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View Full Version : Is there any hope with my boyfriend?


confusedfornow
Mar 11, 2012, 03:08 PM
Hi my boyfriend is incredible and smart. Very philosophical and strives for virtue. However, he gets angry at the drop of a hat. We argue over little things and big things.. I think he has anger issues but he says he is justified in his anger because of.. (enter philosophical value here) its just too much sometimes. He says he's not yelling when he is and I am the one who is always 'wrong' and has to apologize. We moved to his home state together (I always wanted to move here) and I'm scared and feel alone without my family who he dislikes. I was abused as a girl for 5 years and my boyfriend blames everyone not just my abuser. Even though they had no idea until I told them.. He gets mad when I ask for him to not yell.. And doesn't like when I try to justify my perspective. Only a YES OR NO to further his argument and prove he's right. I'm 26, he's 29... What should I do? I'm scared he is becoming an angry person.

Wondergirl
Mar 11, 2012, 03:39 PM
Um, he already IS an angry person!

The second he gets upset and angry about something, don't say a word, but just calmly walk out of the room and busy yourself with something productive. If he has no audience or person to fight with, what's left for him to do?

Someone has to be the adult in the room. Let it be you.

Next, find a couples counselor. If he won't go, go by yourself. Even if this relationship doesn't last, you'll be given tools for future relationships.

talaniman
Mar 12, 2012, 07:28 AM
I don't know how long you have been together, but I suspect you have only seen the good, and are just now seeing the bad. Time to make a decision for yourself, because I doubt seriously that he is just changing into an angry person, you have just started to see him the way he is, not the way you want him.

Love blinds us in the beginning, and now the truth is surfacing.

mmresd
Mar 12, 2012, 12:19 PM
Afraid he is becoming an angry person?

He is a controlling, power seekings, and very angry person. Time to break up, only a matter of time before verbal abuse turns into physical.