Iris72
Jul 6, 2012, 10:00 AM
I wasn't sure how to approach this, but I am battling this feeling for far too long. And don't have anybody to talk to. In advance I ask for constructive advice not hurt/blameful words. I am beating myself up enough as it is I believe.
I am married for 10 years and know my husbandh almost 12. We have 3 kids together... the older ones from previous relationships. My youngest is 10 and our sunshine and love in life. All in all I have a wonderful marriage and there isn't much I could complain about when it comes to my husband. However, we went through some heartship with my oldest 10 years back when a car accident left her mentally disabled. We coped and grew stronger together over the years, but yet 3 years ago I met his now best friend, which had divorced then. I felt a physical attraction towards him from the very beginning and always hat "butterflys" when thinking about him or when spend time on rare occasions. I went so far and told my husband back then and he took it hard but was willing to work with me on this together if I still loved him. Well things got better and I didn't see his best friend for over a year. I thought I had past this silly attraction and was grateful for my wonderful family, and life, again. Never stopped thinking aboutabout him, though. Yet recently he came back into our lifes as it should be seeing as him my husband are really close. And here it is... the feelings and guilt about how I think and feel about this guy. His best friend never encouraged me but the other day we had a little too much to drink on a BBQ and he started flirting with me which I know he regret the very next day. Now I do know that he is atraccted to me, as well and that makes the situation even worse. I realize he probably will never act on it, but still. I have been soul searching and trying to figure this out but I can't shake it off and move on. Any suggestions as to what to do, what that means, how to feel about it? And believe me I already know it is wrong, but can you love 2 men at the same time? I don't want to lose what I have with my husband. But it is taking a toll on me...
I am married for 10 years and know my husbandh almost 12. We have 3 kids together... the older ones from previous relationships. My youngest is 10 and our sunshine and love in life. All in all I have a wonderful marriage and there isn't much I could complain about when it comes to my husband. However, we went through some heartship with my oldest 10 years back when a car accident left her mentally disabled. We coped and grew stronger together over the years, but yet 3 years ago I met his now best friend, which had divorced then. I felt a physical attraction towards him from the very beginning and always hat "butterflys" when thinking about him or when spend time on rare occasions. I went so far and told my husband back then and he took it hard but was willing to work with me on this together if I still loved him. Well things got better and I didn't see his best friend for over a year. I thought I had past this silly attraction and was grateful for my wonderful family, and life, again. Never stopped thinking aboutabout him, though. Yet recently he came back into our lifes as it should be seeing as him my husband are really close. And here it is... the feelings and guilt about how I think and feel about this guy. His best friend never encouraged me but the other day we had a little too much to drink on a BBQ and he started flirting with me which I know he regret the very next day. Now I do know that he is atraccted to me, as well and that makes the situation even worse. I realize he probably will never act on it, but still. I have been soul searching and trying to figure this out but I can't shake it off and move on. Any suggestions as to what to do, what that means, how to feel about it? And believe me I already know it is wrong, but can you love 2 men at the same time? I don't want to lose what I have with my husband. But it is taking a toll on me...