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View Full Version : Is he playing me?


dakotaej
May 17, 2011, 05:10 AM
So, I met this guy at a dance I attended a couple months ago... We hit it off. We had a mutual friend there and we all hung out. We had such a fun time together, and later, me and the guy exchanged numbers. Before I left for home, the guy came up to me and said goodbye and gave me a little side hug. As I was on my way home, however, I got a text from the mutual friend warning me that the guy can be a little bit of a player. I brushed it off and replied saying, "Alright, I'll watch out." Anyway, the guy ended up coming to my soccer team. One of my other friends knew of him and told me the same. That the guy was a player. I was kind of surprised at this, but I brushed it off, though I was more careful. I was again texting my friend of 3 or so years, and it turns out that she knows a girl who used to go out with this guy. The girl who used to go out with the guy told me that he is a horrible player, checks out all girls he's around, and is incredibly perverted. In total, about 4-5 people gave me the same report... this was devastating, because, by this time, I had developed deep feelings for this guy. We are in a relationship, now, and he has proved to be faithful, he treats me right, isn't really perverted (but he's a guy, come on, all guys are kind of supposed to be perverted), and I don't observe him checking out other girls. I don't know what to believe! HELP!

ladymini
May 17, 2011, 06:00 AM
Sometimes, I believe that... a guy will not show his true colors until he gets what he wants from you..
But that's just my opinion.

adviceishere
May 17, 2011, 06:11 AM
OK so he was a player, no body knows if he still is, when or if he does do something to hurt you then you need to stop worrying until then. You got in a relationship with him, meaning your giving him the chance to prove himself, if he lets you down then you know what to do, in the mean time, stop worrying over something that hasn't happened and enjoy it.

Jake2008
May 17, 2011, 06:23 AM
People change, and the gossip you have been hearing has been all one-sided.

You will know soon enough if you are compatible or not.

In the meanwhile, I agree with Advice, try not to cloud your impression of him by what other people have to say- who do not have a vested interest.

Be as cautious as you would had you never heard a thing, and try not to pre-judge him from his past.

shaniene1993
May 17, 2011, 06:58 AM
he mite of been a player before but that is not to say he is playing you, maybe he realized he was sick of playing girls and wanted to settle down and be happy, after all he was going to have to grow up at some stage and realize he couldn't go on like that.
I think even though he may have a bad past you should give him a chance, if he hasn't hurt you up until now who ses he will!
Everybody has done bad things in their life but that doesn't say we should judge them on it.

you never know how it's going to work out till you give it a shot.

I wish
May 17, 2011, 11:28 AM
It's great that your friends gave you so much warning. But ultimately, you make your own decision. If he hasn't given you any reason not to trust him, then leave it alone.

However, if this continues to bother you, then maybe you can bring it up with him. Let him know that you heard rumors that he's a player, but you wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. See what he says about the rumors about him and go from there.

talaniman
May 17, 2011, 12:06 PM
The best way to go is go slow, and pay attention, while you have fun getting to know each other. Having deep feelings shouldn't make you blind. You have only been dating a very short time, so have fun, but don't give him your heart until he deserves it, and knows what to do with it.

ken007nielsen
May 17, 2011, 04:24 PM
Frankly, when your friends warns you of a guy, you should listen to them. Not brush it off and keep going, but what's done is done.

A person can play one person, and then commit to a serious relationship with another. So might have been the truth he'd been a player, but from what you have seen - he seems like a decent enough guy, so believe his actions and stop worrying about his past.

Of course you should still take it slow and be cautious with him, but no more than any other guy.

As Talaniman said ''Dont give him your heart until he deserves it''. So in short relax and enjoy your relationship