So me and my ex broke up due to us kind of growing apart. I know that I did a lot of stuff wrong and I have taken the time to fix it and I am a way better person then I was before. So basically my ex told me about 2 weeks ago that she didn't want any contact from me as I was in a bad place (was really depressed and even contemplated suicide at a point) so she said that after awhile we could talk and maybe start as friends. I told her that at that moment, I couldn't think of just being friends with her so I basically said that I can never talk to her again (I know that was so effing stupid of me) but now I would like to meet with her, not even to talk about our relationship just to see how she is doing. I want to give her the space she needs but want to contact her.

Also, forgot to mention that we would have been dating for 4 years prior to this happening.

I think you should both go no contact for at least 4-6 months if you want to move on.

"but now I would like to meet with her, not even to talk about our relationship just to see how she is doing. I want to give her the space she needs but want to contact her."

Well yeah, don't we all after the initial breakup. It's really tough going from speaking to someone daily to absolutely nothing. You not only miss the relationship but the friendship aspect of it too. I'm 7 weeks out of a relationship and the most difficult part has been the longing for those wonderful conversations we used to have. Still, I'm in a happy place and don't want to break that streak. I know if we were to get back in touch my feelings would resurface and I'd never move on. That fact keeps me in "No Contact" mode.

You can only be friends if both of you are OK and comfortable with the idea of either or both of you seeing other people.