I don't know where to ask this... I was hoping maybe an OBGYN could answer some of my questions so I'm hoping maybe a couple are around here?


I was dating a woman for a very short period (ok let’s call it what it was, a short fling)… And a couple of weeks later she texted me to tell me that she was pregnant. I asked to see a test (politely) and she sent me an image of a test as being positive.


Anyway she told me that she didn’t want to go through with the pregnancy and that she was on a medication that would cause her to miscarriage unless she stopped taking it. Apparently she talked to her OBGYN and confirmed that simply continuing to take this mysterious medication (she never told me what it was) would cause her to miscarry the pregnancy early on. So apparently that is what she did. In fact one night shortly after that she called me in a lot of pain and even asked if I had some prescription pain killers because she was hurting so bad. (This girl wasn’t a drug addict or anything like that.)


So apparently after experiencing this pain and bleeding she went back to the OB and was told that the pregnancy had aborted. We didn’t talk after that, and from what I understand she met someone soon after that and fell in love.


I came across her Facebook page months later and found pictures of her with a newborn baby in a hospital. I looked back at some of the emails we exchanged months prior only to find that it had just barley been nine months since the “incident” that I described above. I confronted her on Facebook because it was the only way I had to contact her anymore and she didn’t reply. So I let it go, thinking that maybe she just got pregnant again right after the fact, with this other guy that she is with now. But still, I have drawn out a timeline and it just doesn’t seem like there was time for that… And I have this lingering suspicion that I might be a father…. Now it has been about 2yrs, and I have gone off to graduate school in another state many miles away. At this point, I can’t even find her on Facebook anymore or remember her last name. But I still think about how bizarre this whole experience has been. You could day that it has changed my perspective on frivolous dating for life.


So my question is, from an OBGYN’s perspective would the things that she said about her OB make sense? Would an OB be OK with her continuing to take a medication that will end a pregnancy? Does such a medication exist? It seems to me like an OB would instead want to put her on a medication which has the sole purpose of ending a pregnancy, rather than relying on the side effects of some other medication to do the job..

The way I see it, there are a few possible scenario’s:

-She told me the truth and this mysterious medication that she was too embarrassed to tell me about aborted her pregnancy and she got pregnant again soon after and had a somewhat pre-mature baby. (Because according to my timeline I just don’t think that there would be time for her to get pregnant again and go full term)

-She kept the baby and for whatever reason does not want me involved in her life (Honestly this scenario is fine with me, it is just the curiosity that kills me)

- Her OB prescribed her an abortion pill and she didn’t want to tell me she was actually having an abortion. Of course, this scenario assumes that she got pregnant again right afterword’s.


-She was sleeping with several people and found out the baby was not mine…?

I don’t know, I really don’t…. But this whole scenario really bugs me even to this day. I wonder if I'm going to meet a young adult in 20yrs that wants to find her or his real father… I’m in a committed, long term relationship now and I'm paranoid that all of the sudden I'm going to find out that I have a kid and it’s going to mess everything up with her. I haven’t told her about any of this..

Does anyone have any insight or advice for me?

I don't know where to ask this... I was hoping maybe an OBGYN could answer some of my questions so im hoping maybe a couple are around here?

I was dating a woman for a very short period of time (ok let’s call it what it was, a short fling)… And a couple of weeks later she texted me to tell me that she was pregnant. I asked to see a test (politely) and she sent me an image of a test as being positive.

Anyway she told me that she didn’t want to go through with the pregnancy and that she was on a medication that would cause her to miscarriage unless she stopped taking it. Apparently she talked to her OBGYN and confirmed that simply continuing to take this mysterious medication (she never told me what it was) would cause her to miscarry the pregnancy early on. So apparently that is what she did. In fact one night shortly after that she called me in a lot of pain and even asked if I had some prescription pain killers because she was hurting so bad. (This girl wasn’t a drug addict or anything like that.)

So apparently after experiencing this pain and bleeding she went back to the OB and was told that the pregnancy had aborted. We didn’t talk after that, and from what I understand she met someone soon after that and fell in love.

I came across her facebook page months later and found pictures of her with a newborn baby in a hospital. I looked back at some of the emails we exchanged months prior only to find that it had just barley been nine months since the “incident” that I described above. I confronted her on Facebook because it was the only way I had to contact her anymore and she didn’t reply. So I let it go, thinking that maybe she just got pregnant again right after the fact, with this other guy that she is with now. But still, I have drawn out a timeline and it just doesn’t seem like there was time for that… And I have this lingering suspicion that I might be a father…. Now it has been about 2yrs, and I have gone off to graduate school in another state many miles away. At this point, I can’t even find her on facebook anymore or remember her last name. But I still think about how bizarre this whole experience has been. You could day that it has changed my perspective on frivolous dating for life.

So my question is, from an OBGYN’s perspective would the things that she said about her OB make sense? Would an OB be ok with her continuing to take a medication that will end a pregnancy?? Does such a medication exist?? It seems to me like an OB would instead want to put her on a medication which has the sole purpose of ending a pregnancy, rather than relying on the side effects of some other medication to do the job..

The way I see it, there are a few possible scenario’s:

-She told me the truth and this mysterious medication that she was too embarrassed to tell me about aborted her pregnancy and she got pregnant again soon after and had a somewhat pre-mature baby. (Because according to my timeline I just don’t think that there would be time for her to get pregnant again and go full term)

-She kept the baby and for whatever reason does not want me involved in her life (Honestly this scenario is fine with me, it is just the curiosity that kills me)

- Her OB prescribed her an abortion pill and she didn’t want to tell me she was actually having an abortion. Of course, this scenario assumes that she got pregnant again right afterword’s.

-She was sleeping with several people and found out the baby was not mine…?

I don’t know, I really don’t…. But this whole scenario really bugs me even to this day. I wonder if im going to meet a young adult in 20yrs that wants to find her or his real father… I’m in a committed, long term relationship now and im paranoid that all of the sudden im going to find out that I have a kid and it’s going to mess everything up with her. I haven’t told her about any of this..

Does anyone have any insight or advice for me?


There is absolutely no way to know without asking her.

Yes, some medication can harm the fetus, including miscarriages.

Other than that any and all scenarios are possible.

You, of course, should have handled the issue when you saw her on FB. Now, unless you remember her name, you are only guessing.

I wouldn't obsess about it - there's little you can do.

Tell your long-term partner? I don't know her. You do. Depends on what you think her reaction might be.

I'm a little hung up on girlfriend #1 calling you for pain pills - ?