Hi,
I'm new to this site but I thought it looked pretty helpful, so here goes.
I work with this guy, he seems to be a really nice guy and we get on really well. He knows I'm attracted to him, but he gives me no feedback on what he thinks... I also got out of a serious relationship little over a month ago, and he knows this. What confuses the hell out of me is that every time I lose all hope and accept the fact that he's not interested in that way he does something to confuse me again. We don't speak much at the office, he's on the road a lot and doesn't spend much time in the office. Every weekend he sends me text messages to find out what I'm doing and where I am. What does all of this mean? I thought I could tell that he was attracted to me, but then he acted all shocked when he found out that I was attracted to him. I really don't get it. Is he acting like this just because he's really shy? Should I give up or not?
Please help!!
Thanx:confused:

From what you write here I don't know if I would say that he is attracted to you. Just sending you text messages doesn't mean anything. Unless your leaving something out my guess is he is just interested in what your doing on the weekend.

That being said, if he was interested he probably doesn't want to become a rebound and if your only a month out of a serious relationship. Then maybe you shouldn't worry about guys at this time. For hiim it would be a wasted effort and for you, I assume your still having feelings as it relates to the ex so it wouldn't be fair to him either way.

Maybe he is friendly and you are reading way too much into his messages. I think your reaction is a holdover from the feelings from your last relationship.

Okay, so I did leave a little bit out, coz' I didn't want to make it sound as bad as it was. About 2 weeks before my ex and I split up we had our end of year function at work, after the function we all went back to my place to carry on the party, my ex (current at the time) was too caught up with one of our other friends that was there and this guy that I work with kept making moves on me. We kept holding each other and once or twice we moved in for a kiss but there was always someone around, so nothing much happened. I didn't say anything in my initial q coz' I didn't exactly turn him down, which is probably part of the reason why my ex and I split up. Now what advice do you have for me? Am I still reading too much in to it? I'm not going to be heart broken or anything if he's not keen, I preety much just have a physical attraction to him, well that's all I'd be interested in pursuing anyway, I'm just not in the mood for anything serious at the mo. So what do you reckon?

So, if any of you remember my first post pertaining to the guy that I work with it's about him again. If you don't here's what's been going on.
Over the past few months him and I have got closer and closer to something finally happening, it was made perfectly clear by both of us that that's what we wanted... So anyway, like 3 weeks ago the other guy I work with (his best friend) says that this guy is really shy and I need to make the first move. So nothing happens but the next weekend as I'm leaving the office on the Friday they ask me what I'm up to over the weekend, they say they'll give me a call if I promise to go out with them. So the Saturday night comes and they call and ask what I'm doing, I was at home so I told them this. They later ask if they can come over, so I said yeah sure, even though it was like 3am! So they come over and we just chilled a bit and had some drinks. What came out that night is that both of them are interested in me. I casually hooked up with the one I'm interested in and that was all good and well, coz' none of us really want a serious relationship, just we're attracted to each other. The next day he called to ask if I had a good time and everything, so I was pretty chuffed. Everything went fine at work so all 3 of us were happy.
Then, last weekend, Friday night they both start text messaging me to find out what I'm doing etc. they were at some club together. So his friend (the other one I work with) asked if he could come over. So I said yeah sure, I'm not sleeping anyway, whatever, even though it was like 3am again. So he came over to my place alone, and stuff happened between us.
I don't know if the one I'm interested in actually knows, or if this guy gave him a story about leaving the club early. So my question now is did I mess up with the one I like?
I know getting with his best friend isn't the best idea in the world, but after the weekend before I figured they had a strange friendship anyway...
I don't regret anything I've done, I'm having a great time. I just really don't want to mess things up.

I didn't see either of them much at work on Monday coz' they were at clients, but today I seen the one I like quite a bit and everything has been easing back to the way it was before.

I need advice. I know I can't undo any of this andperhaps it was against my better judgement, but it's not like any of us are actually serious.

Please advise...
:confused:

I would say, there is nothing to mess up, you like hanging with these guys, and even though you might like the one better. None of you are serious and I would just let it stand like that. Have fun and when you are ready to get serious, then you should take precautions. Good luck!

I'm a little confused. You say you like this one guy a lot. Then you say that there's nothing serious going on. Do you like the guy a lot or is it just casual fun? It can't be both.

If you like the one guy a lot you can pretty much be guaranteed you're not getting married if you screwed his best friend.

If you're just having a good time, hey, live it up baby! And, if you're just having a good-time and they don't mind it I'd have some other suggestions for you that may not be appropriate for this web site ;-)

Between single consenting adults, you can do whatever you want. But don't be stupid enough to think that them being friends, they don't talk and compare notes. They are happy to share you, since its okay with you. You must be one great booty call. Enjoy it, if it makes you happy, since no one is serious, but don't expect more from either of them.

Thanks for your advice, it's kind of made me feel a bit better.
Just to clear it up, I do like the one more, perhaps on a personality basis, but let's be honest, when they come round at like 2 in the morning I'm not looking to chat!

So yeah, I'm going to keep it up, I consider myself rather lucky to have these 2 very hot young men leaving the clubs to come see me in the middle of the night! It really is quite an ego booster!

Thanks so much for the advise, I'm going to keep the good times rolling!:)