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View Full Version : What should I do? Is this normal?


WL28
Mar 7, 2007, 02:58 AM
Hi. I have questions regarding my mental and emotional state. I am 20 years old, almost 21. About 8 months ago, my ex girlfriend broke up with me. We had been dating for almost 3 years, and had an incredible relationship going. She was my high school sweetheart. She broke up with me for reasons that I don't fully understand... And months later, I find that she has turned into a completely and entirely different person. When we were dating, she was very nice and loving... she's now very mean spirited, heading nowhere, rejecting all her old family and friends, etc.. . as far as I know.
Anyhow, I had nothing to do with making the break up worst... I really hadn't seen it coming. And I did everything I could that I thought was right to improve things. I even tried to offer help afterwards and support. And I know I sound like everyone else by saying this, but I really did care, love, and sacrifice for her in every way the best I could when I was with her. Regardless, she refuses to have anything to do with me.
8 months later now, I'm still hurting about as much as I did when we broke up... a day doesn't go by that I don't miss her, think about her, or reflect on the past and how good it used to be. Life really in general hasn't had the same spark it used to have. I think I over fantasize and romanticize about the past, and consider how great it'd be if I could go back.
I guess I'm a hopeless romantic, and although I'm still young, I feel like I still want to marry her, as if she was it. I am so willing to forgive and I feel very bad for her because I know she's still a sweetheart underneath, but maybe I'm giving her too much credit.
Is this normal? I feel very empty all the time and sad. Occasionally, I can forget, but overall, this rules my life... do I need special help or counseling? Can anyone help me with this? Sorry this is so long, I just am hoping someone can empathize with me and give me advice. Please help if you can. It's hard to "hang in there". Thanks for reading and caring

Capuchin
Mar 7, 2007, 03:04 AM
Hi, I know how you feel, it's very hard to let go.

I think 8 months is starting to get on for a long time, while you will never forget her, you should start to be reaching a stage where you feel better about moving on without her in your life. If you are not approaching that place yet, maybe counseling would be a good investment.

You are at the peak of your youth and need to be getting out there and interact with people without this burden hanging over you.

How much contact have you had with her over the past 8 months?