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HolmesdaleGal
Mar 14, 2011, 12:51 PM
I'm 18 I'm still living at home and I am in full time education my sister is 45 married with two kids and lives just 3 doors down. We both have the same mum and dad however my sister is always at our house her husband is at work and her kids are both teenagers theirself. She is always at our house from 8 in the morning till half 7 at night and does not go home between my mum moans at us cause she gets irritated by her and it is causing a lot of family rows. Even if me my mum and dad go out for the day she sits in OUR living room watching OUR TV. She's always here and she does nothing to help my mum I help do the washing up and tidying of the house where she will sit on the seat all day and watch my mum do the jobs. I'm so fed up and depressed I don't no what to do we all no the problem but we can't do nothing about it she won't go home! Please help me what can I do I'm so depressed all the time I just feel like crying she should be looking after her family instead she's taking mine I no we have the same mum and dt she's had them for 25 years on her own please give me some advice
At christmas I spent 2 weeks with my aunty who live 20 miles away but I cannot drive and I have school but that was the happiest two weeks of my life

talaniman
Mar 14, 2011, 01:00 PM
Hate to say it, but if your mom and dad don't run her away, I doubt you will.

adviceishere
Mar 14, 2011, 01:01 PM
Wow, your poor sister, she's not welcome in her own parents home? Have you ever thought that she might be feeling extremely lonely or is having martial problems with her husband? She could be depressed herself and just wants the love of her family around her, she could be frightened at home, there has to be a reason why she doesn't like to be at home all day and I highly doubt its to annoy you. You need to be a good sister and friend to her. You want your mom and dad all to yourself, do you know how that sounds? Childish...

ken007nielsen
Mar 14, 2011, 03:51 PM
I agree with adviceishere, BUT she could life a finger around the house if she spends so much time there!

justcurious55
Mar 14, 2011, 04:13 PM
Do your parents say anything to her?

Since it is there house, and there rules and all, I would leave it for them to deal with her.
Unless there's a direct issue between the two of you.

I wouldn't rule out the possibility that she is having issues that she doesn't know how to deal with at home, but that's not the only possibility. Some people really do just mooch off others. I had a cousin who always used to come around. He'd hog the TV, the computer, make a mess of the kitchen and then expect everyone else to clean up after him and then drive him all over whenever he wanted. And it wasn't because he had any issues at his house, it was because he was simply lazy and inconsiderate. It took my aunt and uncle changing the locks to make it stop.

Fr_Chuck
Mar 14, 2011, 06:26 PM
Have you told your mom and dad how you feel ?

Have you told your sister how you feel ?

HolmesdaleGal
Mar 15, 2011, 12:36 PM
My sisters house has stuff piled everywhere her heating does not work (hasnt for 2 1/2 years and she complains that she hasn't got enough money to sort it out but she has no helath problems her awnser for not getting a job is she can't be bothered. That is why she spends so much time at our house my mum and dad have had arguments with her because they want a bit of space and want her to sort her house out to make it a home. She does not listen to them and she justs sits on the seat and crys about it at first we all felt sorry for her and offered her our help but she just says she doesn't want any of us going through her stuff, without sorting this problem out she can't have anyone out to sort out her heating. My aunty has offered to give her the money as a gift but she says she's "happy as she is".

HolmesdaleGal
Mar 15, 2011, 12:38 PM
My sisters house has stuff piled everywhere her heating does not work (hasnt for 2 1/2 years and she complains that she hasn't got enough money to sort it out but she has no helath problems her awnser for not getting a job is she can't be bothered. That is why she spends so much time at our house my mum and dad have had arguments with her because they want a bit of space and want her to sort her house out to make it a home. She does not listen to them and she justs sits on the seat and crys about it at first we all felt sorry for her and offered her our help but she just says she doesn't want any of us going through her stuff, without sorting this problem out she can't have anyone out to sort out her heating. My aunty has offered to give her the money as a gift but she says she's "happy as she is".

adviceishere
Mar 16, 2011, 02:25 AM
my sisters house has stuff piled everywhere her heating does not work (hasnt for 2 1/2 years and she complains that she hasnt got enough money to sort it out but she has no helath problems her awnser for not getting a job is she can't be bothered.

OK I can totally understand your frustration now! That would most likely drive me insane. But to save yourself from all this agro just keep doing what your doing like college and helping around the house, let your parents deal with her, just thank your lucky stars that you know your going to be an independent adult in the future... sadly for your sister, if she doest cop on soon she will be forever dependent on the older part of your family and they are not going to be around forever, then what will she do... :eek:

adviceishere
Mar 16, 2011, 02:37 AM
Oh and I can completely relate to you, my sister and her 2 children have moved back home to my folks place, so we are totally cramped.

She takes complete advantage of my mother and father with free babysitting daily! I had to move out of my bedroom so they would have somewhere to stay.

I'm now in the little room with a baby on the way, and although I'm not working at the time being I clean the whole house for my mother as she works in the mornings (also getting my sisters kids up for school). Then my lazy sister slumps out of bed always late to take them to school cause she smokes too much weed and sit around the house doing nothing while I run around cleaning after her, oh and robs all my clothes, she even stole my deodrante one day! A roll on one! Yuck! And loaned it to her friend!

But... I take great pride in knowing that, even though I can't work at the moment, I'm putting my bit in and helping my mother out even if it means cleaning up after my sloppy sister, cause if I wasn't there my mother would have a break down. So just rememeber that your doing it to help your folks out. Wow I feel better after letting all that out LOL! :D