So I was dating this guy for nearly 4 years. Just before Christmas he got a little distant, anytime I asked if something was wrong I always got a "no" reply. He did not want to come see me Christmas day which I understood as he said he was spending it with his family. He ignored me then up until the day after new years day when he told me he had a new girlfriend and they have been seen each other a wile now.

He refused to speak about it cutting all contact with me until 2 nights ago where he rang but I never picked up. We spoke for a while yesterday and he told me that our relationship was dead and buried when he got with her which is far from the truth.

I am absolutely devastated. I have been out of work since it has happened and I just feel like I can't go on. I tried contact him today and he replied via text "yesterday was wrong we shouldn't have spoke do not contact me again".. I feel I need answers before I can get closure or try move on.. Anyone any suggestions? PLEASE X

What exactly are you looking for? He's told you he met someone else, he's in a relationship with her, his end of your relationship is "dead and buried," he doesn't think you should speak and he wants no further contact.

I'd stay away. He's told you loud and clear how he feels and I'm afraid you will ultimately embarrass yourself if you continue to try to press for answers.

How old are the two of you? You were alone on New Years Eve and didn't wonder where he was/what he was doing?

I am 24, he's 26... I just don't understand why or how he could even do it. He was still living in my house sleeping in my bed and honestly out of nowhere this came. 4 years and you don't think I deserve an explanation?? I new there was something wrong after Christmas when he just wouldn't talk to me or never called to my house.

In your title it says he was your ex, so why did you expect him to see you for the holidays? How long had you been broken up? WHY did you break up?

He gave you his degree of closure. He does not want to be with you, he is with someone else. The why is immaterial. Leave him alone so you can heal.

He stopped cheating on you by telling you the truth, and then he tells you that he doesn't want you to contact him anymore because he is romantically involved with someone else now. Stop contacting him, and make your life somewhere else, he has moved on.

Well yeah he wasn't my ex when he was meeting up with her and over the holidays he was still my boyfriend... were only broken up since he told me he had a new girlfriend so about 3 weeks now... yeah I suppose ye are right don't contact him let myself heal and move on... can't make someone love or stay with me..

The dirty b@stard!!

Very helpful talaniman! :)