HI,
I would really appreciate if you could give me some advice, cause I am really confused. I have been with my husband for seven years, 2 1/2 in marriage and we have 2 year old child. I was always trying to build this perfect picture marriage, taking care of our child, he never lift a finger about anything, never really helped me about anything, I did everything by myself, we always had fights about these things, but since they never resolved, I just continued to do theim alone, just for the sake of not fighting. We somehow drifted apart, but I was always saying, it is just a period, having a small child etc. Then I started working, and met a colleague, for six months we were just hanging and talking, he is also married, unhappily. Then when I left that job, we became closer and started seeing each other. We came to the love you stage, which really scares me, since he started talking about leaving our spouses. I am really confused, first since I was always against affairs, I was always saying that an affair is the biggest disrespect, now my husband is giving me the attention I wanted, but I have someone else on my mind, who is also giving me attention and making me feel like never before. I don't know what to do or think, I don't want to leave my husband, that is not an option for me, I want to make things right with him, but I can't stop thinking about my colleague?
Please give me an advice what to do?

Your confusion stems from different part of your brain wanting different things and your failure to integrate the different wants into a single one. One part of your brain wants to stay with your husband, the other wants to leave him. Both parts have a not-an-option-policy towards the other one. This leaves you with no option. So the first step is to acknowledge that a not-an-option-policy gets you nowhere and drop it. Leaving your husband must be just as much an option as staying with him.
The second step is acknowledging that your husband is not the guilty one here. Marriage is a contract that you sign without reading it. Don't hold anybody but yourself responsible if you don't like the terms. So take responsibility for your marriage and make a list of terms that you need in this contract in order for you to gain something from it. Then see whether your husband accepts and whether you can in turn accept his terms or not and stay or leave him accordingly.
The third step would be to acknowledge that you already failed once in assessing the values of a man as a partner. That should tell you to be cautious about your emotions towards the other man. Don't just plunge into another affair that will end badly. You created a false dichtonomy with your husband vs. the other man. There is a third option: neither. (And for that matter the fourth option both, but I recommend against that).

Two unhappy people who have bonded in misery seldom find happiness, so cut him from your life, so you can give full attention to make your marriage, and home better. Sure its work, but that's what its all about.

The other guy is but a distraction from the real job at hand, and you are as much a distraction for him, as he is you. A lose-lose situation for you both.

Neither of you needs that.