So my night began I gave my 3 yr old son a bath and at bath time he was saying phrases of my 3yr old daughter that passed away 4 yrs ago, so we were discussing her as I like to do since he never met her cause she passed before he was born.

After bath time I put his PJ's on and started cleaning up, about 40mins after bath time, he had to do poop, so I put him on the toilet and told him to call me when he was done and went back to cleaning just in the next room. He was in there little while so I asked my boyfriend to check on him, he did and as he was walking away, my son let out a little shriek calling my boyfriend name, so my boyfriend turned around and my son was white as a ghost, trembling with tears running don his face. I then also was there cause I heard my boyfriend saying "what happended?" my so jumped into my boyfriend arms and started saying in a trembling shaking in shock" the monstor , the monstor it hit me" he claims a monstor ran out of my room which is right across from the bathroom and went intot he bathroom hit him on the shoulder and went back to my room. I am freaked out!

So we took my son into the other room and tried calming him down. Let me just say I have 3 kids the oldest being 13 and I have NEVER seen a child in so much fear as I seen my son, he was shaking with fear and so scared.

So when he calmed down I decided to ask some questions, here is how that went:

I asked "what happened why you so scared"

He said " a monstor ran out of mommy room(which is right across from the bathroom) and went in bathroom and hit me then went back to mommy room"

I asked "where did it hit you"

He points to his left shoulder

I asked " was the monstor a boy a girl or an animal"

He answered " a girl"

I asked " was the girl big like mommy or little like gianna(his friend from school)"

He said " it little girl"

I asked " what color was the girl clothes red, yellow......."

He said " black"

He then said "mommy the mostor scary, like scary movie"

Then I just tried to reassure him that there are no monstors in the house or my room, but when I got to my bedroom he would not come into it, like he froze at the door.

So I'm asking can anyone help and give me insight as to what went on in my house? Is it possible it was my 3yr old daughter that passed? But shouldn't she have passed over? Shouldn't she be at peace? Was it something bad, or evil since it hit him?

Nothing like this has ever happened in my home, I mean from time to time we get the occasional toy that goes off by itself or occasionally my son will use the same phrases that my deceased daughter used to use and he nevre met her so how would he know what she used to say or do? But I just say maybe she with him watching over him. I am so confused and have so many thoughts running through my mind can someone please give me an insight as to what this was.

Many thanks

No, if you're asking if your daughter is haunting your house disguised as a monster and bit your chilld, I don't think so. He's at a very suggestible age - my thought is that you talked about his sister, he has seen a monster movie, for whatever reason he tied them together.

I have a 3-year old Grandson. One night at HIS house he woke up screaming because MY dog (which has never been at his house) came out from under his bed and bit his finger. One other time a dinosaur was between him and the bathroom.

I don't know that this was anything more than a nightmare. I'm also not sure that talking about someone who has died isn't freaking him out. Kids at this age do not understand death and can end up afraid to fall asleep for fear they will be dead.

I think you should talk to his Pediatrician about this episode AND how you discuss his sister with him.

Also, please stop posting the same question.

I am new to this site so I apologize for posting more than once. Still getting used to the site and trying topost to different areas where I might receive feedback.

I never say my daughter is passed I just talk about her like I do his friends and other things, I don't make it scary or where he can't understand. I have also spoken to his doctor and he says there is nothing wrong with discussing his siter.

But thanks for your feed back!

I am new to this site so i apologize for posting more than once. still getting used to the site and trying topost to different areas where i might receive feedback.

I never say my daughter is passed i just talk about her like i do his friends and other things, i dont make it scary or where he can't understand. I have also spoken to his doctor and he says there is nothing wrong with discussing his siter.

but thanks for your feed back!!


No problem - the site can be confusing. I don't know what rules you see when you sign up.

I'm still not clear - you talk about his sister. Doesn't he ask where she is?

I'm not saying not to discuss her. I'm just wondering how often/how much.

I'm a stepmother. I babysit a lot. The 3-year old asked me if he died would he go to Heaven with Grandma X (his blood grandmother). I was stunned. He was bouncing off a pretty innocent remark my stepdaughter made about her mother watching over her.

He picked up on it, goes to Church, understands the Heaven concept and worried.

I have had the talk with him about death and that his sister and granparents have died and gone to heaven, but that was once and he seemed to understand as he has a couple books on heaven that we read.Yes he asks where she is but I say she is in heaven and is an angel. But he does not seem to be confused by this, he knows he has one sister who lives with us and one who lives in heaven, I have pictures all around. He seems to understand she went to heaven.

We don't discuss everyday that she died, just will say bless this one and that one and so on. I have beed advise from phsichiatrists and doctors that all of this was OK, that because she is part of our home with pictures and stuff it is OK to talk about her as he is going to be cuious who she is.

Anyway my main worry was just that he saw a ghost or her or something. Not that talking about her scares him, cause I deff don't think it does.

So many possible issues

First most likely not the ghost of the daughter if anything supernatural a evil spirit or demon. If one believes in that.

On the more physical real side, perhaps at 3 a child is having issues dealing with reality and watching too many scary movies, Perhaps a 3 year old that wants some of their own attention and is tired of hearing about a dead sister or being compared to a dead sister that they don't know and may or may not want to be like.

Perhaps less talk about the sister who is dead, and more about the child who is alive, let him learn about his sister in his time when he wants to.
Perhaps in his mind this sister has become a monster he has to compete with for attention. One that he has been trying to live up to what they could do at this or that age.

I had a cousin I did not kwow that I was always being told about and compared to, I learned to hate this person I never knew, and as I counsel people, I find this happens often in families. For me, one A minus was less than my cousin made, I was in the play at school but my cousin always had leading roles I was told, I played in the band, 3 instruments, but my cousin was always in the "first chair" in the band. I went to college, he went to a better one, I became a engineer, he was a better and more well paid one. I got a girlfriend pregnant, he was the good boy.

I am saying that while keeping a memory alive and letting them know a little, but ifyou are always talking about this daughter, it may be misunderstood by a 3 year old

I used to have a special spray bottle to keep monsters away at night. My little sister insisted we close her closet door every night when she went to bed so the monster inside couldn't get out. A monster used to live under my bed when I was little. I had to jump from the throw rug onto the mattress top and thus leap over the exposed floor next to the bed so the monster wouldn't reach out and grab my ankle. Even if no scary movies or TV shows or stories, children around the age of 3 and 4 somehow come up with a monster mentality as part of their emotional development. It's how you handle those monsters and how you reassure the child that makes all the difference.

It not like I compare him to her all the time, but I do speak of her often, if you have children and lost one how could I not.

But I iguess I could see your point how he would always feel in comparison to her or in competition with her, I can see where you going with that.

But I think I did handle it well, we went and made sure there were no more monsters in the house, we told them all to go away.

And thanks for different views and thoughts!

Where were the other 3 kids when all this went on?
Could one or more of them have pulled a prank on him?