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Idkwhat3
Apr 16, 2011, 06:14 AM
We are 18. And in high school. I do a lot of extracurriculars and she does none. We see each other three out of five weekdays and both weekend nights weekly. Every time I need to do an extracurricular instead of spending ime with her, she gets upset and cries, and makes me feel so guilty. What do I do?

amicon
Apr 16, 2011, 06:35 AM
Tell her to get a life that's not 100% dependable upon your being there for her.

People shouldn't be joined at the hip!

talaniman
Apr 16, 2011, 08:49 AM
I agree with Amicon, she needs to get a life without you that makes her happy.

Needy girlfriends are very high maintenance. They make you feel bad to get what they want. Don't let them, or its you who will be mad at the things you missed doing kissing someone else's needy butt!!

Idkwhat3
Apr 16, 2011, 04:15 PM
How do tell her that? That's harsh..

DoulaLC
Apr 16, 2011, 06:09 PM
Tell her that while you enjoy being with her, and only want to see her, you also enjoy the other activities you are involved in. These obviously will take some of your time.

Ask her if there are things she likes to do, or something she has been wanting to try, or friends she wants to hang out with. Encourage her to go out with friends and have a good time now and then.

For a relationship to be healthy, both people have to have full lives that they can share with each other. No one can provide everything to someone else.

If she simply can't accept that, and continues to cause you to feel guilty for enjoying other things, then perhaps you will need to think about whether it is the sort of relationship you need to be in.

mmresd
Apr 21, 2011, 12:17 PM
You break up with her... That's what you do.

Your main focus should be on school and extracurricular activities are very import when trying to higher your education. Drop her so that you don't have to drag her around when you should be doing your work. No benefits of being with her.

Good luck,
Javi