View Full Version : May 22, 2011
dwashbur
May 22, 2011, 12:47 PM
Since all the real Christians got raptured yesterday, I assume this board will be needing a new name... :D
Curlyben
May 22, 2011, 12:55 PM
I have no idea what you could be possibly referring to ;)
I'm still here so I guess you can draw your own inferences from that..
Wondergirl
May 22, 2011, 01:14 PM
*Hi, guys! Hi, everybody!*
After we all got raptured, I was given my very own fluffy cloud. I've named it "Little Cloud" or LC (like Elsie hee hee). LC and I are having a great time floating around in the heavens. I can see Exy and his island of naked chicks (not getting raptured didn't bother him one bit!). I was given kitchen privileges, so soon will be baking the desserts for tomorrow's menu. I've requested a second rapture, so maybe you guys will make the cut the next time. Every now and then, look up and wave to me, so I know you miss me.
dwashbur
May 22, 2011, 02:02 PM
*Hi, guys! Hi, everybody!*
After we all got raptured, I was given my very own fluffy cloud. I've named it "Little Cloud" or LC (like Elsie hee hee). LC and I are having a great time floating around in the heavens. I can see Exy and his island of naked chicks (not getting raptured didn't bother him one bit!). I was given kitchen privileges, so soon will be baking the desserts for tomorrow's menu. I've requested a second rapture, so maybe you guys will make the cut the next time. Every now and then, look up and wave to me, so I know you miss me.
Just a cloud? How common! I had him drop me off on Mars. Yesterday I took a walk to the edge of the Valles Marineris to see what a REAL grand canyon looks like; today I'm climbing to the top of Olympus Mons just to prove I have a perfect body now. Tomorrow I'm going to bop down to the southern hemisphere and see if that really is a face that Mariner saw... ;)
hauntinghelper
May 22, 2011, 02:54 PM
Wondergirl, put in a good word for me! I didn't leave my church like we were told so I guess I'm stuck here until October.
Fr_Chuck
May 22, 2011, 03:24 PM
Naw, churches would be fuller than ever the Sunday after rapture, more people would go to find religion then than ever
dwashbur
May 22, 2011, 04:42 PM
Naw, churches would be fuller than ever the Sunday after rapture, more people would go to find religion then than ever
But there wouldn't be anybody there to teach them!
hauntinghelper
May 22, 2011, 04:57 PM
Oh, I'm sure there will be some left over "Christians".
Fr_Chuck
May 22, 2011, 06:27 PM
You are of course assuming that all christians would be wisked away, with the last survey in the Church of England that over 5 percent of their Priests did not even believe there was a god, there will be plenty of churches and preachers.
But besides that, the empty ones will fill with new people who just found their faith. The best preaches are the ones where were the worst sinners and found God.
classyT
May 23, 2011, 07:57 AM
Well I have no desire to sound like headstrongboy or any of Camping's followers, BUT there will be a rapture of the church. It WILL happen according the bible. But it won't be doomsday nor will anyone be able to predict the day or hour. I don't think it is anything to take lightly.
That is ONE of the may problems with the May 21 thingy. It made Christians look stupid and the thought of a real rapture ridiculous. But I think it is a serious event that will take place one day.
speechlesstx
May 23, 2011, 09:53 AM
Harold Camping 'flabbergasted'; rapture a no-show (http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2011/05/22/BAKO1JJIK7.DTL&tsp=1)
You'd think he'd learn by now.
"But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone. -Matthew 24:36
dwashbur
May 23, 2011, 11:36 PM
Oh, I'm sure there will be some left over "Christians".
Agreed. But they wouldn't be the real deal, and if they didn't get taken then there's obviously something they didn't grasp. So it would be a case of the blind leading the blind.
Of course, all this is assuming the whole pretribulational rapture thing is corret at all, which it's not.
speechlesstx
May 24, 2011, 02:07 PM
Of course, all this is assuming the whole pretribulational rapture thing is corret at all, which it's not.
That's debatable.
After getting over being flabbergasted that the rapture didn't happen Saturday, he's had time to modify his response.
Preacher says world will actually end in October (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110524/ap_on_re_us/us_apocalypse_saturday)
Plenty of time to build up that nest egg some more, Rev?
Wondergirl
May 24, 2011, 02:11 PM
Plenty of time to build up that nest egg some more, Rev?
No, he also said there will be no need for advertising and printed materials to be made. God is no longer accepting converts. Thus, no donations will be needed or accepted for that purpose.
TUT317
May 24, 2011, 03:09 PM
No, he also said there will be no need for advertising and printed materials to be made. God is no longer accepting converts. Thus, no donations will be needed or accepted for that purpose.
What! Mr. Camping no longer accepting donations!
The wages of sin may be death but sounds like the pay will be poor and the hours long.
I think everyone should ignore him completely.
Tut
Wondergirl
May 24, 2011, 03:53 PM
no donations will be needed or accepted for that purpose.
What! Mr. Camping no longer accepting donations!
You can donate to keep him in steak and lobster, though. Earmark it for that.
speechlesstx
May 25, 2011, 06:30 AM
No, he also said there will be no need for advertising and printed materials to be made. God is no longer accepting converts. Thus, no donations will be needed or accepted for that purpose.
Family Radio Secure Donation Form (http://www.familyradio.com/donations/donationform.html)
Of course he's still asking for money.
J_9
May 25, 2011, 06:36 AM
I think Mr. Camping got it wrong with the earthquakes... Seems like it might be tornado's instead!
J_9
May 25, 2011, 07:32 AM
Mo, you okay? I've been worried about you.
dwashbur
May 28, 2011, 08:30 AM
Mo, you okay? I've been worried about you.
Agreed. Chime in here and let us know how you're doing.
hauntinghelper
Jun 4, 2011, 01:26 PM
Now THAT'S some advice!