9 years ago I adopted my son and ever since my mother in law has in my eyes taught him disrepect (mostly with me) When he was two I found out that she had given him coffee and when he would ask me for gum,pop etc. I would explain to him that he was too young. My mother In law turns around and gives it to him in front of me. This has gone on for years.
This Christmas (2010) we went out of town to visit brother in law and wife (in laws where there too) well on the 24th we sat down for dinner and out of the blue my Mother in law started to jab at me again this time in front of my son, I kept my cool and left the table while my husband let her have it (it is about time) my son was so upsit that he felt it was all his fault.
What do I do with her she is driving me insane, she never seems to let me be the mom. She had her boys and God blessed me with a son

Help

I've got one of those. You will never win. My mil is 91 now and going strong (i.e. hasn't changed), and still giggles when she thinks she has gotten away with something. The only thing you can do is learn how to maintain self-control (so she doesn't know she is "getting to" you) and not strangle her. At least your husband is sticking up for you. When you're at home, be sure to teach your son the right way to do things, and don't give in to being "like Grandma."