I was at work one night and my husband text me telling me not to worry but a female friend of his was coming over to hang out. He said that she was lonely and that nobody would talk to her after she had left her ex. Her ex and my husband were in a band together about 1yr ago and it has been over six months since he was in this band. The girl and my husband hadn't talked in six months and then on July 21st she called him out of the blue. Well, I was at work until approx 8. I went home and I knew something had happened. Two days later he confesses to kissing her. We argue and he decides he wants a divorce. This was on a Monday night. She continues to call him while he is at home and will not back off and let us deal with the things that we need to. He later confesses that it was making out instead of just a kiss.
His mother steps in on the following Wednesday and recommends separation instead of divorce and he has now moved out to her property to care for it while she is caring for her elderly parents. Or will be come October. My husband and I had sex the whole week he was still here and the week after.
He is a good man and we had lost the means of communication in our relationship. We are now talking again. He has been honest with me and very upfront about the things that I need to know about. It hasn't even been a month since she popped back up into his life and now they are in a steady relationship... This kills me. I still love him and I am in love with him. I hate that when he went to her house on August 17th (Friday) they had sex. I asked him and he was honest with me. I finally got to see him live his dream last night of playing up on a stage for the first time. I feel like the only way that I was able to go was if he went and appeased her that there was nothing to worry about by having sex with her.
The most confusing part is that he hugs, and touches me still, no sex but we kiss on the cheek and he still holds me. Yet he tells me that he's not in love with me and those feelings are just gone. Then he turns around and tells me that he loves me and cares about my feelings and isn't trying to hurt me. I do believe that he isn't trying to do me damage. I just wish I could believe him when he says he is not in love with me anymore. We have small children and I have kept the house and my car. He has taken some of the furniture and his musical equipment. He has only moved the things that I have packed up for him. He still comes to my house and uses the internet (his really sucks) and all the bills get sent here still. He is paying those too for the time being so that I can find a job that pays more and has more hours. Child care is my area so I am also dealing with that. I guess my question is not what I should do, because I can't honestly cut those ties right now. I miss him dearly and I want to know what the opinion is. Is he just confused and maybe going through a "grass is greener" phase. Oh, it had only been less than a month after leaving her ex before this woman had contacted my husband. They now talk all the time. I am dying inside because I can't stop being in love with and loving my husband. I guess I should call him my ex but we aren't divorced yet. I just wish I knew how to let him go and if that is what he really wants.

Oh, we would have been married 6yr and together for 7+ this October.