View Full Version : Can you stop a father from seeing his children or child if he is convicted of rape?
Mrlee
Feb 2, 2012, 04:45 PM
Can a mother stop her ex partner from seeing there children or child if he has a history of drink, drugs and violence and has also been convicted and sent to prison for rape!
Lance69
Feb 2, 2012, 07:34 PM
Please elaborate. Has he displayed this behavior around his children? Are they in danger when he's around? Do you feel comfortable with him around his kids? What state are you in?
Fr_Chuck
Feb 2, 2012, 08:43 PM
You can of course try, The court will view if any current behavior is a threat to the child,
He may of course if out of jail still get visits, but the court may require they be supervised. There are many types of visits and levels of visits courts may order.
So often they may not stop visits merely control them.
Mrlee
Feb 3, 2012, 01:18 AM
Basically he is still inside for his crime and is due to come out soon! His behaviour of drink and drugs was displayed in front of his child and often police have had to be called because he would try and kick down the front door and display violent behaviour when drunk so my partner would not let him in and called the police!
ScottGem
Feb 3, 2012, 04:26 AM
Basically he is still inside for his crime and is due to come out soon!
The purpose of prison is, at least partially, to rehabilitate criminals. So you don't know if he has changed in prison. Some people actually do come out of prison as better people.
So, if he wants visitation, he can go to court, get testimony from the warden or PO that he is a changed man and, possibly, get visitation. It will probably be supervised at first.
Is there any visitation order currently in place? If so, the mother needs to go to court and ask that the visitation order be removed. That will force him to go to court and prove he has changed to reinstate it.
Mrlee
Feb 3, 2012, 05:33 AM
No there isn't! But he is only doing half his sentence witch tells me he has been going by the book! My partner dose not want anything to do with him anymore and I feel the same as I don't think a rapist is a suitable parent no matter what rehab he has gone through and the changes he has made! He raped a women off the street and beat her up at the same time, he had a sexual eurge and carried it out! Also my partner will never feel safe being around him I.e coming to see his child or collecting and I don't to. He has tried to force himself on her when they were together to the point he managed to pull her bottoms off and touched her, luckily she got away before it got any worse, she did tell the police when he got arrested for the crime he done but never went any further with it because she felt uncomftable speaking about it.
ScottGem
Feb 3, 2012, 05:48 AM
I don't think a rapist is a suitable parent no matter what rehab he has gone through and the changes he has made!
Sorry, but that won't be up to you or the mother. It will be up to a court.
If there is no order now, then she can refuse him access, but if he goes to court, there is a likelihood that he will get some level of visitation if he can prove to the court that he has been rehabilitated.
Mrlee
Feb 3, 2012, 06:12 AM
Ok and if that happened will my partner have to face him?
Basically he is a nasty bit of work and has a history with the police and its not the first time he has been inside! I just hope the judge has children to see that this man has no ability to be a dad as he has never been there in the child's life and when he had the chance he was out drinking and taking drugs all day and night!
JudyKayTee
Feb 3, 2012, 07:22 AM
Yes, if your "partner" takes him to Court to remove visitation or argue against visitation they'll be in the same Courtroom. Also, men who rape adult women are not child molestors and the other way around. It's not a "given."
I agree with Scott - "he" will make an argument that he's been rehabed. The best argument your "partner" can make (and keep in mind that you have no input in this, this is not your issue no matter how close you are) is that visitation should be supervised IF visitation is awarded.
And if I were the Judge I would question why your "partner" was involved with this unsavory, unsuitable, violent, drug-addicted rapist in the first place and why she had children with him. More than one child, correct? He has a history of drink, drugs, violence and rape - correct?
How many times did she report his behavior to the Police as domestic violence? That will matter.
Please don't misunderstand what I am saying - I don't think anyone who is a danger to a child should be allowed in the presence of the child, unsupervised BUT unless your "partner" reported the father's conduct to the Police at the time it happened it's too late to explain now that he was dangerous but...
Mrlee
Feb 3, 2012, 07:36 AM
No he only has one child with her and like most people he didn't show his true colours at the start! And when she fell pregnant she done all she could to try and help him change for her child's sake! And yes a lot of the time she had to call the police to take him away and has police reports but never spoke out about her own attack by him! I know it has nothing to do with me as it was before me but please understand that I am a worried partner. She finished with him soon after her attack but sexual assult is a very hard thing to talk about when it's a partner that dose it! And it happenes in a lot of relationships that people won't speak out about it because it was there partner! No is no at the end of the day!
JudyKayTee
Feb 3, 2012, 07:41 AM
No need for all the exclamation points - I understand your concern and upset.
I well understand how difficult it is to talk about domestic assault and/or sexual assault. I was the adult victim of rape - I well know how difficult it is to discuss it BUT when there is a child involved it's a different story, particularly if the child might be in danger.
You say "children." Are other children involved?
Yes, no is no, but it's her word against his and I well understand that.
I think you have to wait to see what the father does and then base your course of action on that.
ScottGem
Feb 3, 2012, 09:09 AM
If he does win supervised visitation, then an arrangement can be made to turn the child over to the supervisor so she doesn't have to come into contact with him. But she will need to face him in court.
Fr_Chuck
Feb 3, 2012, 09:12 AM
It all depends on if the court allows visits, and if so what type. In Atlanta for example, there are centers where non custody parents can visit with their children, it is in a controlled environment with staff workers present. The parent with custody takes child, and the other parent comes and visits. If they do see each other it is again, in a controlled area with staff present.
In other cases, the court will order the exchange of the child to take place ( if non custodial gets to take child) but the exchange takes place at a fire house or at a police station, so the non custodial parent does not get to come to the home of the children.
You need an attorney to walk you though all the possible steps, if he wants visits after he gets out of jail.
Mrlee
Feb 3, 2012, 09:22 AM
No but she is having my baby and I don't want any hastle coming to my door and have to worry that when I'm not there and at work that he might come round and try the same thing! And yes facing him in court is not a problem as that's what she will have to do then she will do it but apart from that never again! And if she dose lose and he gets access can she avoid seeing him until the child is old enougth to go on there own!
This is a messed up world and thank you for the advice.
ScottGem
Feb 3, 2012, 09:23 AM
As we have said, there are ways to turn the child over and avoid contact.