GUYMANDUDE
Mar 29, 2012, 06:40 PM
I have been together with my girlfriend for about 5 years now.
When we met I kept it totally honest with her, especially about the 2 baby girls I have from a previous relationship, but she lied about a few things.
First one was not being a virgin, told me that she didn't want me thinking I got the best of her. She thought I would just be a fling. I told her it's OK, what's done is done and now that she loves me she says she wants me to believe she is a virgin, I told her OK if you say so! She got mad! Haha
She asked me to promise things to her like,
"Tell me you wont ever leave me"
"Tell me you love me"
"Let's be together forever"
I took a chance and decided for the first time to actually try these things.
Over the last 5 years she has broken up with me about twice to 3 times a year.
During 2 years while she was in grad school, we made a pact to see each other by taking turns, we each visit every other month. This never happened and I ended up going down every single time. We were only 400 miles apart. Her reasons were, being busy in school and having a part time job so I just said it's all right and sucked it up. Went to see her almost every other month for the 2 years.
During her time at school she made me go buy a web cam to chat and talk every single night! Sometimes I was working and she would beg me to go home just so she could see me on the web cam, which I did. I never said no to any of her requests. My life was for her.
But there came the arguments.
Every time she got upset her words ring in my head today " this means we weren't meant for each other" " We can't be together"
"Why don't you go find someone else" "I'm doing this for you, so you can be happy"
It broke my heart but I kept my words and was always there when she decided to come back. This may sound stupid or I just feel stupid at this point. Sucker for love!
Most of the time she felt like I was blaming her for things when I only wanted her to understand how certain things make me feel.
Then graduation time came and she broke up with me again, I say about the 6th time! I secretly wanted to surprise her and bought tickets to fly down to see her at graduation, she signed into my plane account and canceled my ticket so I didn't end up seeing her at the graduation and no refund. She ignored me for about 2 months after she moved back. So we get back together again and things were OK.
About 1 year later we planned to go so a festival together then she invites her mom and half brother along. She picks me up and I have a stomach ache from eating pizza late and falling asleep. I dare not cancel or stay home and also would know I can recover later in the day. During the ride down, I said my stomach hurts but instead of comforting me I guess I annoyed her. She promptly tell her mom how annoying and troublesome I am.
I told her, " If I knew you would say that I would have just shut up" in response to her comment, she hen says, " Yea, why can't you just sit there and shut up!" By this time I got fed up with her talking to me that way in front of her mom and half brother and said, " Don't talk to me that way!" and she was yelling and throwing a fit while driving. I told her to calm down and she just started going off like " you want to see crazy!" I was scared because we were traveling 70mph in a van and she was driving erratically and irrationally. She then backhands me in the face~! Haha, it's funny now when I think about it but she did give me a bloody nose and the erratic driving continued! I had to grab the steering wheel from the passenger side and tell her to slow down and calm down, I thought she was going to crash and kill all of us. We got off the exit and I got out of the car and told her I never wanted to see her again.
So now it's been over 2 years since and we stayed friends with benefits, she would not move on and I never let her go. All her friends and family didn't know I existed anymore. I never moved on until last year, I actually was dating someone she knew, which is no big deal but on new years, she calls me after not talking for about 3 months and says we will get back together. I actually moved on or have started to date other girls by this time and I decided to say OK again and dump the other girl.
Now this is where everything changes.
I stopped putting up with her cr*p!
I feel more annoyed of her.
She asks me questions she already asked me and it annoys the heck out of me!
I find myself wanting to be alone most of the time and busy working on my own goals and business. What used to be me begging for her to come and see me, is now her trying to see me and I find myself saying no and refusing her offers to do my laundry and buy me groceries. Why? Well, I just don't want to feel dependent on her, even though she does help me with things and tries harder now.
I asked myself why I want to see her less, I tell her I want time to work hard , to make money so we can live together but at the same time I am questioning if I can be with her forever. I do love her but it feels like I can't stand some of the things she says or asks anymore.
What's wrong with me? Just feel like she never understand me and I am always pressured by her.
She is always negative and complains about her days 3-4 days of the week.
I don't even want to sleep with her that much anymore.
Also I do all the work, she is lazy and never likes to try much.
I do not mind doing the work but in 5 years she has only made me finish ONCE!
I have to do the work to finish! Being a guy, I think sex has 50% to do with it.
I cannot picture myself being with her forever anymore.
She also gained 50 lbs since we met!
I don't want it.
I feel fed up and shot tempered with her now. I actually feel just like her.
I tell her to leave me alone, I hang up on her over the phone all the time.
80% of our relationship has been over the phone.
WHAT TO DO WHERE TO GO SHALL I KEEP TRYING?
I feel like I am here to cheer her up all the time when she has a bad day, but when I am having one, it's usually because of an argument with her!
And she is just annoying me now
When we met I kept it totally honest with her, especially about the 2 baby girls I have from a previous relationship, but she lied about a few things.
First one was not being a virgin, told me that she didn't want me thinking I got the best of her. She thought I would just be a fling. I told her it's OK, what's done is done and now that she loves me she says she wants me to believe she is a virgin, I told her OK if you say so! She got mad! Haha
She asked me to promise things to her like,
"Tell me you wont ever leave me"
"Tell me you love me"
"Let's be together forever"
I took a chance and decided for the first time to actually try these things.
Over the last 5 years she has broken up with me about twice to 3 times a year.
During 2 years while she was in grad school, we made a pact to see each other by taking turns, we each visit every other month. This never happened and I ended up going down every single time. We were only 400 miles apart. Her reasons were, being busy in school and having a part time job so I just said it's all right and sucked it up. Went to see her almost every other month for the 2 years.
During her time at school she made me go buy a web cam to chat and talk every single night! Sometimes I was working and she would beg me to go home just so she could see me on the web cam, which I did. I never said no to any of her requests. My life was for her.
But there came the arguments.
Every time she got upset her words ring in my head today " this means we weren't meant for each other" " We can't be together"
"Why don't you go find someone else" "I'm doing this for you, so you can be happy"
It broke my heart but I kept my words and was always there when she decided to come back. This may sound stupid or I just feel stupid at this point. Sucker for love!
Most of the time she felt like I was blaming her for things when I only wanted her to understand how certain things make me feel.
Then graduation time came and she broke up with me again, I say about the 6th time! I secretly wanted to surprise her and bought tickets to fly down to see her at graduation, she signed into my plane account and canceled my ticket so I didn't end up seeing her at the graduation and no refund. She ignored me for about 2 months after she moved back. So we get back together again and things were OK.
About 1 year later we planned to go so a festival together then she invites her mom and half brother along. She picks me up and I have a stomach ache from eating pizza late and falling asleep. I dare not cancel or stay home and also would know I can recover later in the day. During the ride down, I said my stomach hurts but instead of comforting me I guess I annoyed her. She promptly tell her mom how annoying and troublesome I am.
I told her, " If I knew you would say that I would have just shut up" in response to her comment, she hen says, " Yea, why can't you just sit there and shut up!" By this time I got fed up with her talking to me that way in front of her mom and half brother and said, " Don't talk to me that way!" and she was yelling and throwing a fit while driving. I told her to calm down and she just started going off like " you want to see crazy!" I was scared because we were traveling 70mph in a van and she was driving erratically and irrationally. She then backhands me in the face~! Haha, it's funny now when I think about it but she did give me a bloody nose and the erratic driving continued! I had to grab the steering wheel from the passenger side and tell her to slow down and calm down, I thought she was going to crash and kill all of us. We got off the exit and I got out of the car and told her I never wanted to see her again.
So now it's been over 2 years since and we stayed friends with benefits, she would not move on and I never let her go. All her friends and family didn't know I existed anymore. I never moved on until last year, I actually was dating someone she knew, which is no big deal but on new years, she calls me after not talking for about 3 months and says we will get back together. I actually moved on or have started to date other girls by this time and I decided to say OK again and dump the other girl.
Now this is where everything changes.
I stopped putting up with her cr*p!
I feel more annoyed of her.
She asks me questions she already asked me and it annoys the heck out of me!
I find myself wanting to be alone most of the time and busy working on my own goals and business. What used to be me begging for her to come and see me, is now her trying to see me and I find myself saying no and refusing her offers to do my laundry and buy me groceries. Why? Well, I just don't want to feel dependent on her, even though she does help me with things and tries harder now.
I asked myself why I want to see her less, I tell her I want time to work hard , to make money so we can live together but at the same time I am questioning if I can be with her forever. I do love her but it feels like I can't stand some of the things she says or asks anymore.
What's wrong with me? Just feel like she never understand me and I am always pressured by her.
She is always negative and complains about her days 3-4 days of the week.
I don't even want to sleep with her that much anymore.
Also I do all the work, she is lazy and never likes to try much.
I do not mind doing the work but in 5 years she has only made me finish ONCE!
I have to do the work to finish! Being a guy, I think sex has 50% to do with it.
I cannot picture myself being with her forever anymore.
She also gained 50 lbs since we met!
I don't want it.
I feel fed up and shot tempered with her now. I actually feel just like her.
I tell her to leave me alone, I hang up on her over the phone all the time.
80% of our relationship has been over the phone.
WHAT TO DO WHERE TO GO SHALL I KEEP TRYING?
I feel like I am here to cheer her up all the time when she has a bad day, but when I am having one, it's usually because of an argument with her!
And she is just annoying me now