I made an appt for my kids first visit at the dentist. Son is 4 and daughter 15months. It was a horrid experience. I wanted to hear from others if its just me? Or is the dentist we went to see off...

First, when I called in I explained that I have very sensitive kids. I asked how this particular "Children's Dental Group" was greared for a child's first visit. They told me not to worry, that they deal with kids all day long and the place caters to little kids so there will be lots of fun distractions for them.

Ok, so here how it really was. Not even ONE toy - yes there was a TV but at reception. Bare walls, simplistic and clean and looked like a sterile hospital environment. Of course, once my kids saw people with masks (which is everyone there) they started screaming. I was busy calming one and then the other.

Boom - extrays - I had to hold my son donw for that while my baby daughter was screaming, x-rays on a 15 month old?? Strange - but - I had paid already. Teeth cleaning and then the dentist came in, said your son has 3 cavities, let me show you. He asked me to hold him down? My daughter was hysterical. While everone is screaming he said I can quickly fill them - so when he showed me, he actually filled the cavities with METAL!!

If he would have asked I would have REFUSED I didn't want metal in my son's mouth. I have it and its horrible. I hate it.

I walked out of there - all three of us in tears. I told the dentest he was not professional, that the place is NOT geared for kids, that the lied to me and that he should have given me the option to select enamel or metal.

Now my kids are traumatised by the dentist and both my kids have phenominal memories. What should I do??

HELLO
First... I am sorry for the bad experence you had. And that your children could be a little traumatised. Also sounds like their office is not very 'child friendly'. Again, very sorry for your situation.
Now I want to touch on a few things. First, you will need to find a new DDS for your kids. Please ask around. And when you finally pick one, please tell them about what happened, they might take a few extra steps to make your children feel safer about being there.
I believe that metal fillings are just fine for teeth. Millions of people have them, and there is no proof that they are harmful. But since you are so concerned about them, just remember they were put on baby teeth, so they will not be there forever. (or you could replace them, but totally not worth that to put your child through that)
Last, remember that how you react to this terrible situation, your child will also see. And will also react the same way. So I pray you can turn this negative to a positive.
Good Luck
RM

Why did your daughter get x-rays?

The metal was probably chrome which is often used on baby teeth. It's much less expensive for a tooth that will soon fall out.

I checked out the children's dentist office alone (without my children) before I took my kids in for a first appointment. Please do that next time. I had also relied on friends with small children to refer me to their dentists, but that wasn't a good idea after all. I discovered my own dentist was a world of wisdom when it came to referrals.

Just wanted to correct the last commenter... the silver fillings are not chrome, they are a mixture of several metals (mercury, tin, etc.) They are correct that they are cheaper for teeth that will eventually come out. Please don't be alarmed that they contain mercury, there is some debate about the release of mercury but all the research has not definitively proven they are bad, I have a few in my mouth and have had no issues.
Secondly, I have worked in several dental offices and with several dentists, not one would have done x-rays on a 15 month old child. Not one of them would have done the filling without your consent first, and not one would have had you hold down your child. They have traumatized your children but your reaction will definitely impact them as well. They need to know that you support the people working on them so they can trust them too... but before you give these people your trust, you need to meet them first.

There are child specialists, called Pedodontists that go through extra schooling to become a specialist. In these offices, you will find that they may or may not be great with children, unfortunately, not all dental professionals are good with children and some of these people go on and become pedodontists... that being said, they do offer the option of sedating your children for work to be done and multiple teeth can be completed in one visit. This minimizes the traumatic experience that they may have had. At some point, when the child is old enough or mature enough, they will be referred to a regular dentist... you will obviously not take them to the previous dentist you mentioned so do what you need to do to try to counteract their trauma... find a dentist that you are comfortable with and make a "meet and greet" type appointment where they can meet the new dentist and staff without actually doing anything that may scare them.

Good luck and remember that good dentists are out there...

Just wanted to correct the last commenter...the silver fillings are not chrome, they are a mixture of several metals (mercury, tin, etc.)
At the age of two, my older son ended up with a mouthful of chrome crowns (the pedodontist was specific about this), was even hospitalized to get the work done efficiently. (He had a serious problem with thin enamel that was overwhelmed by some of the sugars and acids in the foods he ate and drank.)

First

1. I would say that the children were given part of being scared by the parent, who most likely had them more scared by their own fear.

2. you never take two children at the same time, unless they are good and do well at the doctor.

3. most do not have toys out in the lobby, due to health and safety reasons because of germ spreading between various kids. But TV and the such are common

4, most in this area have TV and videos in the ceiling for child to watch while having teeth done.

It is obvious you prolonged it, since you allowed the one to be 4 for their first visit to the denist.

They wear masks, because they have to wear masks while they are being treated, and this could have been made easier by getting masks, wearing them around the home, and having them wear some to get used to them.

And yes, you go visit every doctor or dentist and interview them before choising one to go to.