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View Full Version : My girlfriend broke up on me. Should I fight for my 6 year relationship back?


Arthur28
May 24, 2012, 10:59 AM
We lasted 6 years. We were so in love, we shared interests, visions and values since the beginning. We had too much in common. We laughed and cried so much together. She always supported me in my music career. In the middle of our relationship we discussed getting married and having children which both agreed at the time. We had some regular fights now and then but never quitting. She was never seeking material things in me, she always demonstrated a transparent interest for who I am, not what I had. Only one time we split for about three days when we were reaching two years, when a guy tried to step into our relationship, however she dismissed him and literally begged me crying, to keep going which I accepted.

The reasons she just told me recently to break up are: I need time and space, you were too jealous, I don't want to have children anymore, we need to meet new people by ourselves and do things on our own. What I think about why we broke is: Probably I was too needy at the end since didn't have a job sometimes and she was inviting me too much. Also their parents and co-workers (and this is probably the main reason I think). Even though we never had issues, their parents were not that open to me all the time. She started a new job 5 months ago earning good money and meeting new people while I was also working in another regular job. She probably was induced to leave me because of "society" pressures.

And I am afraid (not sure yet) she might met someone new there. And lastly, I think she left me because I didn't hurry on saving money and marry her. When we used to fight nearly the end, she kept on blaming me of "not fighting hard enough for ourselves". But I swear I tried so hard. We had a healthy intimate relationship too, very compatible. However we didn't have a place to make love so we went to hotels for a long time.

I feel so bad and guilty, but I am willing to change, already have a steady job, a car, and probably will study soon at the university again. I am trying so hard to keep no contact. But sometimes I fail on sending her love text messages now and then, which every time leads her to tell me it's over more and more. I deleted her from Facebook. We need to be together again, anyone could see we're meant to be!

Help, thanks a lot I am so devastated.

C0bra_M3nace
May 24, 2012, 11:19 AM
There are a lot of reason that you probably should fight for it, but there's a lot of other reasons you shouldn't. She doesn't seem to care much anymore, if she, after 6 years, can think that way and just leave without feeling as torn as you shows she has already broken the bond she shared with you. For this, I think you should move on. Go out, meet new people, do things you've never done before, things she wouldn't have let you do. Break the bond you shared with her as she did to you, and release yourself from this torture. It's all on you, and you owe it to yourself to be free. Sad but true.

mmresd
May 24, 2012, 11:21 AM
No, be thankful that it happened, accept the decision, keep busy, and start to move on. Eventually, you will get over this relationship and be able to start a new one. Do not even think about contacting your ex.

talaniman
May 24, 2012, 08:32 PM
My heart goes out to you my friend as losing such a big part of your life is devastating. NO guarantees but if you Follow strict NC, and that's a struggle I know, and continue to focus and better yourself, FOR YOURSELF, then your life will get better, and COULD warrant a second look.

Even if it doesn't somebody will take a first look, and want to take a deeper one. So you may be devastated NOW, you can still thrive and survive, and be better. WIN/WIN.

Good luck!