Hi friends actually I'm going through tough situation so kindly suggest me your suitable opinion. I'm in love with guy from past 10 years and I wanted to spend my rest of life with him.

But the problem is that we both are of same caste but the subcaste is different, so his family is not showing any positive response, so as mine. He always tell his parents that I will marry that girl only, but his parents are totally opposite and according to my view they think more about society that they will think. And he's asking me to do court marriage for safer side but I'm asking him to delay, because I don't want to hurt my parents. SO Kindly Suggest me something which could help out.

Your 10 years devotion shows that you love him too much. Now it's a time to love your parents also. love your parents and convince them that you love that guy but you don't go against your parents wishes because you love your Parents also very much. History tells us that no parents in the whole world are cruel. They understand you. But you must use the tool of COMMUNICATION. fill the gap between you and your parents.
I appreciate your regard to your parents. Because you avoid to take any other step which may humiliate your parents in society. BEST OF LUCK

Pinky, I have failed to understand one thing - i.e. the objection to intra-caste, inter-gotra(surname, as you call it) marriage!

As far as my understanding of the Indian Matrimony is concerned, I have perceived that in rigid Indian caste system, inter-caste and intra-gotra weddings are not allowed. But, objection to intra-caste, inter-gotra knot! Sounds eerie!

So, I plead you to clarify, after which I can suggest some way out. Still, the approach given by Dazzling, in the above post is really workable!

I agree with Dazzling83

At KahaniPUnjab-Yeh, its inter-gotra issue, and we both are punjabi but the surname is different. Now kindly suggest me

At DAZZLING83- yeah, I totally agree with you that's what I get scared of when talking to my parents because my dad is very much polite and light hearted, and the problem is that my mom is not showing any response. She's totally opposite. I think my dad will get agree. Yeah after doing court marriage they will not accept me. I wanted to make them convinced they should do my marriage with all rituals.


Edited/T

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/no-chat-speak-no-text-talk-303157.html

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/no-chat-speak-no-text-talk-303157.html



Have they met this guy, or have you tried a united approach together? Has he formally asked your parents for permission? Can you enlist a relative or trusted older person to aid you?

Can you drop the chat/text so we older folks can understand you better?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/no-chat-speak-no-text-talk-303157.html