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View Full Version : I'm exclusive with a girl I really like, but over summer she wants her freedom


propelzero
Apr 24, 2012, 07:25 PM
Me and this girl that I really like have been exclusive for over 6 months now, and we haven't dated because she was in a long relationship last year and it put a lot of stress on her. She says that she really loves me as a person, and she likes what we have, but this summer she has said she doesn't want to be as attached, and she just wants freedom. We have talked about it, and we both say we want too make it work, however she isn't very confident that it will. I really like her a lot, and I don't want our "thing" to end. But lately we have become less attached and she chooses to hang out with other friends, guys and girls, over hanging out with me. What do I do to make this not be the end, and to get her to want to be with me and only me?

Fr_Chuck
Apr 24, 2012, 07:32 PM
Sounds like it is ending, and you are also not really "dating" if you are not going out, when and where do you hang out together as a couple ?

But if she wants freedom, that means she most likely have other dating plans for summer, perhaps someone who was away during the school year. Or just other plans and does not want to be tied down to texting or bothering with you. Accept it, be free for the summer, expect it to be over and if it is not when school starts back, great

none12345
Apr 24, 2012, 08:31 PM
I know this is not the answer you are expecting but this is the end for now and you should treat is as the end until she comes crawling back and then you can decide whether you want to be with her. Sounds like she wants her own life, one that does not involve you and she just can't end it with you straight up. You should do the same, move on from her, stop contacting her and get your own life, one where she is not in.

talaniman
Apr 24, 2012, 10:53 PM
I am really confused as to what the hell you are doing. Doesn't make sense to be exclusive, but not dating. That just makes you friends or casual hang out buddy. That's all she wants and that's all she gives.

I think you back off and reorganize your life. At least have as much fun doing your thing without her, as she is doing without you. Sadly the notion of love, and romance is only what YOU want while she obviously doesn't.

Please guy don't waste time looking for magic, or miracle advise to change her mind, because sadly there is none.

mmresd
Apr 26, 2012, 11:47 AM
Well, this is the way of telling you, I have used you for what I needed you for but now I don't need you anymore. Catch the hint and move on, this girl has no interest in you, all it was to her was a comfortable status on Facebook.

propelzero
Jun 10, 2012, 02:59 PM
So me and this girl have had a "thing" for about 7 months. She doesn't want to date me because she doesn't want a relationship now. Also, she wants to have her freedom (not without me but she wants me to allow her to do what she wants like hang out with other friends, guy or girl, without me getting mad). We've been fighting a lot lately, and our fights are usually about stuff like one of us blowing the other off to hang out with other people or something like that. I don't think that she doesn't want to date me because she wants to hook up with other guys, but just because she doesn't want me constantly bugging her about what she's doing and stuff like that. I really like her and I don't want our thing to end, but I don't know what to do. Only thing I can think of other than dating or being done is, keep going like we are, and let her come to me when she wants to, and not constantly talk to her and ask to hang out all of the time like we used to do. I think she'll come to me when she wants to, and I truly think she won't do anything with other guys and like "use" me this summer. But any other advice?

Locearbhaill
Jun 10, 2012, 03:08 PM
So me and this girl have had a "thing" for about 7 months. She doesn't want to date me because she doesn't want a relationship now. Also, she wants to have her freedom (not without me but she wants me to allow her to do what she wants like hang out with other friends, guy or girl, without me getting mad). We've been fighting a lot lately, and our fights are usually about stuff like one of us blowing the other off to hang out with other people or something like that. I dont think that she doesn't want to date me because she wants to hook up with other guys, but just because she doesn't want me constantly bugging her about what she's doing and stuff like that. I really like her and I dont want our thing to end, but I don't know what to do. Only thing I can think of other than dating or being done is, keep going like we are, and let her come to me when she wants to, and not constantly talk to her and ask to hang out all of the time like we used to do. I think she'll come to me when she wants to, and I truly think she won't do anything with other guys and like "use" me this summer. But any other advice?

Well you could just not be on her case about everything and DON'T blow her off to hang with someone else. If she's that important to you then you should put her ahead of your other friends. I'm not going to type out everything right now cause my fingers are fairly sore.

talaniman
Jun 10, 2012, 09:58 PM
Can't you see this "thing" is unhealthy??