stargirl2712
Jul 30, 2012, 12:12 PM
Hello everyone!
I was in a 8 year medical program, and If I mainted my GPA, shadowed doctors, and aced two interviews during my sophomore year of undergrad, I would be accepted into medical school. I thought everything went well before my medical school interview as I have a near perfect GPA, tons of hours of shadowing and volunteer work, research positions, teaching assistant positions, etc. My med interview was a bit shaky... I was SO nervous and felt I didn't answer questions to the best of my ability. Last week, I received a letter saying I was deferred--that is, I'm not rejected but I have to attend another interview next year.
I'm just devastated and disappointed. I spent the first two years working so hard and all for nothing. I just question why God did this to me. I prayed SO much and everyday for my result to work out... at least for the medical school to give me the benefit of the doubt because I thought my resume spoke for itself (afterall, I aced the first of the two interviews). I just don't know what to do... I have two more years of undergrad and I have to study for the mcat and get a good score.
Now I see my friends who are in the program getting accepted and rejoicing on Facebook. I just feel even more worse on the inside. I don't drink, do drugs, or deceive people. I always care for people than they do for me. People who have considerably hurt me are getting accepted and not me. What kind of twist is this? What's worse... my ex boyfriend goes to college with me. We dated from freshman year up until halfway through our sophomore year and he got accepted. I'm just devastated still because he has hurt me a lot and now he gets to rejoice. I see him talking to another girl on Facebook too and now he gets that too!
Its just not fair. I don't really know how to deal with this. I fear returning to school SO SO SO much because I feel like a loser. I get better grades than my ex and have done so much more extracurriculars than him. Compared to many of my friends who got accepted, I feel I have more passion for life and to make a difference in medicine. I only see them wanting an easy option to get to medical school but not being truly passionate about helping others.
Why is it that my ex just gets the friends, this acceptance, and even a new girl? I seriously feel so overshadowed and worthless. I have nothing to prove for it either. I work so hard but I have nothing to show for it... and now God wants to challenge me further! Why don't they get challenged too? Are better things destined for me or am I just stuck this way? I don't know what to do and I just feel like laying in bed sobbing all day.
I'm sorry for venting but I feel like I've almost hit rock bottom. When I go back to school and see my ex with that new girl... I know I've surely hit it because I feel like all of our mutual friends will think she's better than me... fyi.. shes in this stupid program too but a year younger than me.
Has anyone gone through failure to achieve great success? Please help a depressed girl out. Thank-you!
I was in a 8 year medical program, and If I mainted my GPA, shadowed doctors, and aced two interviews during my sophomore year of undergrad, I would be accepted into medical school. I thought everything went well before my medical school interview as I have a near perfect GPA, tons of hours of shadowing and volunteer work, research positions, teaching assistant positions, etc. My med interview was a bit shaky... I was SO nervous and felt I didn't answer questions to the best of my ability. Last week, I received a letter saying I was deferred--that is, I'm not rejected but I have to attend another interview next year.
I'm just devastated and disappointed. I spent the first two years working so hard and all for nothing. I just question why God did this to me. I prayed SO much and everyday for my result to work out... at least for the medical school to give me the benefit of the doubt because I thought my resume spoke for itself (afterall, I aced the first of the two interviews). I just don't know what to do... I have two more years of undergrad and I have to study for the mcat and get a good score.
Now I see my friends who are in the program getting accepted and rejoicing on Facebook. I just feel even more worse on the inside. I don't drink, do drugs, or deceive people. I always care for people than they do for me. People who have considerably hurt me are getting accepted and not me. What kind of twist is this? What's worse... my ex boyfriend goes to college with me. We dated from freshman year up until halfway through our sophomore year and he got accepted. I'm just devastated still because he has hurt me a lot and now he gets to rejoice. I see him talking to another girl on Facebook too and now he gets that too!
Its just not fair. I don't really know how to deal with this. I fear returning to school SO SO SO much because I feel like a loser. I get better grades than my ex and have done so much more extracurriculars than him. Compared to many of my friends who got accepted, I feel I have more passion for life and to make a difference in medicine. I only see them wanting an easy option to get to medical school but not being truly passionate about helping others.
Why is it that my ex just gets the friends, this acceptance, and even a new girl? I seriously feel so overshadowed and worthless. I have nothing to prove for it either. I work so hard but I have nothing to show for it... and now God wants to challenge me further! Why don't they get challenged too? Are better things destined for me or am I just stuck this way? I don't know what to do and I just feel like laying in bed sobbing all day.
I'm sorry for venting but I feel like I've almost hit rock bottom. When I go back to school and see my ex with that new girl... I know I've surely hit it because I feel like all of our mutual friends will think she's better than me... fyi.. shes in this stupid program too but a year younger than me.
Has anyone gone through failure to achieve great success? Please help a depressed girl out. Thank-you!