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View Full Version : My boyfriend has a problem with my past


ZenGurl
Jan 16, 2013, 08:39 PM
My boyfriend of a few months has a problem with my past sexual relationships. He's 29 and I'm 25. I really do care about him and I know he cares just as much. We've grown really close and have fallen completely in love with one another. Everything's great in the relationship except for the fact sometimes he blows up about my past. I've had 3 long term relationships before him but that doesn't seem to bother him. The flings in between bother him the most. I've never had a one night stand but I've had flings that I've told him about. He asked me about my sexual encounters on our second conversation. I didn't go into detail then because I wanted to get to know him, form a connection and trust him before I started telling him about these things. A month into our relationship he asked for details and I began telling him, his reaction though scared me a little. He basically got really upset, asked me why I would do such things and left my house after acting like he was tired. We talked about it numerous times after that and to be honest It's exhausting me a little. He's had relationships in the past and a lot more flings judging by his reaction when I asked him. The women in his past serious relationships apparently didn't have boyfriends before him and one only had one other one before him. The major thing that concerns me is that he's not upset about it hurting him as much as he's concerned about other people possibly telling him things about me. His statement "I won't be hearing about this from other people" causes me this concern. He said he'll try his best to get past this but isn't sure if he can... I don't really know what to do. I don't know if I should stay and bear the possible heart break or leave, heal and move on. Oh the wonders of being human lol.

Fr_Chuck
Jan 16, 2013, 08:52 PM
This is his issue, never should discuss on 2nd date,
And really never iin much detail, he has to be told shut up about it and get over it,
Stop lettimg him bring it up,
If he won't you need stop wasting time on him

odinn7
Jan 17, 2013, 08:32 AM
He's an insecure jerk. This kind of thing should never be brought up and discussed... now he will hold it over you and bring it up any time you get into some kind of argument... and really, it was none of his business to begin with since it all took place before him.

Of course it's up to you but I'm telling you right now that you are better off ending this and moving on before you invest more time and emotions into this relationship... he is not likely to let this go and will probably make you feel guilty about it every chance he gets.

Just search this site for more questions like yours and you will see that there are plenty of guys out there that make a big deal out of this for nothing. Insecurity... that's what it is.