression and taking medicine because he was suicidal just a few months ago, but he quit taking it and quit going to the doctor, and increased his alcohol intake. He is a very angry person, when proven wrong or when his wrong doings are brought to his attention. I don't know what he is capable of, after being a victim of this depression and quitting his medicine, but I know I don't want me or my son to have to find out.
When my brother, Colby stayed in Huntsville after I left, my dad was very unstable. My brother would call my grandma or mom and ask for money, because they didn't have anything to eat. He had a girlfriend whom he spent all his money on, but couldn't provide for his son, or I when I was there. My brother would constantly call my nonnie for money because my dad didn't have gas to make it to work, or they didn't have food to eat. My brother told my grandma, "We never knew what or where we were gonna eat. We were just going door to door." It absolutely breaks my heart that my dad would put his children, whom you are supposed to love and provide for, through all the things that he has. My dad was living in a trailor house, but when the living conditions were brought to the landlords attention, they left to live with my dads girlfriend and her 2 kids.
After having a fight with his girlfriend, and them splitting up, he moved to an old friend's house who he had lived with when he was younger. My brother still did not have a bed, and was sleeping on the floor. My dad on the couch. My brother said that he had to wake dad up every morning to go to work, and he would get very little sleep to make sure that his dad was never late. My brother rode the bus to and from school. When arriving back at James' after school, Colby stayed in his room, and watched t.v. until my dad arrived from work, within any range from 7-10 at night.
My dad is very unstable with housing, and his mental state of mind. He has told us he was going to kill himself 3-4 times in the past 3 years. After Jennifer left, he drank heavily, and stayed in his room. Colby and I always stayed in Tylers room, because that's where we felt the safest, he was our comfort zone. My dad mentioned to us a couple of months after, " If I wouldn't have sold that gun to Anthony, I wouln't be here right now. Nothing could've saved me." This punctured a hole in my heart. Why weren't his kids good enough for him to live for?
When I was leaving Huntsville, I knew my dad had felt betrayed, but he couldn't provide for me. And I was too young, physically, to be able to provide for myself. I remember asking him to not do anything stupid, that would result in something that he would regret. But he always had it lingering on me, that it was possible that he would kill himself.
After I left, before he went to the doctor, he had texted my friends mother asking her if she could drive to Huntsville and pick up Colby, because he was going to kill himself and didn't want Colby to find him. He gave her the address of my brothers girlfriends house and told her that is where he would be. Completely terrified, and in shock Barbara saved the message and called my dads brother, to tell him what my dad had sent. It was never mentioned to me, anything else that was said after that message.
My dad is not mentally stable. He is sick, and needs help. It is an environment that I cannot be in, because I have someone to protect. I cannot afford to put my son in the environment of unstability, and an environment that could result in something dangerous. I am begging, with everything I have, that something be done about this. I need to be set free from this burden, that is weighing me down.

My dad has already emancipated from being my caregiver, provider, and father, what can I possibly do to be set free from his custody, and to live with my moms parents?

Wondergirl
Mar 13, 2013, 11:40 AM
Where did your pregnancy come from? Who is the father?

Have you reported this to your school counselor?

KaitlynA15
Mar 13, 2013, 11:49 AM
It was unexpected, being only 15.
The father is currently awaiting jail time, but I do not speak to him.

No, I have not talked to my counselor about this, only because I've been trying to do everything I can, as far as legal aspects. I am running out of resources though. I have talked to a judge, lawyers, online lawyers, and CPS. I am in great need of some kind of advice or help.

Wondergirl
Mar 13, 2013, 11:51 AM
No, I have not talked to my counselor about this, only because I've been trying to do everything I can, as far as legal aspects. I am running out of resources though. I have talked to a judge, lawyers, online lawyers, and CPS. I am in great need of some kind of advice or help.
Certainly your school counselor will be able to advise you or will connect you to someone in your community who can help.