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View Full Version : My boyfriend doesn't want to have sex


00Unwanted00
Jan 28, 2013, 11:36 AM
I'm 23 years old and my boyfriend is 35. We've been together for 2 years and before that he had courted me for 3 years. In the beginning of our relationship, we had sex non stop for the first few months. And then it slowed down a lot and now it's almost non-existent. He comes home from work and he's too tired and not in the mood and will give me every excuse in the world as to why we can't have sex. I don't ask him everyday because I don't want to get annoying with it, probably once every two weeks after trying to have sex with him and him rejecting me I will talk to him about it and he'll say the same things... He'll say "tomorrow morning" sometimes and ill be okay with that and then the morning comes and he gets up in the middle of the day to get ready for work... Even on his days off from work which is rare... He won't have sex then either. He just "wants to relax" and it's frustrating for me because I really want to have sex I can't always go so long without it. And it makes me feel rejected and un-wanted. I've tried talking about it outside the bedroom - I don't want to push the subject... If I initiate it he always has an excuse or will stop me from continuing. I feel like I've tried everything. I don't know what to do. It leaves me in tears almost every night when he comes home and doesn't touch me or come near me. Of course he doesn't know that... But he definitely knows my frustration and hasn't done anything about it.

dontknownuthin
Jan 28, 2013, 12:00 PM
Well, you're going to have to make a stronger point that you do not want to be roomates, but want a boyfriend. He may have some reason he is avoiding sex like erectile dysfunction or he may genuinely be too tired. Or he could be working less than you think and be having a satisfying sex life elsewhere.

You need to press him and let him know that he either needs to tell you what's going on and commit to working on it and improving the situation, or you need to leave.

For me, having to ask a man for sex would be really hurtful to my feelings and I don't know how long I'd stick around. I think I'd need to just move on, but if I loved him, I guess I'd make a last-ditch effort before I left.