I fully support my child on my own. He gives me no child support. I have raised her on my own since was 6 weeks old. She is now 5 years old. We have a verbal arrangement. He gets to have her a few days out of the month. We have never been to court for custody. I'm getting married now. And my fiancés job is lined up in Kansas. I also have a job lined up. Do I have to tell him about the move before? Or can I just leave? The reason is because I fear him. He makes threats and I have reported to police twice. Please help :(

You let him see the child a couple times a month, but you are afraid of him?

You can leave, but he has the right to file for visitation and ask the court to order you to move back.

If he does see his daughter then you should tell him. Maybe let him see her just for a few days before you leave? If you're afraid of him you shouldn't even let him see your daughter. Maybe you should just text him or email him? If you don't have the guts to go face-to-face, that is. I'm guessing he has behavioural problems of some sort? If he does, I'd tell him by text or email or Facebook. I'm sure he's get quite mad if he found out you'd moved without telling him. Hope it all works out :)

If he does see his daughter then you should tell him. Maybe let him see her just for a few days before you leave? If you're afraid of him you shouldn't even let him see your daughter. Maybe you should just text him or email him? If you don't have the guts to go face-to-face, that is. I'm guessing he has behavioural problems of some sort? If he does, I'd tell him by text or email or Facebook. I'm sure he's get quite mad if he found out you'd moved without telling him. Hope it all works out :)


This is very bad legal advice. We take great pride in our legal answers on AMHD. We have practicing Attorneys, law school graduates, people who work in the industry, people who do great research.

I realize you are 13 and bored with nothing to do during school break but please don't post just for the sake of keeping yourself busy.

Your "advice" could cause someone a great deal of difficulty.

... Do I have to tell him about the move before? Or can I just leave? ...(

Depends on which state you are in.

He is your child's father. As such he has rights. If he is a part of your child's life and you move without informing him, then he can take you to court and be in a better position to gain custody.

Your best bet is to discuss this with him and offer a compromise visitation schedule. Maybe every other school holiday or something similar.

You made a mistake by not asking for child support and not getting custody and visitation defined by a court.