Hello, I'm a 23 year old virgin. I was a pretty popular guy in high school, played 6 A football and wrestled. I was part of the "cool" crowd, which was a large mix of people. I am in decent shape and make friends really easy. I was the quite tough guy with a kind face, one girl told me she did not expect me to be kind hearted and nice.

I wonder if I'm weird?

Why would you be weird? You are an individual. Sex shouldn't be a trophy. It shows you have had some brains. Go take a look at the law boards here and how many unwed fathers there are having to fight for their children or child support.

You are who you are. Don't worry or stress about it.

I was the guy outside of class who would make everyone laugh at my corny jokes, and at my expense. Girls would always come to me with their problems because they knew I would listen without hitting on them, some would call me "dad". I always wanted to find the right girl that I could be friends, love, and be comfortable with. Its not a religious thing, just something from the heart. I'm not waiting for marriage, just for the person. Everyone I know has done away with their virginity, and feeling pressured, if there isn't a tomorrow what I might miss.

All through high school and till this day I have not had a girlfriend, not sure if any girls have been interested in me, horrible with signs unless they are directed to someone else. There is this girl that I'm friends with at work, not sure if she likes me, but I have strong feelings for her for obvious reason. She is kind, beautiful, funny and smart and I feel comfertable yet nervous around her. Is it weird that I'm waiting on the right girl?

Nope. Not weird at all. And as far as the one at work goes just ask her.

Do you date? While waiting for the right girl, date many to help discover that right one.

So one at work, have you asked her for coffee or a dinner?

Putting pressure on yourself just so you can say you have done it isn't going to help the matter. Let it happen naturally. You will be fine. There is no law that says you have to have sex by the time you're 20 or else.

Well... I haven't "Dated" since the 8th grade, but its hard to consider it dateing. Im in no rush mentaly to lose my virginity, I had a chance to in when I was 15 a couple times, but she did not like me for my and there wasn't anything there. She pretty much wanted me as her plaything, I refused and that was the end of it. As for the girl at work, I've known for a year and a half and just kind of fell for her. We talk but Im so nervous yet relaxed. Since she is a friend, Im not sure how to approach her and tell her, w/out making things weird. I want to break the touch barrier to she if she is comfortable, but don't know how to approach that either. Im not sure if she likes, but once I was working and she when down the warehouse isle I was on and just started to talking to me. She will flip the hood on my coat, when she sees me she says my name excitedly. And when I do something for her she will make a heart shape with her fingers and say "love you" or "your the best" but Im not sure if she is just being friendly and when Im by myself in the lunch room she will set right next to me. I don't know if she does that to anyone else or just me, if she does I haven't seen her do it. I was woundering for a while if she was single but wasn't sure, then one day she came to set next to me in a completely empty lunchroom her friend asked her about her boy friend, and it seemed its been a while since they broke up. Any Ideas?

Well...I havent "Dated" since the 8th grade, but its hard to consider it dateing. Im in no rush mentaly to lose my virginity, I had a chance to in when I was 15 a couple times, but she did not like me for my and there wasnt anything there. She pretty much wanted me as her plaything, I refused and that was the end of it. As for the girl at work, I've known for a year and a half and just kinda fell for her. We talk but Im so nervous yet relaxed. Since she is a friend, Im not sure how to approach her and tell her, w/out makeing things weird. I wana break the touch barrier to she if she is comfortable, but dont know how to approach that either. Im not sure if she likes, but once I was working and she when down the warehouse isle I was on and just started to talking to me. She will flip the hood on my coat, when she sees me she says my name excitedly. And when I do something for her she will make a heart shape with her fingers and say "love you" or "your the best" but Im not sure if she is just being friendly and when Im by myself in the lunch room she will set right next to me. I dont know if she does that to anyone else or just me, if she does I havent seen her do it. I was woundering for a while if she was single but wasnt sure, then one day she came to set next to me in a completely empty lunchroom her friend asked her about her boy friend, and it seemed its been a while since they broke up. Any Ideas?

Yes - talk to her. If you think this is someone you want to be with then communicate. But don't approach this as if you are going to no longer be a virgin. Let stuff happen naturally and you will be fine. Ask her out if that is what you want. But if you do this take the pressure off you. Just go to a movie or some place fun as friends until you see where this might go.

Yes - talk to her. If you think this is someone you want to be with then communicate. But don't approach this as if you are going to no longer be a virgin. Let stuff happen naturally and you will be fine. Ask her out if that is what you want. But if you do this take the pressure off of you. Just go to a movie or some place fun as friends until you see where this might go.
Im not thinking about sex, when I talk with her, so my virginity is not on my mind only her. Finding the appropriate time, place, and words is currently my problem. I' ve liked and had crushes before that I did nothing and regreted not trying, but this is different I feel like I never have around her, so I don't want to regret this. I've got to ask her!. just... hard, shouldn't be, but is.

Im not thinking about sex, when I talk with her, so my virginity is not on my mind only her. Finding the appropriate time, place, and words is currently my problem. I' ve liked and had crushes before that I did nothing and regreted not trying, but this is different I feel like I never have around her, so I dont want to regret this. I've gotta ask her!....just....hard, shouldnt be, but is.

Well you have a choice. Ask her out and get to know her. Or don't and continue living the life you have now. It sounds like you don't want to do this, but if you decide that talking to her is too hard, deciding to continue the life you have now will be your choice.

Here's the thing: The first time you talk to her is only hard for the first few words. Then it won't be hard. The first time you go on a date it's only hard at the very beginning. You will probably find out that you were missing a good time all this time. Even if the date went badly you could still be proud of yourself that you did something different and new. And that will build yourself confidence.

Good luck!

Well you have a choice. Ask her out and get to know her. Or don't and continue living the life you have now. It sounds like you don't want to do this, but if you decide that talking to her is too hard, deciding to continue the life you have now will be your choice.

Here's the thing: The first time you talk to her is only hard for the first few words. Then it won't be hard. The first time you go on a date it's only hard at the very beginning. You will probably find out that you were missing a good time all this time. Even if the date went badly you could still be proud of yourself that you did something different and new. And that will build your self confidence.

Good luck!!

Thank you that helps! Now, from the things I've said of how she treats me, does it seem like she likes me more then a friend? Also today as I was walking out of work she was on her way in, didn't see her at first until she said hi, I kept peering back and saw her looking back multipul times from the glass enrance. I kind of giggled and smiled, any ideas?

Ask her out!! It sounds like she's just waiting for this.

Ask her out!!!!! It sounds like she's just waiting for this.
:) OK

Of course, you will have to keep us informed. :D

Of course, you will have to keep us informed. :D

Will do

Yyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy!!

Yyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy!!!!!
I was thinking about taking her by both hands and pulling her to the side, should I tell her how I feel? Or just simply ask her for coffee, there is a Starbucks inside so that can be our 1st date.

No, don't tell her how you feel, not yet. SHOW her how you feel, the way you have been doing, with smiles and looking back and little expressions. It isn't a leap into new territory so much as it is a slow walk. Starbucks sounds good, but you could also bring her a little something you made yourself, like a drawing or a flower you picked or a cookie you baked or a short poem.

No, don't tell her how you feel, not yet. SHOW her how you feel, the way you have been doing, with smiles and looking back and little expressions. It isn't a leap into new territory so much as it is a slow walk. Starbucks sounds good, but you could also bring her a little something you made yourself, like a drawing or a flower you picked or a cookie you baked or a short poem.
Sounds good, thanks.

sounds good, thanks.

I totally agree with joypulv. Don't rush things, don't put pressure on yourself, and also I think even though you might not feel confident, show her some confidence.

Remember, let the relationship happen naturally. You don't need to talk about what you are going to get each other for your 50th wedding anniversary on your first date. Just be yourself and have a good time.

Also remember everyone is nervous at first. I am dating someone right now who I never would have thought would have given me a second, let alone give me their heart. So I was very nervous. But it gets easier as you get to know the person.

And heck yes you need to report back to us.

There is nothing at all weird about being 23 and a virgin,sex over the years has lost its meaning, people hand out their virginity way to easily, don't force it to happen or it will become a regret for you, be the very few that don't regret there first time. Hold of until the right person comes along, it will have so much more meaning and will be worth the wait... I wish I had, consider yourself lucky because because you still have the most preciois gift you could share with another human being... never think your weird, your smart. :)

Well yesterday I was excited and confident, If she would like to join me for coffee or tea, but we were both swamped, me in the backroom , and her at guest services.
I was wanting take her away from it all for a moment, and make her day better if for just a moment. Saddly.. I didn't get a lunch or breaks. So I guess I will wait till Monday.

No worries, the time and opportunity will eventually come. Patience.

Well today I got her some boxes she asked for to put defective items in. She was happy I took the time to do it. Then I decided to check out a key that I already had, I looked for a pen just to find 3 in the notebook, I made a joke as she finished with a customer. I was leaning over trying to use 2 pens at once. She leaned over on the other side talking to me as I drew a bunny, I looked up and she was right there looking at what I was doing. I felt her breth on my sholder

My heart stared beating fast, and I felt something between us, some type of connection I think... then a guest came up... and she had to go attend to them... still not sure if she likes me but I think I felt something.

Of course you did as you already have feelings.

Of course you did as you already have feelings.
It was almost as if I felt what she felt, like there was a lot of sexual tention, but we tried to play coy if that makes sense. I was about to ask her out but I kina had to gather my bearing because the tenstion had gotten the better of the ohysical me. Just when I was ready the guest came up.

It was almost as if I felt what she felt, like there was alot of sexual tention, but we tried to play coy if that makes sense. I was about to ask her out but I kina had to gather my bearing because the tenstion had gotten the better of the ohysical me. Just when I was ready the guest came up.
OK, I know this isn't the biggest leap in the world but for me it's huge, but I went to sign keys in at the guest service didn't have any but hoped to see her. Well she saw me and came over, I wished her a Marry Christmas, the she asked " no hug?" I went around and gave her a firm but gental hug, lol can't remember much except the harmth. Little creepy I know. But it was a large leap for me. I should have went from the hug to her hands and asked her out.

Ask for her phone number.

OK, I know this isnt the biggest leap in the world but for me it's huge, but I went to sign keys in at the guest service didnt have any but hoped to see her. Well she saw me and came over, I wished her a Marry Christmas, the she asked " no hug?" I went around and gave her a firm but gental hug, lol can't remember much except the harmth. Little creepy I know. But it was a large leap for me. I should have went from the hug to her hands and asked her out.

Okay now what? Are you going to ask her on a date or watch her go on a date with someone else because you waited too long? Again - the expectations of the date are you two are going to learn more about each other - not jump into bed the first night. Get her number and ask her to a movie or something.