View Full Version : I messed up, so how do I make it up to him?
cournoyer94
Oct 29, 2011, 07:08 PM
Ok backstory: This is my second big mess up in my relationship. First, I made him drive 2 hours (long distance relationship) to come see me in the middle of the night and then passed out, making him wait another 3 hours once he got here until I woke up to let him inside (around 2am) and then kicked him out again at 4am because my parents weren't supposed to know he came over. I know, I felt horrible. But he forgave me. That was over the summer.
Yesterday night, I invited him to come stay over tonight but then I had a change of plans and I texted him to tell him that I had to cancel and I would call him when I knew if he could still come or not. Well, he didn't get that text and he drove down in the pouring rain this evening. And when he got here, I took him out to dinner and then sadly had to send him home! So he had to drive all this way and then all the way back! I didn't have a choice because my parents made me but now he has to go explain to his parents why he drove all this way and then had to go back after a 2 hour, unsatisfying visit. I have never felt so inconsiderate and tacky in my life. I am seriously fearing for the well being of our relationship.
Please help me think of a way to make it up to him! It has to be something really good! (but, you know, economical.) I love him so much and I just want to make it right.
Duvexy
Oct 30, 2011, 12:01 AM
Next time you drive the two hours to see him and let him stay home. Buy, him a nice gift worth staying home for.
cournoyer94
Oct 30, 2011, 10:25 AM
Do you have any ideas about what I could get him? I want it to be something personal that reminds him of me but also maybe something fun. He likes doing technical lighting, sailing, and he is a pilot.
Duvexy
Oct 30, 2011, 01:56 PM
An electronic clock would do great seeing that he does a lot. He is going to have to have a clock to wake him up.
guitarteacher18
Oct 31, 2011, 03:34 AM
How about a GPS system
talaniman
Nov 3, 2011, 05:19 PM
How about a gift of your time doing nice inexpensive couple stuff so he will have memories of a great time. A day together, breakfast, lunch, and fun in between then a nice dinner, and curl up with a movie.
Give your time, not just a gift, he has earned it.
cournoyer94
Dec 5, 2011, 05:50 PM
Thanks guys! Our relationship is back on track and stronger than ever! But if you could see my other question, I need help on xmas present ideas.
Once again, he likes flying (he is a pilot), sailing, lighting, and xbox. But the present can also be ideas about what relate to our relationship. I want some ideas for a really great present for him! He tries to be sneaky but I am pretty sure he got me a really expensive piece of jewellery possibly w a sea lion on it because he knows I want to be a sea lion trainer after college. Please someone help me think of something amazing for this amazing guy. He is the love of my life and deserves nothing but the best! One idea I had was a camera that connects to his plane so it tapes his flying but it is waaayyy out of my price range. Any ideas help and I can answer more questions about him if needed! Thanks!
cournoyer94
Dec 5, 2011, 06:58 PM
Right, more boyfriend questions! Woot woot. OK so he is literally obsessed w call of duty. So I get a little offended every time I am trying to initiate some "playful behavior" and he has a COD date! We are in a long distance relationship so I don't think he would ever focus on anything but me when I am over but we were video chatting and I started getting very seductive and he had to go play COD w his buddies. I am totally fine and respect his space and I too love video games. So I tried to take involvement and ask if I could play w him, but he refused saying that it is his source of relaxation and enjoyment and I would ruin that?! So I got offended and we had our 2nd major fight. I mean, I'm not going to invite him shopping but if he wanted to come just once in a while, I wouldn't refuse. Is it possible he doesn't want me interacting w his friends, he can get jealous and one is my ex. But anyway, I digress. While allowing him time to play (and yes he does dedicate tons of time to me, he recently dropped out of a lighting job because I wanted to spend a weekend w him even though I told him not to), should I be upset when I start slipping my bra off and he goes to play video games?
standing47
Dec 5, 2011, 07:26 PM
Listen love if your man doesn't know what he has then that's his loss if u came into me taking your bra off u would be in for one good tome
DaniCalifornia
Dec 6, 2011, 04:40 AM
How old are you both? How long have you been dating? If things are to get serious, you'd both need to make sacrifices. That's part of being in love.
X Dani
cournoyer94
Dec 6, 2011, 10:08 AM
We have been officially together for four months and we are both 18. So yeah, young but we have both been in other serious relationships and agree this is a very strong relationship. Plus, could you guys maybe suggest possible xmas present ideas for me to give him?
DaniCalifornia
Dec 6, 2011, 12:12 PM
Well if you both agree it's serious then yeah you need to work together. Have you spoken to him properly? (We can often come across nagg-y with situations like this, try to avoid that)
I'd advise against a game then haha, that'd send the wrong message.
Depends what kind of couple you are. You could get him a jokey t-shirt. Or an engraved beer glass, depending on whether he drinks. Something like that?
X Dani
talaniman
Dec 7, 2011, 02:59 PM
Might I suggest that rather than trying to get his attention, when he is on his games then get busy having fun without him.
cournoyer94
Dec 8, 2011, 05:58 AM
Dani- thanks yes I have. We got in a big fight but we are closer because of it. I think ill have another discussion though because it happened again. I'm glad you said that because I almost got him a game! But he doesn't drink. So the tshirt idea is nice and also he snowboards and is a pilot so I was thinking I could get him some gear or something? Or like, do guys like watches, maybe a nice engraved one?
talaniman- I like the way you think haha
DaniCalifornia
Dec 8, 2011, 06:38 AM
A watch is definitely a nice idea, it's both thoughtful AND useful too.
X Dani