Before I receive any comments defacing me as a person and my morals, please just keep them to yourself. I FULLY UNDERSTAND, how wrong it is to be head over heels for a man that is married; and I have always respected the value of a family.

I am hoping to receive any practical advice on how to back away from a relationship that has been very important to me in the past year or so.

A little background on our situation... I am a little past my mid 20's, and "Chris" is 35, with three children. I met "Chris" almost two years ago at our part-time job. I never thought twice about flirting with him, or having any other interest in him other than friends as coworkers. Our strictly friendship blossomed immediately, and I quickly grew to considering him one of my closest male friends. He was SO easy to talk to, so helpful, and so caring. We began chatting through our day-job emails, simply in a friendly manner. We never hung out outside of our work except for a few times with our other coworkers.

Then about a year ago we started doing lunch meetings, since we are in the business industry. Nothing seemed amiss or wrong to me, he was just a good friend! Then it happened.. A few months ago we were finishing a lunch and he kissed me out of the blue. I was shocked, kissed back, but only shortly and then left. At first I felt awful (well, I still feel awful,) but then it dawned on me, I am 100% in love with this man! I have gotten closer to him than I have gotten closer to so many, even closer than to a boyfriend that I had lived with for 5 years.

Since this incident, we both have admitted to being in love with each other. He wants to plan things together so we can spend more time with each other, but I am SO scared. Scared to make a poor decision that hurts another, scared to get hurt, scared to lose a best friend! We have kissed several more times since the first, and I can honestly say the chemistry I have with "Chris" is like no other.

Not that it matters, but I know for a fact he has never cheated on his wife until me (and yes, I actually know this.) How on earth do I break away from this? I can't imagine losing such a great friend, not to mention someone I am crazy in love with!

You are not going to like this, but you are going to have to give up the friendship and him. Trying to keep the friendship will only encourage the feeling of love to grow and bad behavior to happen.

I think No Contact (breaking off all communications abruptly) with him will be your best option. I know it will hurt to let him and the friendship go, but it will hurt less to do it now than later. If you do have to have contact with him due to work, keep it on a business level and do not encourage personal or intimate discussions.

If you try to keep the relationship and him, it will lead to hurting other people and damaging your own self-respect. I don't think you want to be 'the other woman' so please don't continue to put yourself in that position.

Take care of yourself and give yourself time and space to let him go. Good luck.

You either cut all contact or feel awful. Once you cross the lines of good behavior, there can be no friendship.

I would just like to share my story about my affair with a married man I am currently base in Singapore as a helper.
I am a Filipina, I have met one guy that I cannot forget until now. He is from Cebu, Phils.
I met him here because he is working in shipyard,he is the nicest guy I've ever met though.We had been attached and I fell
In love with him,since I only like seeing like once a week,every time we met I had the nicest sex ever. He always took photo of me
As well. He is the best guy ever in bed with me.I still fantasize him, I was hurt the time I saw a text message from someone. I suspect
He also seeing someone very new, during that time he started avoiding me.I tried my best to be with him again, sending him messages, calling him
But he always reject. Sometimes I still send email but I never get any reply. He was the best guy for me have met few guys but I cannot
Compare to him especially in bed.I have heard before that he went to Brazil to work and previously back to Singapore but I never get the chance
To see him again.I am still madly in love with him until now, I cannot forget him every time we ****.I hope I can find someone better in bed than him.
I hope I get the chance to see him again and spend time at least one day in bed again... Our relationship did not last long because
I know he keeps on looking for someone. I know that if anybody who gets to know him will really fell in love with this guy.I am hoping that his marriage
With his wife will end soon and hoping that he will comeback in singapore as I am still in love with him. I was no contact with him after Dec 2009.
I still missed and love him. He keeps taunting on my mind... I still Love him...



Edited personal info/T

Thank you both Cat and Talaniman. Deep inside I knew what needed to be done; however, I suppose I needed to hear it from others as well and obviously this is not a scenario to be discussed with family or friends. We do work together; however only during our part-time job, so this equates to about 10 hours a week. This Saturday will be the first time I work on keeping everything on a business level, and cutting out all unnecessary conversation. Thanks again for your insight.

Sunshine, remember that you can come back here and talk things out if you need to especially if you feel your resolve wavering.

You aren't going through this alone.

Good luck.

Cat, thank you so much! It is nice to hear such kind words and support. I will update with how Saturday night went on Monday!