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View Full Version : Dating Jitters


hippiegirl
Feb 27, 2007, 02:24 PM
I tend to sweat excessively on my palms and underarms when I am on a date or even talking to a person of the opposite sex. I've tried deodarants and antiperspirants, but nothing seems to work. Plus, when I go to shake their hands or hug, I feel akward and start to sweat even more. What do I do to avoid looking like a sweaty mess?:eek:

Scleros
Feb 27, 2007, 11:01 PM
If you don't sweat like that normally or when talking to people of the same sex, it's most likely psychological. You'll need to learn to become more comfortable with yourself, more self-confident, and less anxious. There's plenty of info to be Googled on improving self-confidence. Also, if you find the anxiety impacting your daily living or crippling, you might look into professional counseling. Many people have social phobias and anxieties that they have to work through. The simple answer is it's really all in your head - and it is, but the mental techniques and discipline necessary to overcome it require ongoing practice and proper instruction. Some things that have worked for me: deep slow breathing, telling myself the other person is no better than me - why should they make me nervous? trying to "care" less about the outcome, focusing on being relaxed. Also, if your personality is naturally introverted, avoid taking advice like "ah you just need to get out more" from extroverts. In the long term, they are correct, but in the short term until you have a handle on the situation, you'll just stress yourself out more.

Tony J
Feb 28, 2007, 08:39 AM
Sweating is a natural physiological response. If you are anxious, as all of us are from time to time, then try to put yourself in situations that cause your anxiety. DO NOT throw yourself into a situation that causes a great amount of anxiety. Try an exposure technique. Engage in casual conversation for a very short amount of time with a guy on the first day. Gradually increase the amount of time you spend talking to guys over a period of weeks. I would suggest 30 seconds to a minute on your first encounter and gradually work your way up. You might have to put yourself into situations that make you anxious at first but as the exposure progresses you should get more habituated to the situations that are causing you to sweat. Also, recruit a friend to at least talk with about your situation and your progress with your exposure to social situations. Exposure treatments are used for phobias. If my assumption is correct you might be slightly anxious in social situations regarding the opposite sex. Try this before paying a psychologist as they are quite expensive. $100-$200 per hour. Also, lay off the marijuana as it increases anxiety. If you do not smoke then great but I am making inferences based on your user name.

Let me know if this helps.