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v1x1n1y1y1
Jun 11, 2011, 12:13 AM
So I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now and I just wanted to know opinions on marriage. We always talk about marriage and families and I have a feeling he is going to pop the question by next year. Is it too quick? How do I know if he is the right one? Is there such thing as being too young to fall in love? All of these things runs through my mind when thinking about the topic of marriage and it scares me but it also feels right somehow. Any stories to share?.

BK201
Jun 11, 2011, 12:30 AM
They say, think and picture the future with your partner. I have seen so many marriages arranged by parents and they are living a happy happy life. But that doesn't mean that they don't have any problems, they do. It is the understanding, love, and trust they have for their partner which keeps them get going. As long as you know that he loves you more than anybody else, and he knows that you are that one person who can understand him more than anybody else, nothing should stop you from getting married. Bet you are not a minor.
Best Wishes

cassicat4
Jun 11, 2011, 03:13 PM
How old are you now?
Between 18-25 years is the time when people's personalities are constantly changing and ultimately being defined. My psychology prof was a strong advocate that people should be hesitant to making any major commitments (e.g. marriage) to someone during this time as you're still trying to figure out yourself, much less someone else.
That being said, there is absolutely no harm in waiting, especially if you aren't ready. If this guy is the one you're meant to be with for the rest of your life, he will respect your need to wait until you are ready.
Speaking from personal experience, I wish I had been older when I got married, and that I had done so for the right reasons. I had been with my boyfriend for 7 years when he proposed. However, I wasn't ready to get married (I was 22). Family and friends all thought it was a great idea though, so I quelled all my nerves and told myself repeatedly that it was the right thing to do, we'd been together long enough, it's what I as a woman was supposed to do... but ultimately it was the wrong decision because he wasn't the right one for me. We divorced after a year.
What I would have done differently had I lived it all again, was listened to my heart and my gut instead of trying to convince myself otherwise. Make sure he is the one for you. You will know when he is. I would have waited until I was older, because I have changed a lot in terms of my views and goals in life since then. People either grow together or grow apart. If you two are able to weather the storms, work together, grow together, you can make it last.
Make sure you talk about your vision for marriage before you even consider going that route. In my case, my ex wanted children and to save all of our money for retirement. I don't want kids, and I want to travel. We clashed, we fought, we fell apart. My best guy friend is in the same situation. He wants kids, his wife does not. He wants to work in another province, she wants to stay here with her family. They have recently separated because they cannot agree. Communication is your friend. I cannot emphasize that enough.
Best of luck to you both. :)

superstar18
Jun 11, 2011, 10:09 PM
I would give it time. I have been dating my boyfriend for 4 years now and we have talked about getting married and having a family too. Our relationship started really well, but this year our relationship went downhill. Don't rush things too quickly, If I were you I would wait to see how your relationship goes. Maybe a couple of years or so and see how your relationship is going.

v1x1n1y1y1
Jun 13, 2011, 11:26 PM
Thanks you guys, it was helpful.
The truth is I do think he is the one. We dated when we were in high school but broke up because of complications and now we are back together. It's just whenever I am with him it just feels so right.But although I don't know if us being unable to stay away from each other for more than two days a good or bad thing? Those days just seem so long for the both of us. But I will consider all the alternatives and see where it's going to take us. Thanks again you guys! :)