So, I have a pretty serious problem and don't know what to do/say to my best friend since childhood. We are both married, stay-at-home moms. Being a stay-at-home mom is no where NEAR glamorous and can get pretty crazy, hectic, dysfunctional etc. I get that. However, my best friend admits to and even says in front of her own children that she hates them. According to her husband, she doesn't cook or clean, and expects him to do ALL of the housework daily. He works 2 jobs and works about 18 hours a day. When I am at her house, she NEVER plays with her kids, and sits on her couch using her phone. Whenever either of her kids wants to cuddle with her or wants her attention, she screams at them, pulls her hair, calls them names like retard, moron, idiot, get a life, leave me the alone, I need space etc. All the while, she has given them zero attention all day long but yet "needs space". It's sick and deranged. Her and her husband have an awful marriage. Constant fighting over these issues and so on. Her and her kids are now staying with me due to a recent fight they had. Since she's been here, she has not changed her daughter's diaper in 9 hours. Her daughter is 1 year old! She has been sitting on her on our couch for 2 days straight and has not helped me clean, cook, or anything. She leaves dirty dishes in the sink, let's the kids spill drinks and get crumbs on my floor etc. and has not gotten off her butt once to help pick up. Just today, her daughter was begging for her attention. Her response? She screams at the top of her lungs "leave me the alone" she grabs her as hard as she can and squeezes her causing her to scream, then says get a life you whore! She is only 1 year old!! Her son is going on 5, and she is constantly putting him down. Anytime he cries or needs something she says "do it yourself", or "why do you always cry like a little girl?" Never once has she embraced her crying children and nurtured them instead of treating them constantly as a burden, and never getting off her to do ANYTHING! I don't know what to do or say. Please help!

You say this is your best friend. A true friend would put her in her place. You can do this but not in a mean way. You knew she wasn't doing anything to help out at her home why would she do anything to help out at yours. The children need some one to stand up for them If you just stand by and watch her abuse them that asif your taking part in it . Me personally I would talk to her and ask her why does she talk to her kids like that. Their kids for christ sake. They have no security from her or their father. Children need love and obviously she doesn't have any in her to give them. I would let her know I love you but I really don't like the way you handle your kids. Of course she's probably going to lash out on you as well but your not a child and can stand up for yourself. She sounds very selfish an inmature. Which is the type of person who doesn't need to raise or teach children. She's going to need those children one day when she gets old and they are going to do exactly to her what she's doing to them yell at her and hit her and shake her and let her sit in her poop and take her to a home and never go back to get her. This women doesn't need these children if she going to continue to abuse them. Behavior like this is usually a cycle I bet you her mom treated her the way she's treating her kids. Please stand up for those kids, even though it may mean losing her as a friend. If she treats her own children this way I would question if she even know what a friend is. If she doesn't want to listen to reason I would call social service on her or record her the way she treats her kid for proof.

People have goon to jail for mistreating dogs why should it be any different for mistreating children??