Found text Msg from my husband to his supposed to be Ex mistress.It read from him first how are you? She replied she's fine.He said he was just checking on her making sure she's good.She said oh OK thanks.Him: your welcome no problem..
It sound innocent but what you think and what was the point?

Where did you find this message?

In his cell while he was out jogging.

Given the fact that there was nothing innocent about you snooping, while he innocently left his phone around, and he never took the effort to delete the text, it is in your interest to let it go as NOTHING. Opening up this can of worms will do nothing good. It will all come back on you.

It doesn't even sound like they have had any contact in quite a while. What's wrong with wondering how someone is? I wonder about every single person I was ever involved with, and at my age, that's several.

Found text Msg from my husband to his supposed to be Ex mistress.It read from him first how are you? She replied she's fine.He said he was just checking on her making sure she's good.She said oh OK thanks.Him: your welcome no problem..
It sound innocent but what you think and what was the point?

Lisa, how long have you been married? Your other threads are all over the place so I am not going to try to untangle that knot by myself.

What I will advise on what you have said here is that you need counseling. Snooping is a sign of not trusting your partner. You don't trust him so either you give up the relationship or you work on allowing trust to rebuild.

Ok you guys are on whooping.he contacted his mistress.the text is nit old it just happened there's dates on text.The fact he contacted nit an ex girlfriend but a mistress he was supposed to have given io but you guys are in snooping.Sorry he didn't purposely leave his phone it fell out his sweat jacket he thought he had with him.So no I heard text noise so I picked up his phone off the floor and her name loops up innocent.

Ok you guys are on whooping.he contacted his mistress.the text is nit old it just happened there's dates on text.The fact he contacted nit an ex girlfriend but a mistress he was supposed to have given io but you guys are in snooping.Sorry he didn't purposely leave his phone it fell out his sweat jacket he thought he had with him.So no I heard text noise so I picked up his phone off of the floor and her name loops up innocent.

But you didn't have to read what it said. You made a choice to view the texts which means that you don't trust him enough to ask him what is going on. Instead you are asking us if the exchange was innocent.

Like I said, I looked back over your past threads and posts. It is such a tangled mess that I don't know when you stopped being the other woman and married this man who you don't fully trust.

How long have the two of you been married? How long ago was he supposed to 'have given her up'?

Ok you guys are on whooping.he contacted his mistress.the text is nit old it just happened there's dates on text.The fact he contacted nit an ex girlfriend but a mistress he was supposed to have given io but you guys are in snooping.Sorry he didn't purposely leave his phone it fell out his sweat jacket he thought he had with him.So no I heard text noise so I picked up his phone off of the floor and her name loops up innocent.


Color it any way you like - he dropped his phone, you picked it up and read the message. What you quoted is more than a couple of words.

Your posts are all over the place. I truly have no idea what's going on.

Do you?

Let me quote the last time I answered you:

"Do you have a question?

You've posted this before and ignored all advice - what is different this time around? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/marriag...er-670114.html

You have issues in your life - your posts tell different stories. I have no idea what is real and what is not. I don't know if you do.

Here are some samples: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-s...n-653739.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-s...t-651936.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating/...s-650777.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating/...n-650370.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/marriag...s-650006.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/marriag...s-649959.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/childre...y-649352.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relatio...l-649085.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating/...s-648979.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relatio...k-646077.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/other-f...m-606237.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relatio...d-601633.html; https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-s...ou-600970.html

I think the answer might be whether your lover finding another woman would bother you. To quote you: "My lover than gets up throws away his trash turns to me and the other guy and offers to throw his trash away. ... Maybe I'm reading to much into this but even during sex few times we both I admit just gaze into each other eyes." (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-sexuality/when-sexual-partner-stares-you-600970.html[/url])"

Ok you guys are on whooping.he contacted his mistress.the text is nit old it just happened there's dates on text.The fact he contacted nit an ex girlfriend but a mistress he was supposed to have given io but you guys are in snooping.Sorry he didn't purposely leave his phone it fell out his sweat jacket he thought he had with him.So no I heard text noise so I picked up his phone off of the floor and her name loops up innocent.
It is an innocent conversation. You shouldn't be checking up on someone you trust. When my husband's cell rings or beeps and he's not in the room, I either take him the phone or tell him I heard it. I never look at who it is. That's snooping.

It is an innocent conversation. You shouldn't be checking up on someone you trust. When my husband's cell rings or beeps and he's not in the room, I either take him the phone or tell him I heard it. I never look at who it is. That's snooping.


There's a long history behind this question. It's either not real OR the OP enjoys playing the victim.

You will notice that she divorced her husband last October - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/what-part-affair-easy-end-601633.html

Not sure why your posting but this story is about him contacting his mistress.Of coarse if he cheated had an AFFAIR I'm going to loom at his phone. DUH

The message means nothing, but your posts that appear to be different men and different issues tells another story

I think you have serious problems.
Get some counseling.

My hubby is cheating but I have no right to snoopy.oh OK great advice.

My hubby is cheating but I have no right to snoopy.oh ok great advice.

You still haven't said how long you have been married. How long ago did he supposedly break off their relationship?

You made the choice at some point in time to marry him and keep him no matter when the 'cheating' occurred. With that choice came the responsibility to put the past behind you and work on your relationship and trust with him.

If you do not trust him, why are you with him? If you do trust him, why not ask him about what you read?

Counseling or divorce seem to be your main options at this point.

As I keep saying, I have read your other threads about cheating. I can't help but wonder if he did cheat or if you are looking for him to be unfaithful because of your own past.

If you can't work or communicate with him about what you saw and how you found it, then your relationship is doomed.

I don't see anything in that message that suggested cheating. My ex will text to check on me from time to time. I do the same with him and we have no desire to cheat with each other.
You sound paranoid.

My hubby is cheating but I have no right to snoopy.oh ok great advice.

I have no sympathy nor do I have empathy for you. If he IS a cheater, then YOU chose to stay with him.

If you feel the need to snoop, well then your relationship is doomed!

Obviously there are a lot of inconsistencies in your other posts for members to not only question, but post as well.

I, however, did not read any other threads, only this one, and judging by this thread, I would say you were in the wrong for snooping. But if he is cheating or has in the past, well then, that's all on you. Why? Because you continued to be with him.

I have no sympathy nor do I have empathy for you. If he IS a cheater, then YOU chose to stay with him.

If you feel the need to snoop, well then your relationship is doomed!

Obviously there are a lot of inconsistencies in your other posts for members to not only question, but post as well.

I, however, did not read any other threads, only this one, and judging by this thread, I would say you were in the wrong for snooping. But if he is cheating or has in the past, well then, that's all on you. Why? Because you continued to be with him.



In the October threads, much of the same info, she divorced him. OP is here to argue, not for advice. Same thing on all the other threads. I'm not sure there is a cell phone - or a husband, for that matter.

Hmm... I'm wondering if there really was a divorce? Maybe this is the same husband?

Honey bun I'm married

Honey bun I'm married

To who? Did you remarry the husband you divorced in October, or is this a new guy?

Honey bun I'm married


Please don't call me honey bun. Maybe it's your style. It's not mine.

It's also dismissive and disrespectful - although I'm really not surprised.

So you have remarried since October and this new husband also has a mistress?

Please don't call me honey bun. Maybe it's your style. It's not mine.

It's also dismissive and disrespectful - although I'm really not surprised.

So you have remarried since October and this new husband also has a mistress?

Perhaps the husband's mistress enjoys being called "honey bun" while indulging in some hot hate sex!

I read ALL your old posts. One thing that strikes me is that they are all questions that have no answers. They are childish and simple, like why does he stare at me when having sex, and I never would answer any of them because all I could say would be 'How would I know?' Plus you give no background to any of them, so here you are asking about suspicions about contacting an ex, after casually bringing up a 2 year fling last fall, and then brushing it off as 'just once a month.' It sounds like a shallow and meaningless existence to me.

I read ALL your old posts. One thing that strikes me is that they are all questions that have no answers. They are childish and simple, like why does he stare at me when having sex, and I never would answer any of them because all I could say would be 'How would I know?' Plus you give no background to any of them, so here you are asking about suspicions about contacting an ex, after casually bringing up a 2 year fling last fall, and then brushing it off as 'just once a month.' It sounds like a shallow and meaningless existence to me.


I agree - but I believe posting on AMHD fulfills some need, emotional, whatever. There has to be a reason why OP continues to come back to AMHD posting info which makes no sense.

I'm thinking it's a made up existence. I think OP can't keep her stories straight - married, husband has mistress, divorced, married, husband has mistress.

Not in real life, not since last October.

Honey bun I'm married

Notice that OP cannot focus - repeats the same thing.

I also note a great variation in writing style - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/children/being-too-petty-649352.html.

Alty, may I quote you?: "https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relatio...rk-646077.html

Seeing as this thread was started less than 6 months ago, and you claimed that your husband started cheating on you a year ago, well, what comes around goes around. You've been cheating for over 2 years according to the above post, and with a married man. It's hard to feel bad for you when you're doing to another woman the very thing you claim was done to you. And it's also pretty evident that you started your affair before your husband cheated on you. Even if he didn't, you're still a home wrecker."

Something isn't right.

Going through therapy for my husbands long term 3yr sex fling.Which can be salvage because it was only sex.I know everything. Him holding her hands and locking.Kissing before intercourse and performing oral for three yrs.I know she feels used because that's what he did.She feels lonely and used.I think now we can move on.I can forgive him for this mistake but our marriage is built on love. Can this be saved.