My husband of over 12 years wants to separate and I would assume at some point divorce. What advice can anyone give as far as how I should protect myself at this point. We don't own a home but we both own cars in each others name. We also share a bank account. Our insurance is from his job and I am currently looking for my own full time job. All advice appreciated.

Sorry, I meant to add that we live in New York but were married in South Carolina. As of this moment nothing has been filed yet.

You must must seek legal advice from a good matrimonial attorney. Sounds like, given your situation, you are at high risk of loss of equities and assets

You must must seek legal advice from a good matrimonial attorney. Sounds like, given your situation, you are at high risk of loss of equities and assets


Why do you think the OP will lose equities and assets? She's in NY, married twelve years. It would appear that he works. She is looking for employment.

My husband of over 12 years wants to separate and I would assume at some point divorce. What advice can anyone give as far as how I should protect myself at this point. We don't own a home but we both own cars in each others name. We also share a bank account. Our insurance is from his job and I am currently looking for my own full time job. All advice appreciated.


I'm also in NY. Its where you live, you residency that matters, not where you were married. That appears to be NY.

Do you want to separate?

At any rate at this point any movement of assets could be seen as an attempt to hide or disguise assets or worth. I would suggest that you make an appointment with a matrimonial Attorney in your area, present the situation to him/her. It will probably be recommended that you and your husband (probably through separate Attorneys) negotiate a Separation Agreement (which will cover every aspect of your finances and assets). That Separation Agreement is then signed, notarized, filed. You live apart for a minimum of one year. At the end of that time you file for divorce AND that Separation Agreement (and living apart for one year) is the grounds for your divorce. The divorce is granted in accordance with the terms and conditions of that Agreement.

I think you can see that if you agree to something now and enter into a Separation Agreement without counsel you could ultimately harm yourself financially, particularly if you are not working at the present time and he carries your health insurance.

Of course, you can enter into the Separation Agreement, reconcile... and tear up the Agreement.

I thank everyone for their responses. I don't want to separate but my spouse is determined to leave and he has already started to change things like his life insurance policy. I'm not sure what else he is changing but I have been warned that he could take all of the money in our bank account and run.

You need legal representation before you are destitute.