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View Full Version : Being in a relationship, but loving someone else!


HayGirl13
May 8, 2012, 02:50 PM
I’m 16 years old and I’ve been in a relationship for over 6 months now. The guy I am with treats me so well. Although there are many things that I do not like about him. He's quite immature, way too overprotective, a hypocrite, creates arguments, doesn't trust me yet there’s been rumors he's cheated on me and he is very unorganized with his life.

At the start of our relationship I liked him so much! But as the relationship has gone on my feelings for him have become weaker and weaker, I think the main reason for this is because he constantly creates arguments out of boredom.

Since I was 11 I have literally been in love, with a family friend of mine, let’s call him Dee. Although he is not a very good person because he gets in a lot of trouble, yet he tells me he wants to change. In the past he has told me multiple times that he was going to ask me out but nothing ever happened. He is quite a jerk and has cheated on his entire ex's. He can get girls so easy and he knows it.

So my point of this is. I’m in a relationship with my current boyfriend but I still love Dee and I always have. At the moment he's telling me he wants to be a better person, he's even moved states so he can keep himself out of trouble. I am a good person and I feel as if I could help him be a better person, as it is only one person that he gets in trouble with.

He says that I’m the girl he’s always wanted and that he won’t treat me like the past all that other cute stuff. But What if he really had changed and becomes a good person. Doesn't it sound right to be with the person I love? I know this is so unfair on my current boyfriend as I’m in love with Dee. But I don’t know what to do! HELP ME PLEASE! Any answers are appreciated!!

I've liked this guy for 5 years now. He is not a good person and I know I need to get over him but I can't. I really need some tips on getting over him.

If you've found any easy way to get over a guy please let me know!!

mmresd
May 8, 2012, 03:44 PM
The first thing you need to do is end things with your current boyfriend, because your feelings are not the same for him anymore, and right now, it seems like the only thing you are doing is leading him on. As far as the other guys go, why would you want a troublemaker in your life, find someone who is worth your time, not some guy that just keeps promising to change and never actually does. However, at your young age, how about just staying single for a while, why do you feel the need to be in a relationship all the time?

HayGirl13
May 9, 2012, 03:47 AM
I know he is a trouble maker but I simply can not keep myself away from him. I think about him all the time, I can't stop. Even if I try find a better guy then Dee, Dee will still be in my mind and it'll ruin any other possible relationship. This relationship is my first.. I don't feel the need to be in one

sean_s
May 9, 2012, 10:58 PM
Learn to choose a side. Choose one side, and accept your decision and go - somebody will be hurt with your decision, but be honest to them.

Homegirl 50
May 10, 2012, 08:04 AM
You need to break up with the current boyfriend, you are not being fair to him as you don't have the right feelings for him.
But don't run to the other guy. Give him time to prove himself. Stay single for a while. At 16 you have time. You don't need a boyfriend right now.

talaniman
May 10, 2012, 07:14 PM
Leave both guys alone, the bad boy, and the rebound.

HayGirl13
May 10, 2012, 09:06 PM
I told my current boyfriend that I do not have feelings for him like I used to. He says he doesn't want to break up, he just wants to try make everything good like it used to be

HayGirl13
May 10, 2012, 09:19 PM
I've liked this guy for 5 years. He's a player and can get any girl! He tells me that between us its different and that he actually has feelings for me. We used to speak everyday and he'd come and see me all the time + he told me multiple times that he'd ask me out but it never happened.

Now I have a boyfriend.. though I'm not happy in this relationship and want to end it.

The guy I've liked for 5 years has started talking to me again and tells me that I am the only girl he has ever wanted and that I make him happy and that I should break up with my boyfriend for him.. He says he's different and isn't a troublemaker anymore. He says he now wants me more then ever... Should I see how things go between me and him after ending the relationship? Or do you think nothing will happen although he says something will.. like all the other times?

Homegirl 50
May 11, 2012, 08:47 AM
Well this is about what you want isn't it? So are you just going to continue to lie to him?

Disney87
May 14, 2012, 10:18 AM
Ok, as what I evaluate, both your current boyfriend and Dee are not a good boyfriend. You might in love with them right now, but I believe when you grown up, you would like another better guy. You're only 16 and why so rush into this kind of mess relationship? It is not that the guy is worth for you to be with. It is a loser and a jerk who is fighting for your youth. A guy can tell you that he will change when he does not completely get your person. Once he does, he will never change. A simple question for you. Do you think a guy will change themselves in a day or a month or a year? It is his all while inbuilt characteristic since he born. If he treats his ex like that, he might treat you the same way as well. But, I could not judge like that as well because maybe he has more feeling and will be more serious towards you. But if he really love you, please do ask him to prove his changes before he commit. That's the most secure way.

While for my experience and advice, if you really consider the Dee, please have a clean break up with your current boyfriend before involve in another new relationship. Give yourself and empty space to be single and completely over the ex before commit. Then your love life won't into complication and worse.

C0bra_M3nace
May 23, 2012, 10:50 AM
Only your instincts count on this one. However consider this, how many times do you think he's used those lines. See how you're falling for him, don't you think that's how he gets all those girls in the first place. I do believe "Once a player, always a player", and I do realize some people can change, but ask yourself if you're ready to find out the hard way or not. If your answer to that is yes, then go right ahead. You know what to do if that answer is no.

Good luck, and be safe.