Log in

View Full Version : What are the ways to make him love me again


onang
May 6, 2011, 12:48 AM
Do I need to greet the mother of my exboyfriend on mother's day?

Curlyben
May 6, 2011, 01:06 AM
No, why do you feel you should do ?

onang
May 6, 2011, 01:43 AM
Originally Posted by Curlyben
No, why do you feel you should do ?

Because I just met her last week and ever since, we're closed with each other and she's like a second mother to me. She told me that even though our relationship with her son ended I can still count on her as my friend.

amicon
May 6, 2011, 03:52 AM
Who broke up with who?

Are you over the ex?

If you are maybe a card would be ok-but if you're still healing,I'd say don't.

Fr_Chuck
May 6, 2011, 04:20 AM
How old are you and how long were you with your ex.

My "ex" of 20 years, her mother was like a mother to me after 20 years, and I normally did keep in contact with her.

Do you have kids with your ex ?

Cat1864
May 6, 2011, 06:27 AM
Was meeting her a week ago your first time meeting her or had you met before and it was more like visiting with her?

If it was the first time you met, then I wouldn't do anything for Mother's Day. It seems a bit too soon in your relationship with her. Perhaps next year, you might want to do something.

If it was visiting and getting to know each other better (confirming an existing relationship), then follow your instinct. Do you want to 'greet' her?

Another thought, is instead of doing something for Mother's Day, give her a token of your friendship that shows you care but is not tied to Mother's Day. Something that says thank you and that you are thinking of her. Treat her like a good friend who gives motherly advice.

J_9
May 6, 2011, 06:29 AM
Okay, I'm officially confused here.

This is your EX boyfriend?
You only met his mother a WEEK ago and she is like your second mother already?

mmresd
May 6, 2011, 11:25 AM
If you have finished with her son, then I would recommend you to stay away from her too at least until you are over him. Because if you don't, you might start using her as an excuse to see him without noticing. So back away and heal by yourself for a while. She will understand you distancing yourself because of the situation you have with her son.

Good luck,
Javi

vanheart
May 6, 2011, 08:45 PM
No. No Obligation. Who cares? She's not your Mother.

Don't be friends with your ex's Mom.

Your job is to get way from your ex. Who knows what her agenda is?
To help her son & herself hopefully, in the process. Who knows?

What's your agenda? I hope not trying to get back an ex.

Don't keep yourself surrounded in family drama that isn't yours. Sweet talk.

The point is, this is all about you & your ex. And exs are not in your life.
Don't try & weasel something that isn't right. You'll pay later.


Blood is thicker than ex girlfriends. Including their friends & family.

Forget all of this, his Mom, & look for real people, not BS'ers.

Disappear for a while. Months.

onang
May 8, 2011, 10:58 PM
What are the ways and tips on how to make my ex boyfriend love me again?I truly love him and I'm really sure of my feelings. Thanks hoping for your answers and effective ways because I believe that the love is still there.

amicon
May 8, 2011, 11:00 PM
You can't make anyone love you.

Did he break up with you?

You need to add more details-generally speaking,once it's over,it's over and you should focus on moving on.

onang
May 8, 2011, 11:08 PM
What are the ways and tips on how to make my ex boyfriend love me again?I truly love him and I'm really sure of my feelings. Thanks hoping for your answers and effective ways because I believe that the love is still there.

If you're thinking about someone everyday who became a part of your life before and shared good memories together, do you think that someone is thinking about you too?

ken007nielsen
May 9, 2011, 03:54 AM
It's certainly likely, but it's not certain.

There's a reason your not together anymore, despite your love it was not it enough to substain a relationship. I can only speculate since you have given little detail, so you should start moving on and stop visiting memory lane, since it will do you no good. There isent a magic trick you can do to make him love you again.

But fear not there's plenty of fish in the sea, and I promise you if you stop thinking of your eks and start focusing on your own life, in time others will become attracted to the free and happy girl that you can be once your healed. So instead of clinging onto your past, look forward!

onang
May 9, 2011, 04:22 AM
Thank you for that very remarkable message. Yes, I'm trying my best now to heal and improve myself. I should love myself first before anyone else does. I'm trying the NC rule right now. Thank you.:)

@ken007nielson->We've been together for a year and a half. I knew that he loved me truly and I really love him also. Things were great, we were happy together and suddenly he told me that he needed space to look for himself. He told me also that his feelings were not the same as before. I was kind of shocked so I tried my very best to show him that he was important and that I love him. We still communicate lately but now I decided to cut all contacts with him because I am the one who is suffering and being hurt a lot. Is this a good decision?

amicon
May 9, 2011, 05:09 AM
Yes,no contact is a very good decision;you need to heal from the break up and move on.

If you stay in touch with the ex,you'll slow down your own healing process.

onang
May 9, 2011, 05:28 AM
I am becoming really confused. A few weeks ago, almost eight months after my ex broke up with me. My best friend invited me to visit the house of his aunt because my ex boyfriend's mother is her aunt and they're cousins with my ex. I was kind of hesitant to go with them because of what happened to us. But then, I decided to go along with them because I also tried whether if I have gotten over him. Then, his mom hugged me. When I saw my ex we hugged each other and he kissed me. Before we left, we hugged each other tightly and he said that he missed me. I also told him that I truly missed him. When we left their house, my ex went with us because he was going to work that time. He remembered the memories that we had together. He was very sweet. I was confused. However I don't like to assume because he now has a girlfriend. What did those acts mean?Do you think he still loves me?

ken007nielsen
May 9, 2011, 06:07 AM
Onanq, not only is it a good decision it's the right decision for you to start feeling better.

He has you as a back-up, not that he ever intend to make use of it. But it's always nice to have one.

For me NC helped, delete/get rid of all pictures, Facebook, mobile nummber and avoid him like the plague. If you do that eventually you be healed from the hurt and what if your currently experiencing now.

Good call, I wish you the best of luck!

onang
May 9, 2011, 06:25 AM
Ok, thanks again. What if after several months of not contacting him... and for example he send a message out of the blue.. should I respond to him? Thank you.:)

amicon
May 9, 2011, 06:29 AM
I wouldn't-chances are that by then you won't want to!

Take care.

onang
May 9, 2011, 06:41 AM
I'm really having a hard time decoding what's in the mind of men especially in a relationship. They will make girls fall in love with them and after that they will just break them? Can you guys give me something true about what makes guys tick? For me to know what exactly their thinking?

onang
May 9, 2011, 07:06 AM
I see.. thank you so much amicon. This is really helpful.

dwidrick
May 9, 2011, 07:35 AM
There are many variable for why this happens and I am not going to pretend that I know a lot of them haha. But coming from experience I know that with some women it takes a while for them to let down their wall they have up for a man to finally see what they are truly like. This is not necessarily a fault of either side but this wall tends to coincide with their full personality and once it comes down then the women is usually in live by that point.

To put it plainly, it takes time so see all of what the other half is all about... sometimes it just takes until one side is fully invested before things, good or bad, are realized.

amicon
May 9, 2011, 08:21 AM
Good luck onang,look after yourself.
><

ironhide262
May 9, 2011, 08:53 AM
They will make girls fall in love with them and after that they will just break them?

I have heard guys say this very statement about girls too.

That's a very big question... you never know exactly what anyone is thinking, anytime.

In general though, you should never just give your heart away... people must earn it!

talaniman
May 9, 2011, 10:27 AM
They will make girls fall in love with them and after that they will just break them?

Its never them making you do anything, its always you who are responsible for yourself, and what you do.

Love is a big risk we take to get a very rich reward. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't. The important thing to know, is what to do when it doesn't work like we want it too.

That's why you give yourself time to heal properly, and then you can decide what you want to do about it. That's why you also give yourself the time to know if the risk of giving your heart to a stranger is worth it, or not, or if they deserve it.

Most times its us who fall quick and hard, and get carried away by feelings, before we have all the facts. Getting facts takes time also.

Its all about TIME, and how you use that time that counts. You can't hurry love, and you can't hurry a proper healing.

Leave this guy, and his whole family alone, and heal properly, because they are all being nice, and civil to you, so don't get false hope from this.

onang
May 11, 2011, 12:25 AM
Thank you talaniman.. yes, you're correct only time can tell. Right now, I'm shifting my focus to my family and friends. I'm happy to myself because I'm brave enough to surpass this challenge of mine. I Admit, before I was having a hard time coping with it because he was my first boyfriend. And, I'm the type of woman who is serious when it comes to relationship. Before I enter any kind of relationship I always see to it that I'm ready and sure about it. I just don't like to hurt other people's feelings but in the long run I ended up being hurt by the person I love the most?

onang
May 11, 2011, 12:33 AM
Do I need to reply or say thank you if my ex greets me on my birthday?
I'm on NC with my ex now, but sometimes when he texts I have the urge to reply to him. My birthday is coming so what should I do if he greets me? I just want to be prepared. I'm serious to the NC rule because I still have feelings for him. I want to move forward already so what should I do? Your response will be appreciated.Thank you:)

ironhide262
May 11, 2011, 04:59 AM
If you are really serious about NC then why can you receive texts from him?
But, to answer your question, No, you don't have to reply to him... you're on NC.
Delete his number from your phone and eliminate any other ways he can contact you.
Best of luck to you!

onang
May 11, 2011, 05:07 AM
Thanks ironhide. I already deleted all his contacts, his number on my phone and I already blocked him in my Facebook account. I was just asking about that because he has my number. Anyway, thank you. I'm still serious in NC rule.

thadevilsadvocate
May 11, 2011, 08:33 AM
Agree with ironhide... he is no longer your boyfriend, therefore you have every right to do as you choose. You are your own person and have NO obligations to him.

amicon
May 11, 2011, 09:40 AM
NC=no contact-delete his messages without reading them if you can't block his number.

mmresd
May 11, 2011, 09:44 AM
You need to keep up with the NC and not be reading his messages. Just erase them. Better yet, change your number and stop contact with him altogether. Also, you never HAVE to do anything...

Good luck,
Javi

Fr_Chuck
May 11, 2011, 10:09 AM
If you are on NO CONTACT, you don't read any texts he sends, don't listen to voice mails and don't open emails.

So there will be nothing to respond to.