Sass35
Apr 25, 2012, 04:41 PM
I have been married for 15 years. I have three wonderful children (15, 10, and 7 years old). My husband was wonderful when we were dating. He was very attentive, took me places, and we were able to have conversations. Since we've gotten married, he has foisted all the responsibilities on me while he plays video games, watches movies, and reads books. He cannot handle me being away from him. So when I have gone to college and work, he ignores me all the time. He just admitted that it wasn't tntil last year that he wanted to step up and be a parent. We have been to counseling about 5 different times. This last time the marriage counselor asked us both about good things he did, but when these things were pointed out to my husband as good moments in our marriage, he argued with the counselor saying he can't be a good husband. I have given up my dream of graduating college, of having a career, and any interest I had before I was married to make my marriage work. I am now a stay at home mom who's only interests is those that my husband has. So that he will pay a little bit of attention to me. Right now, I'm lucky to get 30 minutes of his undivided attention. This latest time I got fed up and said I wanted a divorce. I agreed to go to a walk in clinic with him. I told the psychiatrist my issues. He said he'd do anything to save his marriage. The psychiatrist said he needed therapy and he's never gone back. My marriage is like a merry-go-round. The issues get so bad that I try to talk to him. All he says is that's how it is. Then I start talking divorce and he becomes a loving, caring, attentive husband. I call it the honeymoon period. I wish he was like that all the time. It has been 15 years. Am I being manipulated? Is it time that I go through with it and just get a divorce? Am I crazy to think that my marriage is ever going to get better?