Seiriuqni
Oct 8, 2011, 02:03 AM
- We are together from a year and two months
- He always texts/calls me ( on daily basis )
- He is very loyal and he almost doesn't talk to any girl so I won't be jealous
- He is funny, nice, merely supportive
However..
- When he gets angry, he gets extremely cold and never tries to fix any fight
- He has raised his voice couple of times before but I forgave him
- I have many problems at home and I don't go out at all so this whole summer I have been overly depressed and he was the only one I would share my stuff with.. I complain a lot ( I have social anxiety and lately I became annoyingly jealous, possessive and controlling but I'm fixing it and I'm better now).. However 2 weeks ago he got very angry because of my depression and complaining ( it was my mistake I know) and started raising his voice saying " that's it, I don't want to talk now, I want to sleep, I hate you right now, leave me alone".. However he apologized later and became extremely caring and loving.
However I'm so afraid of him.. I'm afraid of his anger and how uncontrollable he gets!. I am more of a " okay , its my fault" person.. While he is a man who never gets on his pride, though he would do anything to be with me, he would cancel dates with his friends for me and all this.. I know he loves me, but when we fight he totally changes to something else.. A person you can't talk to properly!
Do you guys think it's my mistake for being such a naggy, possessive person? And I should forget all this.. I love him to death and we are constantly thinking about marrying each other.. but deep inside I'm very scared! I grew up with a very violent father and I don't want him to reach this level too!. He is very preserved too, in a way that he would never "run" after me.. It usually takes time for him to actually make a move and fix a fight, but I never have the patience to wait so I usually make the first step to fix it..
Is this a healthy relationship ? What should I do to at least recover my pride ( for, metaphorically speaking , always seeking to fix everything even if he is wrong).. What should I do.. I want to make this work but I also don't want to be stepped on
PS: I am trying extremely hard to change and be a relaxing, less jealous and possessive girlfriend and it works.. He started calling me more and is not as distant as before.. So we are good! But how do I deal with the devil that comes out when we fight.. How do I get him to get more involved in fixing a fight.. I'm 21 years old and this is my first boyfriend so I'm not that experienced :) thank you
- He always texts/calls me ( on daily basis )
- He is very loyal and he almost doesn't talk to any girl so I won't be jealous
- He is funny, nice, merely supportive
However..
- When he gets angry, he gets extremely cold and never tries to fix any fight
- He has raised his voice couple of times before but I forgave him
- I have many problems at home and I don't go out at all so this whole summer I have been overly depressed and he was the only one I would share my stuff with.. I complain a lot ( I have social anxiety and lately I became annoyingly jealous, possessive and controlling but I'm fixing it and I'm better now).. However 2 weeks ago he got very angry because of my depression and complaining ( it was my mistake I know) and started raising his voice saying " that's it, I don't want to talk now, I want to sleep, I hate you right now, leave me alone".. However he apologized later and became extremely caring and loving.
However I'm so afraid of him.. I'm afraid of his anger and how uncontrollable he gets!. I am more of a " okay , its my fault" person.. While he is a man who never gets on his pride, though he would do anything to be with me, he would cancel dates with his friends for me and all this.. I know he loves me, but when we fight he totally changes to something else.. A person you can't talk to properly!
Do you guys think it's my mistake for being such a naggy, possessive person? And I should forget all this.. I love him to death and we are constantly thinking about marrying each other.. but deep inside I'm very scared! I grew up with a very violent father and I don't want him to reach this level too!. He is very preserved too, in a way that he would never "run" after me.. It usually takes time for him to actually make a move and fix a fight, but I never have the patience to wait so I usually make the first step to fix it..
Is this a healthy relationship ? What should I do to at least recover my pride ( for, metaphorically speaking , always seeking to fix everything even if he is wrong).. What should I do.. I want to make this work but I also don't want to be stepped on
PS: I am trying extremely hard to change and be a relaxing, less jealous and possessive girlfriend and it works.. He started calling me more and is not as distant as before.. So we are good! But how do I deal with the devil that comes out when we fight.. How do I get him to get more involved in fixing a fight.. I'm 21 years old and this is my first boyfriend so I'm not that experienced :) thank you