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View Full Version : Did my good friend cross the line flirting with a man who hurt me?


LoveStoned
Sep 22, 2011, 06:18 PM
Hello everyone. I'm not sure if this was supposed to go with my passed questions. But In short, I was dating a guy and it didn't turn out so well. Anyway, up until a few days ago he was asking me " What was it going to take for me to talk with him." Then the night after he adds one of my best friends on FB. It tore me up. What is he trying to do? And my supposedly good friend waves him down even if I'm standing next to her whenever she sees him. She dating someone at the moment so I don't think she will date him. Especially knowing that he dates a lot at the same time thankx to me. I need advice how to handle this all. I'm just so confused. Am I being ridiculous for being annoyed with my friend? And what the heck is he trying to do?

Fr_Chuck
Sep 22, 2011, 06:31 PM
He added your friend as a FB friend and that is the issue ?
He may be doing it for many reasons. If you can't discuss this with your friend, then you are not really close anyway.

But so you stop dating him, broke up with him, ( or he with you) is there a reason your friend can't if they perhaps would be a better match perhaps

LoveStoned
Sep 22, 2011, 06:53 PM
He lied to me and tried to make it seem as if he wanted a relationship. Come to find out he was seeing 3 different girls and when I confronted him about it. He denied everything!I told him how I felt. I told him I really liked him but felt uncertain about things. He would give me the hot and cold treatment. So I told him in a rude way to leave me alone. Then continued to try to talk to me but I ignored him. My friend on the other hand, well it just showed me a lot by her doing that after she witnessed my sadness. She knows I got burned and then to happily bring him over to help him out? (We all work together) It just buggs me. Don't know why Im letting it bother me so much. But Im really upset with my friend. Although I haven't told her anything about it, my reactions and emotions towards her aren't the same. I feel as if I lost a level of trust.

talaniman
Sep 24, 2011, 01:25 PM
Some clear communications with your co worker would certainly help to clear things up, but the best solution is to back away from her business, and his, and that annoying feeling will fade once you have your own feelings under control. That takes time, since you have to work with these folks that are oblivious to the turmoil their interactions are causing you.

LoveStoned
Oct 2, 2011, 06:48 PM
Okay... so I wrote her an email letting her know how I felt. She apologized and said she didn't realize the things that she has done. She sounded very apologetic and we even hung out the day after. However, even though we talked about it, I still am holding a grudge that I really wish to let go. I have asked to be transferred to another place of business just so I can make sure I don't have to witness and stay out of their business. She found out about me wanting to move and then asked me if everything was okay. And maybe we should talk face to face. I said okay and no response after that..
My issue is all about good friends having a level of respect for one another. You don't start becoming friendly friednly and flirting up a guy who hurt your supposedly best friend as she proclaimed to be.

talaniman
Oct 2, 2011, 07:05 PM
Let it go LS, she will have to learn on her own. This holding of a grudge is a bit more than you need. Especially when you are so mad you seek to rearrange your whole life over this.

That can't be healthy for you.