Hi all, I'm so confused I am probably leaving my job in about 3 months for a better position with a competing company. My manager is currently spending a lot of time developing me to be a manager, and I feel bad when I know in the back of my head I will be leaving. But if I go to this other job I will be making probably 5 dollars more an hour and the entire company is more my style, and it's a company I've dreamt about working for since I began in this industry! I haven't gotten the job yet, but I am 99% sure I will be getting it, due to family affiliation and the fact that I am perfectly qualified. But I don't want to tell my manager until I have got the job, yet I don't want to waste his time, what should I do? Help please!

You have two choices - tell him and don't waste his time OR don't tell him and POSSIBLY waste his time.

Can't you start the new job before three months from now - that would solve the problem.

Absolutely do not tell him before being 100% certain. This is business, no matter how nice he is. He could go out of business, lay you off, the other business could fail. 3 months is a very long time.

When you are sure, I would give him 4-6 weeks notice, and let him know that you wanted to more than double the standard 2 weeks notice in appreciation, and help train a replacement. You do risk what he does next, but most will not be retailiatory.

But JudyKayTee, she doesn't have a formal offer yet. It certainly is better to find a way to make the best of this, rather than having them groom you for management when you don't intend to stay. If you want the best possible reference from your current employer this is a matter that should be resolved. In part your decision may depend on your State laws, if you work in an "at will" State, then the worst case is that they could fire you. If they can't fire you, then why not tell him? You may be able to safely let him know you are looking and let him know why. May be you should be training your replacement. There is no right answer, personally I believe that being professional and honest leads to the best outcomes, good managers respect this. Consider the worst outcome and the best outcome. Good luck.

But JudyKayTee, she doesn't have a formal offer yet. It certainly is better to find a way to make the best of this, rather than having them groom you for management when you don't intend to stay. If you want the best possible reference from your current employer this is a matter that should be resolved. In part your decision may depend on your State laws, if you work in an "at will" State, then the worst case is that they could fire you. If they can't fire you, then why not tell him? You may be able to safely let him know you are looking and let him know why. May be you should be training your replacement. There is no right answer, personally I believe that being professional and honest leads to the best outcomes, good managers respect this. Consider the worst outcome and the best outcome. Good luck.


Right, so she - and you appear to know it's a "she" - tells him exactly what she's posted here.

I didn't suggest she say she's leaving.

I said she should tell him - and I mean tell him exactly what is posted here.

Unless there is a formal offer and it is in writing, no you don't tell anyone.

So I can't start yet because this certain "branch" has not started hiring yet it will be brand new and is not opening for like 4 months but they are hiring around a month before opening. Also I'm pretty sure I can not get fired from this job because you have to really get written up 3 times before being fired, plus I'm a good employee and it's a coorperate business so they will absolutely not go out of business. It will simply be an inconveniance for him and I want a good referance.

You don't have to give your notice in order to inform your manager that you are considering a change. Every situation is unique, a good manager will appreciate your honesty and professionalism. A bad one will not. I have personally never felt maligned by a employee that shared such a situation, may be sad to hear they may leave, but most often also happy to see someone improving their career. Who knows, you might have reason to apply for a job with this company at some time in the future.

Hello M:

You're not there to make friends. You're not there to make enemy's either. This is simple... DO your job the best you can while you're taking MONEY from them. That doesn't mean you need to tell them your deepest darkest secrets.

Wait till you get the other job, and give 2 weeks notice - nothing more, and nothing less. That's proper, acceptable and an honorable way to conduct yourself.

excon