BENEY
Feb 5, 2011, 09:47 AM
I am 31 and have been married for nearly 10 years. As I am muslim I could not tell anyone about my ex.
We dated for nearly 3 years on and off and he was married at the time but going through a divorce. He was my first in everything and I loved him dearly. He worked down the road from were I lived and could meet him easily. Evan though I loved him, I knew I would get married to a guy my parents had chosen for me, whice in the long run was better because after his divorce he got married again to a girl of his parents choice, whom I did not know about.
I got married and came back to england with my husband and found it hard to start with but because I realised how much my husband loved me I gave my marriage 100%.A few months later, through friends I found out that he had got married again while he was seeing me. I felt as though my heart and been torn apart. He had lied to me. I had not been in contact with him after I got married but I needed to get it out of my system and therfore had it out with him. His answer to all my questions was that it wasn't as though I could have married you! At that point I realised that he never loved me, all I was was sex to him.
We went our separate ways and did not have contact for nearly 2 years. I learnd to forgive him because I knew he was married when I first got with him so I was more at fault then him.
Last week I bumped into him and we had a chat, since then I cannot stop thinking about him.I am once again that 20 year old who loved him.I feel guilty as my husband is non the wiser but I cannot help my feelings.I know that if I tell him he will take advantage of my feelings again but I just long to be in his arms once again. HELP!
We dated for nearly 3 years on and off and he was married at the time but going through a divorce. He was my first in everything and I loved him dearly. He worked down the road from were I lived and could meet him easily. Evan though I loved him, I knew I would get married to a guy my parents had chosen for me, whice in the long run was better because after his divorce he got married again to a girl of his parents choice, whom I did not know about.
I got married and came back to england with my husband and found it hard to start with but because I realised how much my husband loved me I gave my marriage 100%.A few months later, through friends I found out that he had got married again while he was seeing me. I felt as though my heart and been torn apart. He had lied to me. I had not been in contact with him after I got married but I needed to get it out of my system and therfore had it out with him. His answer to all my questions was that it wasn't as though I could have married you! At that point I realised that he never loved me, all I was was sex to him.
We went our separate ways and did not have contact for nearly 2 years. I learnd to forgive him because I knew he was married when I first got with him so I was more at fault then him.
Last week I bumped into him and we had a chat, since then I cannot stop thinking about him.I am once again that 20 year old who loved him.I feel guilty as my husband is non the wiser but I cannot help my feelings.I know that if I tell him he will take advantage of my feelings again but I just long to be in his arms once again. HELP!