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View Full Version : Odd break up situation that is confusing me!


bigpapi4444
May 14, 2011, 02:07 AM
So my girlfriend and I have been together for just about 2 years now. The relationship overall has been wonderful and I feel that we are very compatible together. We get along great when we are with each other and have a lot of fun together.

However, 2 months ago we got into a fight that basically spawned from nowhere. We were both a little bit drunk and just started arguing. This was at her house and after I had left, she had gone over to a fraternity house to see one of her friends there. One of them in particular is a fraternity brother who I know that she is friends with, but at the time I did not feel that it was anything more.

After that situation she said that she needed a break. That our relationship was just too much. However, just a few days later she called me crying saying that she misses me so much.. So we ended up getting back together at that point. Things were going great again. However, the just last night we broke up. I am in China for an internship and she is back in the US. She broke up with me over skype, saying that I never took her on dates, and that I had become complacent in the relationship. Although I realize that we did not go on a TON of dates.. Its not like we didn't go on any.. We went to the movies before I left and went out to dinner as well. Anyway. . She was very angry and said that maybe she will be able to find someone who will want to take her on dates and go out with her. This made me really upset and angry. I basically said good luck and signed off skype. I signed back on a few hours later and she called me balling, saying that she misses me so much and that she is so lonely and that she still loves me but something needs to change. I agreed..

She said that she wants to start over anew when I get back. Like a complete start over.. But that is, at the earliest, two months from now. That is definitely something that I want. I love this girl to death and the past two months of arguing and such has truly been killing me. But I also don't want to get my hopes up. Two months seems like an eternity and I don't want to get my hopes up just to find out that this isn't going to happen.

The most confusing thing to me is the fact that we argued and she said all of these things about me becoming complacent and basically ruining the relationship, and then not 5 minutes later, she was crying and telling me that she misses me too much, that she still loves me and that she is so lonely and depressed. I am so confused. I was afraid of this because I know that she gets lonely easily, but I never thought that she would break up with me like this. And the start over?

Is she serious about that or is that just a back up plan for her? I need help.. I am so confused!

amicon
May 14, 2011, 04:59 AM
LDRs are nearly always difficult-how long have you been away?

And,how old are the two of you?

Nobody can tell you what her thoughts and plans are-except for her.

Have a proper discussion about your future-without the arguing and the crying.

Homegirl 50
May 14, 2011, 08:39 AM
Sounds like a lot of emotions. If she has asked for a break, give it to her. I would not plan on starting over in a couple of months. You both should move on and if you get together again fine, if you don't that is fine too.
Has she always been so back and forth with her emotions?
Talk to her, tell her your conerns. Don't let her make all the rules.

talaniman
May 14, 2011, 02:05 PM
What's so confusing? Every time she get a bug in her butt and dumps you you react, by taking her back again when the bug is no longer in her butt.

By now you know for a fact she is needy, insecure and has to have constant attention or she goes bonkers. Your solution is very simple you either don't leave her alone for long, OR take her butt with you when you leave, OR tell her to keep the bug out of her ***, then she won't go bonkers.

Just me, the first time she dumped me would be her last, and the problem would be solved to MY satisfaction. But I understand, she is the boss, and you are confused. So just do as she tells you and that should solve things too, don't you think?