CurlyQueue
Oct 2, 2012, 06:46 PM
I'm married, so let's get that out of the way first. An unhappy, abusive marriage that I'm trying to get out of.
I met a man online a few years back. Over the past while, we became very close (or so I thought). We would talk every day on the phone, and have met in person a few times. He was the one person I wanted to share things with, and truly, I felt he was my best friend.
The last time we met, we ended up sleeping together, and it was, by far, the most amazing I've felt in my life. He said the same, and told me he loved me. He lives 500 miles away from me, so it isn't as though we can see each other all the time. I have regrets now, because I cheated.
A couple months ago, about a month after we'd last met face to face, we were talking on the phone, and he said "I love you, but am not in love with you." I said I felt the same. I love him, but it wasn't an "in love" thing because we have not spent enough time together for me to feel that way, and with the baggage of my marriage, well, "falling in love" wasn't an option for me.
The next day, we had a bit of an argument. It ended with him saying that I was denying my feelings for him... that I was mad that he wasn't in love with me. No matter how much I protested, he maintained that it was me denying my feelings, and finally he hung up on me.
I tried calling him back. Left messages on his voicemail. Texts. No reply. A few weeks ago, I tried texting again, after he had left a comment on one of my Facebook photos, telling me he thought I looked beautiful. He called that night to tell me again that I was denying my feelings for him, and he wasn't interested in being friends anymore.
I think it's odd he called.It seems weird--he'd been ignoring me for nearly two months--why the call?
I am so brokenhearted. I don't know what to do. I shouldn't have slept with him, I know. But I really miss my friend. I want him back. I want to talk to him again. Is there anything I can do?
I also think that maybe it was HIM denying his feelings? Or maybe both of us?
I met a man online a few years back. Over the past while, we became very close (or so I thought). We would talk every day on the phone, and have met in person a few times. He was the one person I wanted to share things with, and truly, I felt he was my best friend.
The last time we met, we ended up sleeping together, and it was, by far, the most amazing I've felt in my life. He said the same, and told me he loved me. He lives 500 miles away from me, so it isn't as though we can see each other all the time. I have regrets now, because I cheated.
A couple months ago, about a month after we'd last met face to face, we were talking on the phone, and he said "I love you, but am not in love with you." I said I felt the same. I love him, but it wasn't an "in love" thing because we have not spent enough time together for me to feel that way, and with the baggage of my marriage, well, "falling in love" wasn't an option for me.
The next day, we had a bit of an argument. It ended with him saying that I was denying my feelings for him... that I was mad that he wasn't in love with me. No matter how much I protested, he maintained that it was me denying my feelings, and finally he hung up on me.
I tried calling him back. Left messages on his voicemail. Texts. No reply. A few weeks ago, I tried texting again, after he had left a comment on one of my Facebook photos, telling me he thought I looked beautiful. He called that night to tell me again that I was denying my feelings for him, and he wasn't interested in being friends anymore.
I think it's odd he called.It seems weird--he'd been ignoring me for nearly two months--why the call?
I am so brokenhearted. I don't know what to do. I shouldn't have slept with him, I know. But I really miss my friend. I want him back. I want to talk to him again. Is there anything I can do?
I also think that maybe it was HIM denying his feelings? Or maybe both of us?