Log in

View Full Version : Fallen Relationship


lonelyeyes
Apr 29, 2012, 07:55 PM
This is kind of a long story so buckle in...

I was in a relationship with a guy for about 3 years. We met in middle school and became friends. Then later on we had our first job together. Well, when we were in high school (he is a year ahead of me in school) we took the dive and started dating. After I graduated high school, I moved about 2 hours away from our hometown. This worked for about a month and then we decided to take a break. Especially since he was joining the Armed Forces. While he was away for 3 months, I worked at my job and went to school. After he got out of basic training, we got back together. My dream was coming true. I really do love this boy. After about 4 months, he proposed! Of course I said "yes" because I believe we are meant to be together. Well, he now lives about 5 hours away from me. We have mutually decided to take another break. He says it is so I can get out and experience life. However, I have tried to explain to him that all I want to do is be with him and by his side.

What should I do? He says he wants to get back together when he gets out of the service, but that isn't for 3 more years. I love him with all my heart and I try to go out with guys but nobody compares to my man. I still have the engagement ring. I don't wear it. It is put up, but I just want him to realize that I love him.

Any suggestions are appreciated!
Thank you for reading.

bend1384
Apr 29, 2012, 10:06 PM
I don't know him or how he really feels, but in my opinion I wouldn't wait around for him. Go out, do what makes you happy. Hang out with friends, find some hobbies you love or a job you enjoy. If you happen to be single when he comes back, that's fine. If you happen to have found someone else and thing in your life are going well, sorry, he had his chance to be with you and chose to let you go because you weren't in the same place. I know there is more to it than that, but if you spend your time wanting what's not there you are wasting it. Just figure out who you are, be happy with what you have, and don't dwell on it. A woman who knows who they are and what they want in life is way more desirable than a woman who will follow someone around and change themselves to fit what a man thinks they should be, and it will make you happier to be yourself; just figure out exactly who that is before you decide about any boys. (especially one who thinks distance is something that can keep you two apart)

screamlk
Apr 29, 2012, 11:09 PM
Another case,I want my cake,and iceing to.remember as long

As you allow yourselve to be strung a long he is going to

Allow it.a lot of men will not let you go because he don't

Want to see you with anybody else.and its not because

He wants you,its because he is selfish.I think it is better is

For you to let him go now,and hurt for a short while,instead of getting back with him and hurting for the
Long haul.. lick your woounds and get over it.keep dateing
You won't find the same,but you could find better.

indya
Apr 30, 2012, 12:33 AM
Take a break. Take time to heal. Immediately starting to date other guys might put you off!

Spend some time on your ownself. Make friends, and have fun. And get back into the dating game when you are ready!

talaniman
Apr 30, 2012, 08:44 AM
Cut it any way you wish, but a break is a break up, so instead of waiting for three years on him, enjoy your freedom to explore, experiment to your hearts content. He has a commitment, and there is no telling where this will lead him, so live your life and be as open to your own options, opportunities, and possibilities as he is, and more.

You deserve this, and need it, so take advantage of it, and don't waste your time on any cockamamy scheme to get him to concede to any temporary agreements, or commitments to each other so far in the future. That's crazy!

Live in reality, and enjoy it, not fantasy, and worry. He has left high school behind, so should you. As an adult, you have to realize that the realities of life changes even the best plans.