Log in

View Full Version : Conflict with adult children


tired grandma
Apr 16, 2012, 01:31 PM
I have a 30 y/o daughter who has 3 children,an 18 y/o grandson and a 19 y/o grandson, who alllive with me, and there is constant turmoil in my house. The 30 y/o has a 5 y/o daughter, a 4 y/o son and a 14 month daughter. She lives on the computer and rarely helps clean the house. She says she is not going to clean up after the boys. The boys say they are not going to clean up after her and her kids. The 18 y/o is here because his mother kicked him out when he turned 18.The 19 y/o has been with me for 3 years.The daughter is here because her husband left her with 2 kids and 1 on the way, and living in a house with no heat. I love them all but am so sick of the dirty house. I work 40 hrs a week and have no space and no life. Every time I set down rules, it only 1 or 2 days. Any tips or suggestions?

hannabella
Apr 16, 2012, 05:42 PM
Stop enabling them. They aren't taking you seriously because they don't think there are any consequences to not following your rules.

Start by taking away the computer. Yeah that sounds like a bit of a childish form of discipline, but as they always say "If you want to act like a child then be prepared to be treated as one".

For those who don't have jobs, tell them to get out and find one. They should be spending their free time doing that. Demand filled in job apps as proof.

Let them know, that if they don't help out around the house and clean up after themselves they can find some place else to live.

They need to know you mean business.

Fr_Chuck
Apr 16, 2012, 05:52 PM
Put a password on computer and no one uses it, unless they are doing the work, give duties and don't clean up after them, if they have no clean clothes that is their issue, thow it in their room and let them pick it up.

If they are not following other rules, sorry but time for tough love, sometimes you have to kick them out and let them learn life is tough