hawker127
Aug 6, 2012, 10:36 AM
Hi there,
So I've been dating this girl for around 8 months now, everything was great in the relationship, great sex, we enjoyed each others company and on the hole just had a good time, over the last 2-3 months though I could feel her pulling out slightly which inevitably made me do what most guys shouldn't, and tried to chase her, not being myself always showering her with the nice guy routine. I mean I'm a caring person its just my nature and she never communicated with me about her emotions or problems, she was always a fairly closed book.
I tried being the polite guy with her family, got on with her brothers and parents who were so great! She gets on with my family to. The last discussion I brought up with her was about this distance and weirdness I felt she was being towards me. I also like to mention I had invited her to come out on holiday for 2 weeks with me and my family and this is what she said. "yeh it hasn't been working for the last 2 months has it?" so I was like no but I want to turn this whole thing round. She just didn't sound convincing and I felt like in the time before the holiday we were about to go on that I was fighting a losing battle. She never made time to see me! I didn't feel wanted, appreciated at all and so I pulled myself out slightly so I didn't get hurt. She went on holiday before on this amazing holiday with her friends that you can't really beat, clubs and boat party's every night, I felt slightly paranoid I have to admit!
That she would cheat on me. But I stayed calm, tol her to have a great time etc. and she kept texting me back saying stuff like never been this drunk before having the most insane time! Anyway not too important, so were on holiday with my family now and she wasn't even exited to see me at all!
So I tried just being nice and fun and playful to take the awkwardness out of the situation and it worked, we started doing stuff together, hanging out, not much laughing but smiling. We went having any sex though and I wasn't forcing it on her for that reason! I thought that we had to get right first before the sex came so I was focused on that mainly! I then saw a text she left open to her friend that was on holiday with her saying she feels like I'm a best friend rather than a boyfriend! So I was like what the!! And why would you leave that out? So I started looking through her texts to other guys and it was like with this one guy that I know she kind of liked that was saying stuff like where are you tonight xx? Or wish you were her in the club or place we are.. always... 's. I didn't want to think anything of it, and chose to just trust her.
When I brought up the convocation though on how we were doing she told me crying that she still really loved me so much and thought I was the nicest guy in the world and she cared for me and didn't want to hurt me but said she didn't have any lust or feelings for me anymore. My god did this hurt! I loved this girl so much! we are still on holiday and have 7 days to go and I don't know how to play this. I wish I could get her to fall in love with me again but I doesn't work that way right, you can't do anything!
I decided to break up with her and just let her go at the end of the holiday, I told her I didn't like seeing her like this and that I just wanted her to be happy! But secretly I really want her back but don't know how to get her to want to come back to me? How would I get her to fall in love with me again? Is it possible to fall in love with someone all over again? Or not really? I am going to move on and do things like my skydiving licence, motor biking licence like I wanted to, and now I don't have a girlfriend anymore I can focus on having fun with just my mates being stupid and achieving stuff that will make me feel good about myself again.
What would you do in this situation though. I want her to want me again and have that lust we used to have but don't know how to get her to feel that way for me again. If you have any suggestions or advice I could really use some.
So I've been dating this girl for around 8 months now, everything was great in the relationship, great sex, we enjoyed each others company and on the hole just had a good time, over the last 2-3 months though I could feel her pulling out slightly which inevitably made me do what most guys shouldn't, and tried to chase her, not being myself always showering her with the nice guy routine. I mean I'm a caring person its just my nature and she never communicated with me about her emotions or problems, she was always a fairly closed book.
I tried being the polite guy with her family, got on with her brothers and parents who were so great! She gets on with my family to. The last discussion I brought up with her was about this distance and weirdness I felt she was being towards me. I also like to mention I had invited her to come out on holiday for 2 weeks with me and my family and this is what she said. "yeh it hasn't been working for the last 2 months has it?" so I was like no but I want to turn this whole thing round. She just didn't sound convincing and I felt like in the time before the holiday we were about to go on that I was fighting a losing battle. She never made time to see me! I didn't feel wanted, appreciated at all and so I pulled myself out slightly so I didn't get hurt. She went on holiday before on this amazing holiday with her friends that you can't really beat, clubs and boat party's every night, I felt slightly paranoid I have to admit!
That she would cheat on me. But I stayed calm, tol her to have a great time etc. and she kept texting me back saying stuff like never been this drunk before having the most insane time! Anyway not too important, so were on holiday with my family now and she wasn't even exited to see me at all!
So I tried just being nice and fun and playful to take the awkwardness out of the situation and it worked, we started doing stuff together, hanging out, not much laughing but smiling. We went having any sex though and I wasn't forcing it on her for that reason! I thought that we had to get right first before the sex came so I was focused on that mainly! I then saw a text she left open to her friend that was on holiday with her saying she feels like I'm a best friend rather than a boyfriend! So I was like what the!! And why would you leave that out? So I started looking through her texts to other guys and it was like with this one guy that I know she kind of liked that was saying stuff like where are you tonight xx? Or wish you were her in the club or place we are.. always... 's. I didn't want to think anything of it, and chose to just trust her.
When I brought up the convocation though on how we were doing she told me crying that she still really loved me so much and thought I was the nicest guy in the world and she cared for me and didn't want to hurt me but said she didn't have any lust or feelings for me anymore. My god did this hurt! I loved this girl so much! we are still on holiday and have 7 days to go and I don't know how to play this. I wish I could get her to fall in love with me again but I doesn't work that way right, you can't do anything!
I decided to break up with her and just let her go at the end of the holiday, I told her I didn't like seeing her like this and that I just wanted her to be happy! But secretly I really want her back but don't know how to get her to want to come back to me? How would I get her to fall in love with me again? Is it possible to fall in love with someone all over again? Or not really? I am going to move on and do things like my skydiving licence, motor biking licence like I wanted to, and now I don't have a girlfriend anymore I can focus on having fun with just my mates being stupid and achieving stuff that will make me feel good about myself again.
What would you do in this situation though. I want her to want me again and have that lust we used to have but don't know how to get her to feel that way for me again. If you have any suggestions or advice I could really use some.